Friday, November 13, 2015

JLA casting redux, the uncensored version

You might be surprised by seeing a cover from the JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA at the introduction of this post but as we have four candidates from the team in this fantasy movie casting add on - and Power Girl has also been a longtime member of the team - I found it only appropriate.


Now when I said in my second alternatives post that I would do another post as soon as I had some ideas I didn´t mean as soon as this. But while doing all the posts these months there have been some new cult sirens added to the blog who I think would make worthy addition to my previous JLA castings. Now I have said that some of the candidates here are from the JSA rather than from the JLA and the reason for that is that I didn´t want to recast all the roles I have done so far. On the other hand here are some new ideas that got stuck in my head and I can´t concentrate on anything else until I have voiced them. Some of the animated GIFs may not be suitable for work which is why I´m going to make a slightly cleaned up version which you can find here. Anyway, let´s get to the candidates and we´re starting with one I had on my mind for quite some time.

Yunoka Doyle as Lightning ( Jennifer Pierce )

While you have probably never heard her name you have seen my first candidate on The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air next to sexbomb Tatyana Ali.


Tatyana started on the show as the sweet little cousin but after a few season she was all grown up and filled out nicely in all the right places.


Okay, you are probably wondering what all of this has to do with Yunoka Doyle. In episode four of season six titled Bourgie Sings The Blues Ashley Banks ( played by Tatyana Ali ) throws a party while her parents are away to get the chance to talk to a guy she likes. She is there with her two bosom bodies, Janet an asian ( played by Nicole Bilderback ) and Keesha. To impress the boy she likes Ashley has dolled herself up but then she gets nervous and insecure and her friends have to push her to talk to the guy.  


But as good as Tatyana Ali looked in the episode she was outshined by actress Yunoka Doyle who really embodied the role of Ashley´s " bosom buddy " Keesha perfectly. With a big emphasis on the " bosom " part.


So Yunoka would be perfect as the daughter of Jefferson Pierce a.k.a. Black Lightning since you can believe Jakeem Thunder getting all hot and bothered for her electrifying body. I bet he´d love to check out her big light bulbs. And the best part is that Jennifer is not Jefferson Pierce only daughter with super powers so we could bring in rumpshaker Tatyana Ali.


Although I would probably pick her from her phase AFTER she finished with The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air when her big boobs almost exploded.


Erika Andersch a.k.a. Gladiator Diamond as Power Girl ( Kara Zor - El )

The only reason why she isn´t my number one pick for the role is that it is extremely difficult to find material for her. Especially since I didn´t know her name. But even so there are not a lot of good quality pictures of her and most of the videos on YouTube about the American Gladiators show are from new versions of the show. But if I had my handy time machine I would surely get Diamond to play the Maid of Monumental Mammaries.


Debbe Dunning as former Female Fury Knockout ( Kay )

Since I already casted Christina Hendricks and Cynthia Brimhall as Maxima I thought my contingent of redheads was exhausted but while doing some research I came across Knockout from the SUPERBOY comics. She was a member of the Female Furies and later the Suicide Squad.


You know that you have a mean streak when Granny Goodness deems you too rebellious and chains you to the fire pits of Apokolips. Being the tough badass she is Knockout not only survived this she later escaped to earth where she clashed with Superboy on various occassions in which she always wiped the floor with him. Before long Superboy gave in to her obvious charms and teamed up with her in a misguided attempt to reform her while Knockout was using the opportunity to turn Superboy into her boy toy. I´m not kidding, this is what the official entry in the DC wiki says although they claim it means doing whatever she says when we know it actually means making him Knockout´s sex dildo. Anyway, when she was trying to keep a low profile Knockout was working as a stripper and Double D Debbe Dunning would have no problem playing that part.


Janet Jackson as nymphomanic french teacher Dominique Deepthroat


I don´t know why this idea didn´t occur to me sooner but there was this issue in JUSTICE LEAGUE EUROPE where most of the team had to take french lessons. And Janet already played a hot school teacher in Jermaine Dupri´s GOTTA GETCHA video, in fact her performance was so hot that it never aired in Germany so Janet would be perfect as the busty teacher.


I know that the teacher in the comic was white and not as busty as Janet but with her huge melons any teacher Janet plays is the ultimate big breasted sexbomb and I´m taking a few liberties with the script anyway.


In the comic the Justice League Europe wound up in the same french class as the Injustice League and they ended up fighting. Now in my movie I would continue the story as Captain Atom receives a personal letter from the french teacher which is an invitation for more french lessons and the Captain thinks what a drag that is. He does not suspect what the horny teacher really has up her sleeve - or up her garter belt in Janet´s case.


When Captain Atom arrives at the classroom he´s very surprised as he seems to be the only pupil. Although not as surprised as when Dominique arrives in an outfit right from a Big MILF Tits At School porn video. She grabs an apple he had brought to tease her but now she is the one teasing him and the laughter gets stuck in his throat as she licks it lasciviously.


While the Captain is still reeling from the first shock the french teacher turns to the board revealing her bootilicious bubblebutt, giving him even more of a huge erection ( which he desperately is trying to surpress ).


While fighting against his giant boner Captain tries to distract the sexy teacher with some verbal banter which doesn´t work as well as he hoped.

Captain Atom : That´s quite the unusual teacher uniform you´re wearing.

Dominique Deepthroat : Well, I used to work my way zrough college as a stripper. But don´t tell anybody. If my pupils found out my zecret those perverts would assault me sexually even more zan they already do.


As Dominique starts showing off her stripper skills the Captain can no longer hide his pulsating manhood which is about to break the desk in half. Seeing as she is about to reach her goal she presses her advantage.


Dominique : So, I hear you americains are obsessed with oral sex. Le blowjob, n´ est - ce pas ? You all make fun of my last name - Deepthroat. Do you know why le oral sex is called french in the rest of the world ?

Before Captain Atom can even process the question Dominique starts playing Carly Simon´s James Bond song Nobody Does It Better while licking the globe. He can only watch mesmerized as he gets even harder.


At this point the good Captain surrenders to his basest instincts and after changing the music to Jane Birkin´s moan aria Je t´aime the french teacher starts riding him like a wild stallion. Now not only do we have Janet in a raunchy sex scene where she takes off all her clothes we also can cast another silver screen goddess for the role she previously had. 


Which means that I can put Janet Jackson AND Halle Berry in the same movie since they were cast for the same role in different versions. And on top of that I can have Beyonce in the flick since she has an entirely different role to fill out. AND Mariah Carey from the alternatives list.

Tutti Frutti Intro Girl Amy Charles as Mirage ( Miriam Delgado )

Originally I thought about casting her as Big Barda but I didn´t want to loose Maria Gracia Cucinotta or Roberta Vasquez so I thought I couldn´t include her in my cast. But then I came across this alternative version of Raven and realized that blow up sex doll model Amy would be perfect as the sex hungry Team Titan member who shapeshifted into Starfire´s porn body to use Nightwing as her personal sex toy in all night sex marathons.


Unknown Tutti Frutti dancer as Cyclone ( Maxine Hunkel )

Since we are on the subject of Tutti Frutti girls I should include my all time favorite. I thought about casting her as Batgirl or Huntress but I think she would be great as the fun loving, fast taslking heart of the Justice Society of America.  And while it would be impossible to find her in the real world since I doné even know her name in my fantasy casting she would be plucked from taping the show nobody in Germany watched.


Okay, everybody watched the show bout nobody admitted it. Now I have already done it in my post about ITALIAN SOCCER MOM SIMONA VENTURA but for the benefit of new readers who might have missed this I should probably explain what TUTTI FRUTTI was. There was a show called COLPO GROSSO from Italy with some dancers dressed as certain fruits who would dance to a special song and when the last refrain said " chin chin " they popped their tops and the candidates had to bet ( before they opened their tops ) if they had stickers of fruits on their breasts or not.

If they had stickers with fruits on them the candidates would win points and if they had enough of them they could get the women who presented the european nations to strip. Who could get the most women the most naked was the winner and the points they would score were called country points or Länderpunkte, a word that has become a household expression in Germany. It´s not unusual to hear german tv viewers say : Well, we´re not going to see any Länderpunkte in this movie. Anyway, the show was done to promote the Ecu, the new currency for a United Europe ( no, that really didn´t work out that well ) but the important part was getting to see girls strip. Although the men always couldn´t remember which girl represented which country and so often the hottest looking girls never got their turn to get naked. The show was adapted by various countries and it was called AY QUE CALOR in Spain and TUTTI FRUTTI here in Germany.


Samantha Phillips as Liberty Belle / Jesse Quick ( Jesse Chambers )

Is it fate or just coincidence that I picked the blonde with two big 34Ds who appeared in the only Andy Sidaris movie with two titles - The Dallas Connection and Deadworks - as the scarlet speedster with the streamlined chest area who has two superhero names and two sets of super powers ?


In the comics she´s married to Rex Tyler a.k.a. Hourman and her female colleagues in the Justice Society of America tease her by calling her Jesse Quickie. They also think that Jesse would only has sex with her husband for one hour because that´s how long his Miraclo pill gives him enhanced strength, stamina and so on. What they don´t know - and Jesse isn´t going to tell them - is that she calls her hubby Sex Tyler because he is better endowed than a horse and doesn´t need pills to last all night. So when they have absolved a few hours of sweaty bumping and grinding of their unmentionables and are just about to climax THAT is when Jesse allows Rex to take a pill prolonging it one hour. BEST. ORGASM. EVER.


Ava Cadell as super villain Cheshire ( Jade Nguyen )

Even though the doctor with the sex diploma played the oversexed love advisor in later Andy Sidaris movies she first appeared as a hired killer in DO OR DIE so she would be perfect as the exotic looking deadly sexbomb. 

 
In the comics everybody is always awestruck that Roy Harper a.k.a. Speedy a.k.a. Arsenal a.k.a. Red Arrow ( is he like the Hank Pym of the DC universe ? ) had sex with a super villain but boy, if she looks like Ava - how could he not ? Tell me you would not tap that. I absolutely would !


Angie Savage as Star Spangled Kid ( Courtney Whitmore )

I admit I had to look her up but the buxom blonde is perfect for the role. At first I thought about casting her as Black Canary but since I already had someone else for the role I forgot about her. But while watching one of my favorite clips with her the other day I remembered that she would be a good fit ( no pun intended ) for Star Spangled Kid who in the JSA comics had problems because of her relationship with Captain Marvel. Which everybody thinks in inappropriate because they don´t know that he is the same age as Courtney in his secret identity of Billy Batson. Well, there was this story in YOUNG JUSTICE where all the kid heroes were turned into adults and all the adult heroes were turned into kids. In the movie we could have a scene in which they are dealing with the effects of that and Courtney bullies Billy into sexperimenting with their new adult bodies. 


So these are my further candidates for now and maybe there will be one more post. I might even do the long awaited AVENGERS movie casting.


Now you would not think that sexbomb Tracy Scoggins ( 62 ) and Jimmy Kimmel ( 48 ) have something in common but besides being born on the same day both of them have been in adaptions of Superman although Jimmy´s part was cut because it was too awesome. Decide for yourself.



Our third birthday worth mentioning is Robert Louis Stevenson and since I already posted a cartoon adaption of this classic book here is the horror version from the british Hammer film studio starring Christopher Lee.



Speaking about cartoons since it´s a bit more risky I decide to add this video of the sexiest women in anime to the post. Now I finally know who all the characters are all these hot girls are cosplaying as at conventions.



Speaking about animes, a big part why they are so popular is the high percentage of fan service they include. Not one to let herself be outdone by asian cartoon girls Tara Babcock gives us the ultimate in fan service. As a hint : yes, she´s going to do with that banana exactly what you think she is going to do and later on she substitutes the banana with a dildo and yes, the last time the video was deleted so watch it while you can.



The same goes for this short video of Ay Que Calor which has an appearance by the megabusty Amy Charles in a stunning red dress.



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