Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Science fiction siren Jeri Ryan re - posted !

Today hot sci fi sexbomb Jeri Ryan celebrates her 49th birthday so it is about time to pimp her cult siren entry which I posted two years ago. 


Because as always I went through the list of celebrity birthday posts I had done on this month in previous years and for some reason I didn´t re - post this. And comparing the original Jeri Ryan post with my latest re - post of Star Trek sexbomb Jolene Blalock there really was no competition.

Also there have been a lot of animated Star Trek GIFs added to the blog. Anyway, this is the new version and if you have any information where I can find better Jeri Ryan GIFs or pictures please let me know. Now Star Trek - Voyager stuck Jeri Ryan and her titanic tits in a skin - tight suit in the show after Season 3 as the 36DD drone of Borg Seven of Nine ( or Sex with Nine ). It´s no surprise that it´s the role she´s best known for.


Jeri was one of three reasons to watch the show, and I´m not counting her awesome twin torpedoes and the holographic Doctor as three.


I´m also putting half - klingon sexbomb B´Elanna Torres on the list.


But to tell the truth for me it was mostly hardbody Jeri and her big borg boobies that I could suffer the show because it was so badly written.


She´s the only reason people want to get assimilated - although in this case I´d rather be tittilated, if you catch my drift. I think Harry Kim is probably one of the few males in creation who was afraid to get it on with her. Most others - myself included - would love to have a borgasm with a sex machine ( literally ! ) that´s built like Jeri. And as a cyborg she can take a great deal of punishment and has a lot of endurance. So you don´t have to be gentle and you get a lot of mileage out of this cyber amazon. 


Number 13 on THE 50 SEXIEST SCI FI COSTUMES

Borg - couture is clearly heavily influenced by the science fiction classic Buck Rogers In The Twenty - Fifth Century. Ryan’s ‘ orphaned ’ spandex - clad demi - alien Seven Of  Nine was usually rated 10 by the male fans that the character was clearly put in to attract after a ratings dip.


Ryan only took the role at the fifth attempt by producer Jeri Taylor. A certain contingent of Trekkers took umbrage at the inclusion of a crew - member so overtly sexy in the usually glam - free Trek - verse. The rest of us were busy setting our vcrs as we fell for the oldest trick in the book.


Jeri´s boobs were so huge that they made her skintight suit darker and darker so you couldn´t see them as good but to no avail. Seven of Nine is THE cyborg sex machine every sci fi fanboy wants to assimilate and the only one who could hold a candle to her was Jolene Blalock as T´Pol, the sex massage specialist with the inbuilt automatic Pon Farr nympho mode. 


Jeri Ryan discussed the costume with Trek Today :  The whole ' sex symbol ' or ' babe ' thing doesn't bother me. It's the costume that I wear on the show which is ... a little snug, shall we say, and doesn't leave a whole lot to the imagination. I don't have a problem with it because of the way this character's been written, how intelligent she is and how strong she is and what a wonderful female portrayal she is.


Although there is lot of booty in Star Trek : Uhura in the original series,

the green slave girl which was played by Batgirl Yvonne Craig,


all of Kirk´s girls which he just seemed to find on any planet he was on,


Tasha Yar in Next Generation got android Data to turn on his sex files,


there were also Deanna Troy and Beverly Crusher in Next Generation,


bajoran chief of security Major Kira on Star Trek - Deep Space Nine,


Jadzia Dax on Deep Space Nine ( who had been a man in her last life ),


Ezri Dax on Deep Space Nine ( she was the next incarnation of Jadzia ),


I always brain fart on Chase Masterson who plays Rom´s hot wife Leeta


then the former borg drone Seven of Nine on Star Trek - Voyager


Enterprise´s hasian sexbomb Ensign Hoshi Sato played by Linda Park


or vulcan crew member T´Pol on Enterprise played by Jolene Blalock.


Really, someone at starfleet has a knack for picking hot chicks.


Man, I´d love to do a sandwich with T´Pol and Sex with Nine during the time of Pon Farr. Between the insatiable vulcan nymphomanic sex addict and the inexhaustible cyborg sexdoll you could probably wear yourself out for all time. Not that anybody would complain about going out like that.


Coming back to Jeri Ryan she didn´t get naked on Star Trek - Voyager although there were some scenes in which she was supposedly naked we just didn´t get to see it since there was no full frontal nudity involved.


The best we got were some scenes where we could see her back - but not her butt like with Jolene Blalock in the unforgettable sex massage scenes.


( go to Jolene Blalock´s solo post to read more about her sex massages )

I heard that Kate Mulgrew was constantly bitching because she didn´t get the attention she thought she deserved as star of the show. Okay, let us think about this, there are two women on the show : one a bitchy old broad and one a smoking hot sexborg. Hmm, who gets more attention ?


And let´s be realistic : nobody likes Captain Janeway. Not because she´s a woman. But because she´s frigging crazy. With the other Captains you knew where you stood. Kirk always broke the rules and his crew was the most important thing for him. Picard always obeyed the rules - but his crew was more important. Captain Sisko bended the rules on occassion because he was first stuck out in the middle of nowhere and then he became an emissary of the gods. And in the end he became a god. But Janeway ? One day the rules are the most important thing, the next day she couldn´t care less because it´s Wednesday or that time of the month.


And she didn´t care about her crew at all. They could all kick the bucket as far as she cared. With her as captain your f - word - ed ! Just ask Seven of Nine, she was told by Janeway that she´s nothing but a toaster. Daimn, she can roast my baguette any time she likes if you know what I mean. 


Reading some online threads you could think Jeri Ryan was the first actress on Star Trek who was brought in to sex the show up. But as a matter of fact Marina Sirtis was on tv long before rocking the cleavage and the best parts of some episodes were counselor Troy breathing heavily.


There are even some online rumors - but there´s probably no truth to it - that her role was supposed to be the ship´s telepathic sexdoll. In the first draft Deanna Troy wasn´t the ship´s counselor but rather the " ship´s consolation officer " a orgasmic priestess from the planet Betasex skilled in all known sex techniques to be used by the male crew for stress relief.


Because of their telepathic abilities the women from Betasex were ideal prostitutes and they also had a very high pain threshold and were very resilient so their clients could go for it. Which happened very often when they were working at some mining outpost frequented by sexstarved aliens with dozens of huge reproductive organs or slimy tentacles.

Anyway, that´s just a silly rumor and there´s probably nothing to it. I mean the whole concept would never have passed american tv censors.


What is strange is the fact that for someone who is just supposed to give people advice she wore a pretty sexed up outfit that would totally defeat the purpose of counseling. All her male customers would be thinking about ripping her uniform off and banging her brains out and knowing it would be really uncomfortable. I guess the reason why they only made her kind of telephatic was that if she knew what the male crew members were thinking she couldn´t walk ten feet in the Enterprise and would never visit the bar. Speaking about the bar, if her role was to give people sage advice why did Guinan do basically the same ? So while still unverified the idea of Deanna Troi not only as the ship´s cleavage but also the ship´s adult entertainment system does have its merit. On the other side we know that the holo deck was used for the same thing. It´s so confusing.


What I could verify is that in the original draft Deanna Troy was supposed to have three breast, Tasha Yar had an unhealthy sexual crush on Wesley Crusher and Captain Picard couldn´t help but noticing  the ship´s Doctor Beverly Crusher´s natural walk resembles that of a striptease queen. Oy. Anyway, click here for more GIFs of Doctor Crusher´s and Deanna Troi´s space yoga, The 21 Times Dr. Beverly Crusher Was Your Fashion Idol and last but not least THE VALKYRIE DIRECTIVE takes a more than extensive look at Kira and Dax´s wardrobe through the Deep Space Nine series. 

Of course Jeri starred in other tv shows like Boston Legal for which she did a supersexy photoshoot and even had a scene in which she undressed till she only had a shirt on - which showed much of her fantastic breasts.


I really was lucky to catch that episode because after Ally Mc Beal I really stay away from courtroom drama series. And I prefer to watch James Spader in The Blacklist. What I did see was the Two And A Half Men episode with Jeri. In the episode she plays an old flame of Charlie Sheen who starts a relationship with his brother but he is too obsessed with what happened when she was with Charlie - so he ruins it. Poor guy, I bet she would have spoiled him for all other women on earth. And beyond.


I also caught the episode Queen For A Day from the show Warehouse 13 where Jeri Ryan had a guest role as Peter Lattimer´s ex wife Amanda.


Kate Mulgrew who played Captain Janeway on Star Trek - Voyager was also on the show as Peter´s Mom ( kind of a reunion here although I´m not so sure Kate was so happy to see Jeri again since she was always bitching about Jeri stealing the attention of the viewers away from her ) which didn´t exactly make it easier to watch the show. Not that it isn´t difficult enough to watch the show as they keep changing the time the show is on, then it gets put on a different channel and now they are doing marathons. Some day I´ll just buy all the seasons and binge watch it. 

What I didn´t watch was The O.C. even if was supposed to be for comic people so I didn´t see Jeri in it. And I somehow missed Dracula 2000 which was probably as bad as it sounds so I might have lucked out on this one and the only good parts were the ones with a very busty Jeri Ryan.


I also don´t watch Body Of Proof, another tv series where Jeri Ryan appears but I´m already watching too many crime series as it is. Although judging by the scene from the episode Fallen Angel I may reconsider.


Other shows where Jeri Ryan appeared include The Sentinel, Who´s The Boss ?, Matlock, Leverage and Arrow. I guess that´s everything covered.


Oh, I almost forgot, Seven of Nine was in the only STAR TREK VOYAGER comic I bought called FALSE COLORS. It was a prestige format one shot from Wildstorm and Jim Lee did the variant cover ( I know it´s the variant cover because it was almost impossible to find a picture of the regular ).


The story was written by Star Trek novelist Nathan Archer and the interior art was done by Jeff Moy ( and possibly Phil Moy on backgrounds ) and W. C. Carani, who had a lengthy run on DC´s threeboot LEGIONNAIRES book.


I don´t remember much about the story so it can´t be that impressive but it wasn´t my favorite Star Trek crew either. I only bought it based on the art and I don´t have any idea where it is at the moment so I can´t check how well the comic has held up. But I know I must have it somewhere.


There are no links for this post except this one that I just had to post. I didn´t make this up : 7 bizarre facts about Deanna Troy´s cleavage .

We start the entertainment section with the obligatory birthday greeting for Kyle MacLachlan who turns 58. He has been in everything from Twin Peaks to Desperate Housewives and Marvel´s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. but the reason why I am mentioning his birthday in this post is that he also starred in a little sci fi movie from 1997 called The Hidden. The film is still shown on tv mostly because of the raunchy striptease by Claudia Christian ( with which she secured herself a spot on my personal Top 10 Best Movie Striptease list amongst other silver screen stripper stars like Halle Berry and Erika Eleniak ) who is best known from another sci fi show, Babylon 5 by comic writer J. Michael Strazynski where she plays Commander Susan Ivanova. Although I doubt she wore anything as skimpy as this on it.


In our Dearly Departed section we have Billy Mo whose Ich kauf mir lieber einen Tirolerhut was one of the Schlager we kept playing to keep our spirits up during basic training at the Deutsche Bundeswehr in Munich.



Since it is Jeri Ryan´s birthday - and I already posted her appearances on Craig Ferguson in my first post on her - I went looking for something else. Initially I wanted to post her part from Arrow but then I found this. That´s one of the reasons why I love writing these posts : I never knew this show existed and you get two Star Trek stars for the price of one, Jeri and Wil.



Originally I posted a Power Records edition of Star Trek but then I found Wildstorm´s Star Trek - Voyager : False Colors and changed the video.



Since I have never seen an episode of it I wanted to include the classic Filmation cartoon but I could only find complete episodes in spanish.



Speaking about things I have not seen, I don´t think I have ever watched The Last Starfighter but I have heard only good things about this movie.



New to the blog ? Everything you need to know about TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN : top ten posts / more posts of interest / best of the best


Resistance is futile.

Monday, February 20, 2017

Happy birthday Gail Kim ( not a re - post ) !

Today canadian professional wrestler, wrestling valet, model and actress of korean descent sexbomb Gail Kim - Irvine celebrates her 40th birthday.


Now since I already did a post on wrestling legend Gail Kim last year usually I would consider doing a re - post but since I never got to do the follow up post I promised my readers ( for which I already selected all the material ) here we will have all new stuff which I couldn´t fit into the first post. Yup, this is not Disney´s Marvel so when I tell you something is all - different and all - new you can bet your bottom dollar that it IS stuff you haven´t seen before. Not just a rehashing of old ideas and story lines plus gays.

That also means that I will try not to repeat anything I have written in my last Gail Kim post. So if you want to know more about her just go to the other post. I hope this will make the post a bit shorter and let´s face it, you´re not here to read my musings you want to see Gail Kim in action.


Now as usual I am not up to date on all things wrestling and even moreso than last year. Since my Mom resides here at the moment it has been months since I watched wrestling and even before that I had to make an effort because WWE wrestling has become too much of a dog and pony show - and not in a good way. I mean, what does it say when you would rather watch three episodes of Thunder In Paradise than any episode of a WWE show ? I have to say I started watching more NXT because there is more wrestling and less sports entertainment involved. Even TnA had become like the WWE and the only reason to watch it are the Knockouts.

Which is way better than the WWE´s Divas - which is why they had to restock from the NXT roster. Anyway, most of the GIFs in this post are from last year and I haven´t even watched any TnA wrestling clips through the internet so I don´t know if there still is a TnA wrestling league or if Gail Kim is still active. For all I know she might have become a full time model or an action movie star. On the other hand things might still be going on as usual and she is still having matches against the Dollhouse.


Which I always found a bit boring. If you have been watching wrestling since the 80s this whole " one against a group " thing is kind of done to death. I mean, really, how many times do you have to get your ass kicked before you go for back up ? Anyway, with Today´s wrestling everything turns into a group thing sooner or later. I don´t know, but I have never been someone who tends to be in groups. Even in school I never wanted to be in any cliques - which is how I always ended up with the weirdos and school rejects. For Todays kids this may sound a bit strange but back then you were not cool if you read comics or knew a lot about tv shows.

At least being good at art helped a bit because sooner or later all of your classmates needs a favor that involves drawing something and the girls don´t totally think you´re a creep. Well, at least until they see what you draw. Back to wrestling I always liked it better when it was just one on one like with Gail Kim and Taryn Terell. Those were some epic matches.


I may have already posted this video but before we come to the Gail Kim versus Angelina Love GIFs I think abit of context is needed. We have to keep in mind how Gail Kim returned to TnA wrestling and how Velvet Sky was clobbered by the Karen Jarrett gang on a regular basis. I don´t think she got any help from her old Beautiful People ex - partner at that time.



No, you really can´t say that Angelina Love is a nice person although she has two 34E arguments that are 100 percent certified crowd pleasers.


Speaking of Angelina´s love balls am I the only one who thinks it´s a bit hypocritical to have a special move called the implant buster when you are walking around with some obvious enhancement in that area yourself ?


I am adding a few wrestling videos although I know that most of them will probably be deleted until next year. On the other side what good is it to bookmark them if I don´t put them on the blog when I have the chance ? There are a few I will save for other posts where Gail Kim fights other female wrestlers about whom I have already written in the past. But apart from them there will be quite a number of wrestling videos on this post.



Now Gail Kim´s feud with Brooke Tessmacher ( somebody at TnA wrestling must have been a big fan of the Richard Donner Superman movies ) must have been around the time when they still showed TnA on german tv because I remember watching them in the living room with my brother.


At this point you have probably seen enough hot women beat the stuffing out of each other so I want to close the post - or at least this part of it - with a happy Gail Kim. Well, Gail Kim in a bikini always makes me happy !


This first video is a compilation which I decided to include at the last minute because you won´t find these Gail Kim moments anywhere in GIF form and I don´t have the necessary time to make them all myself. But if there is anybody out there who has enough free time on my hands be my guest and most importantly send me an e - mail or link when you are done.



The second one is from a photo shoot Gail did for Muscle & Fitness, a magazine I used to buy on and off when I was a regular commuter. Some reading material you only buy when you see it at a newsstand and if you don´t frequent one a few times a week you just stop. I used to buy this and the special IRONMAN issues for the swimsuit pictures - a lot of them with swimsuit models that later became Divas like Trish Stratus or Tylene Buck - but that dried down with the rise of the internet. I still have the IRONMAN Swimsuit Special videos somewhere and one of these days I have to find an internet store where you can get them on DVD. Those were awesome and much better than anything related to wrestling Divas.



I added this section after I had put all the material in that was original intended to go on the post because it´s kind of a throwback to the last Gail Kim post. Longtime readers might remember I mentioned that Jade from the Dollhouse had the potential to be more than just a background character if she was willing to bring her qualities more to the foreground.


Well it seems I was not the only one who thought along those lines as other people seem to have noticed Jade a.k.a. Mia Yim´s ... I was going to try to avoid the term porn star qualities because of the racial stereotype that all asian women are natural born deepthroating nymphomaniacs, genetically engineered through centuries of prostitution as perfect blow up sex dolls to make males squirt their brains out but when a woman has arse antlers I stop arguing. A tattoo is something you get not something that happens to you and it´s not called tramp stamp without a reason. 


Her asian predestination as a porn star notwithstanding Jade decided to try her luck in the squared circle before taming well hung potent studs for a living. Besides her superior oriental sex techniques she has a background in Muay Thai as well as in lucha libre which was very helpful in becoming the new Knockout champion. At least for a time but I don´t know if she is currently still the champ. She definitely has the fighting abilities, a tireless hardbody and that natural korean flexibility that is helpful in both camps.


And to show you that she´s not only a freak in the bed but also knows how to wrestle here´s her first title defense against Madison Rayne.



What started out as just a short post has become longer and longer so I am going to wrap up things. Which means that I don´t have time to go trough all of my bookmarks but I still want to share a few links that I came across while looking for the site where I usually get my wrestling clips ( only to find out that it is completely outdated - like me ) with my readers. I am very careful with what I share on the blog because I don´t want to put anything out there that´s NSFW but with these I think I am safe. As I don´t know when I will have the chance to do my next wrestling related post here are the links for a hot GIF of Taryn Terell from her Playboy days , more Gail Kim vs Dollhouse GIFs and for more high quality wrestling GIFs than you can shake a stick at go to the WHATEVER I FEEL LIKE tumblr.

Our first celebrity birthday is musical super star Rihanna who turns 29. I think I had some posts on her on the old blog but so far I haven´t found the time for it. Also I am not current on all things Rihanna ( like what´s the name of her latest music video ) since I don´t watch much music television lately and I don´t have a video bookmarked so we leave that for a later date. For now here is a GIF from her almost wardrobe malfunction at SNL - I posted a link to a high quality version of this in an earlier post.


Apropos, I could have sworn that I mentioned singing sexbomb Ophélie Winter who celebrates her 43rd birthday in an earlier post because she was one of the candidates for the french superheroine Crimson Fox from my Casting the Justice League of America movie posts but it seems I must´ve replaced her with someone else when I overhauled these posts.


This is the first video I saw of Ophelie Shame On You ( it was around the time when we first could watch french tv through the tv cable so I was always zapping through the french tv stations when I was channel surfing and I only caught the second half of it which was still better than having nothing ) which made a very big impression on me and I chose the english language version of the song because it is the one with the best quality.



And we are staying in that time period - although not on the continent - because that´s when Cindy Crawford became one of the first supermodels ever. It´s hard to believe that she turns 51. How time flies. I went on the internet to look for an iconic image of her that was safe to post but I had no idea what I was looking for. Once I saw this picture it all came back.


I really was convinced I had to put Sidney Poitier in the Dearly Departed section and was very relieved to find out that he is alive and celebrating his 90th birthday. With the huge lists of celebrities we lost last year I may be forgiven this oversight. I wanted to post In The Heat Of The Night but since I could not find it - or any of his other movies - in good quality ( I was desperately trying to find Let´s Do It Again with Bill Cosby which was arguably not one of his best movies but one I must have watched more than a hundred times as a kid growing up ) here are his top five films.



Definitely no longer with us is Dwayne McDuffy, best known for his work on the animated Justice League cartoons ( anyone who reads this and only knows the recent Justice League Action cartoons do yourself a favor and seek them out ) and the Milestone universe titles like Hardware, Icon or Static Shock. I remember that when these comics first came out I didn´t pay it much attention since I thought that as a white man ( even one with spanish roots ) I was clearly not their intended target audience and I also was more interested in the mainstream superhero comics.


But just a few months ago I found a lot of these Milestone issues for a really low price and since you can practically get them for peanuts at most comic shops I wanted to know if they are worth reading. I think I got to mention this comic haul on the blog although I still haven´t found the time to do a review of them. So instead of the Justice League Unlimited extra with Mark Hamill I wanted to post ( and which you can find pretty easily on YouTube ) or an episode of the Static Shock cartoon ( which I missed completely and of which you can´t find any complete episodes ) here is the History of Icon - who has a few similarities to Superman.



Speaking of icons, Today is also the anniversary of movie maker Andy Sidaris but since I just did a post on Dona Speir a few days back - just like last year - I am not going to make a special post since I already did one and I don´t think that there is anything I haven´t covered in previous posts.


Which brings us to the final video which is dedicated to german comedy bedrock Heinz Erhardt. In my last Gail Kim post I posted a trailer for Karl May´s The Oil Prince because he has a small part in it but this time I am posting the first part of a Heinz Erhardt special. Which is due to the fact that I could not find any of his movies in good quality but he was always better in front of a live audience anyway. Like reciting short funny poems or the hilarious sketch where each word has to begin with the letter g.



New to the blog ? Everything you need to know about TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN : top ten posts / more posts of interest / best of the best


They call me Mister Tibbs und dergleichen !