Saturday, March 05, 2016

Happy birthday cult siren Jolene Blalock !

Today one of tv´s hottest sci fi babes, Jolene Blalock celebrates her 41st birthday. She is of course best known for playing T´Pol on ENTERPRISE.

As longtime readers from the blog may have noticed this is a shorter and slightly more family friendly re - post of last year´s post on Jolene Blalock and you can find the totally oversexed and uncensored version here .

From all the alien sexbombs on all the different Star Trek tv series T´Pol is on the top of my list. STAR TREK VOYAGER stuck Jeri Ryan and her big tits in a skin - tight suit in the show after Season 3 as 36DD drone of Borg Seven of Nine but ENTERPRISE just went and put the alien blow up sexdoll in the main cast of the show right from the pilot episode. Thanks, guys.

Sub - Commander / Commander T'Pol was the hottest vulcan sexbomb in the history of the universe and Enterprise's version of said Barbie of Borg ( read more about Jeri Ryan and the hot Star Trek women in her post ).

Under an agreement with the Vulcan High Command and Earths Starfleet T´Pol was placed aboard the NX - 01 Enterprise as Science and Executive Officer, serving under Captain Jonathan Archer. However she would eventually be brainwashed into " serving under " Commander Charles ' Dubya ' Tucker the Third, while under the effects of Trellium D.

I mean a Trellium - drugged out, semi emotional vulcan love slave with great curves and a killer rack - what's not to like about that ? Commander Fucker.....I mean Tucker had mul - t´pol orgasms thanks to the forbidden vulcan sexmassage....I mean T´Pol´s vulcan " body relaxation massage ".

Although I have to say T´Pol was also needy for Tucker´s earth meatpole because while Phlox gave her the idea to practice the vulcan massage it was T´Pol who went all " Kama Sutra on acid laced steroids " on Tucker.

She was so turned on by their midnight olympics that she had to use the old " it´s just for scientific reasons " schtick to bang him into submission.

Not that he put up much resistance to her since he´s been whacking off to her body since their first sessions in the decontamination chamber.

He even slipped Doctor Phlox a few bucks to get some quality time alone with T´Pol in decontamination like most of the horny males on board.

But he only managed to get her to strip and put the detox lotion all over his body with her boobs the first halfdozen times. It was totally worth it.

Okay, she didn´t repeat the sex experiment after finally banging Tucker silly ( which is the first rule of every scientific research - not having wild sex......but to repeat the experiment ) but it is not know if it was because of disappointment or because she was afraid she would like it too much. And in the mirror universe he even helped her out during Pon Farr.

There is this rumor that Pon Farr,the thing that turns all female vulcans into absolute nymphos worse than a cat in heat, was just a cheap attempt by the writers to get a bigger male audience. Which obviously did work as planned. Well, I`m up for anything that lets T´Pol show off her hot body.

Now Pon Farr sounds hot and all, but I´m not sure I could wait another seven years before a lass like T'Pol wanted to explore her biological urges.

Although you would probably need seven years just to recover from getting your brains banged out by T´Pol every day during Pon Farr.

Jolene Blalock's Vulcan portrayal helped keep Star Trek : Enterprise in the limelight, but it was her time spent in decontamination rooms and applying " neuropressure " to colleagues that re - ignited my warp engines.

Reading some online threats you could think Jolene Blalock was the first actress on Star Trek who was brought in to sex the show up. But as a matter of fact Marina Sirtis was on tv long before rocking the cleavage and the best parts of some episodes were Marina breathing heavily.

There are even some online rumors - but there´s probably no truth to it - that her role was supposed to be the ship´s telepathic sexdoll. In the first draft Deanna Troy wasn´t the ship´s counselor but rather the " ship´s consolation officer " a orgasmic priestess from the planet Betasex skilled in all known sex techniques to be used by the male crew for stress relief.

Because of their telepathic abilities the women from Betasex were ideal prostitutes and they also had a very high pain threshold and were very resilient so their clients could go for it. Which happened very often when they were working at some mining outpost frequented by sexstarved aliens with dozens of huge reproductive organs or slimy tentacles.

Anyway, that´s just a silly rumor and there´s probably nothing to it. I mean the whole concept would never have passed american tv censors.

What is strange is the fact that for someone who is just supposed to give people advice she wore a pretty sexed up outfit that would totally defeat the purpose of counseling. All her male customers would be thinking about ripping her uniform off and banging her brains out and knowing it would be really uncomfortable. I guess the reason why they only made her kind of telephatic was that if she knew what the male crew members were thinking she couldn´t walk ten feet in the Enterprise and would never visit the bar. Speaking about the bar, if her role was to give people sage advice why did Guinan do basically the same ? So while still unverified the idea of Deanna Troi not only as the ship´s cleavage but also the ship´s adult entertainment system does have its merit. On the other side we know that the holo deck was used for the same thing. It´s so confusing.

What I could verify is that in the original draft Deanna Troy was supposed to have three breast, Tasha Yar had an unhealthy sexual crush on Wesley Crusher and Captain Picard couldn´t help but noticing  the ship´s Doctor Beverly Crusher´s natural walk resembles that of a striptease queen. Oy. Anyway, click here for more GIFs of Doctor Crusher´s and Deanna Troi´s space yoga and The 21 Times Dr. Beverly Crusher Was Your Fashion Idol .

That´s all for Today´s post, happy 41st Jolene and many happy returns !

We continue with the celebrity birthdays in the video section and first up is german MILF Barbara Schöneberger a.k.a. Boobara Schöneberger or Barbara Schöne Berge depending on which Freudian Slip you tend to.

The talk show host / tv presenter who likes to see herself as a comedian and entertainer turns 42 but I think she could have made quite a career if she would have used her obvious talents more ( 40DDs at her best time ).

I´m not saying she should have done adult movies but her agent did her a disservice when he let her go in the singing / comedy direction when her body was clearly made for nude sex scenes in rated eighteen movies.

Two other hot cinema sexbombs celebrate their anniversaries on this very day. Eva Mendes ( 42 ), who was in two comic adaptions, none of them very good : GHOST RIDER, which is considered to be the " good " Ghost Rider movie after SPIRIT OF VENGEANCE and Frank Miller´s THE SPIRIT movie. At least you can see Miss Mendes´ naked buttocks in the last one.

Speaking of naked buttocks and things that suck hard, if there ever was a movie actress whose full bodied, luscious lips were just made for giving men oral pleasure without end it´s skin flick veteran Rena Riffel who turns 47. The bendable blonde wiggled her whats - it in such cult movies like Undercover Heat, Showgirls and Striptease but also appeared in the god awful Mulholland Drive. Well, everybody can slip up. Anyway, she has upgraded a lot of bad movies with her appearances so thanks for that.

Today we have three musician´s birthdays : Andy Gibb, who would have turned 58, Murray Head, who was in the charts with his hit One Night In Bangkok forever and a day when I was in school who celebrates his 70th anniversary and Eddy Grant who turns 68. The first song I heard from him was Electric Avenue and I think he was on the first record I ever owned, one of those cheap K - Tel Best of the Year 84 compilations we got as a present on graduation day. Anyway, I didn´t care since I could not afford to buy records and Eddy also did the title song for the romantic comedy Romancing the Stone which in Germany was called On the Hunt for the Green Diamond since they could not come up with a good translation.

To make the leap back to Enterprise, Scott Bakula played the ship´s captain Johnathan Archer who also was on the show Quantum Leap as cross dressing Dr. Sam Beckett opposite Dean Stockwell who turns 80.

I never knew they had made a Modesty Blaise movie. And now I know why.

I want to end with a german video which is mainly about the super hefty 75 Years of DC Comics and Donald Duck who is really big in Germany.

New to the blog ? Everything you need to know about TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN : top ten posts / more posts of interest / best of the best

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