Monday, August 28, 2017

Comics Master Monday with Jack Kirby !

I still haven´t worked through my backlog of unfinished posts but after re - writing my last post three times to eliminate most of the inappropriate stuff about Yaya Han I wanted to work on something new. And since Today is Jack Kirby´s 100th anniversary I decided to pay homage to the King.


As longtime readers know Jack Kirby has been popping up in a lot of posts on this blog, from my feature post on Big Barda ( which I mentioned two posts ago in my TEAM  - UP THURSDAY WITH JOHN ROMITA JR. ) to my special THORSDAY posts about issues 171 ( part 1 / part 2 ) and 173 ( part 1 / part 2 ) where I found the german black and white pages of the issues from Williams and a THORSDAY post on Vince Coletta´s birthday with a special focus on the horrible re -  coloring of Disney´s re - issuing of TALES OF ASGARD in an omnibus edition that obstructs almost all of Kirby´s art. 


Last year I did a feature on Jack Kirby´s CAPTAIN VICTORY series but this year I could not settle on one specific series so I decided to take a page out of our friend Old Groove over at DIVERSIONS OF THE GROOVY KIND and do an overview of all his different works. Although as regular readers of this blog know I like to put my own spin on things so my selection is not only highly subjective - including favorite series as well as favorite images - I also tried to include a lot of original art pages for your enjoyment.


Now I have gotten some comments about the lack of links in some posts which has two reasons. If it´s somebody about which I have already done a lot of posts - like Jack Kirby in this instance - then I simply run out of links. If I don´t save some for a certain post I hope to do in the future.

And lately I have been too busy trying to continue with the blog to check out other blogs so there are only those links added to my list upon which I come during my research for these post. I hope my readers can give me some leeway here. Today we have only one missed comic related post, the great Mike Kaluta. I did a post on him last year and I don´t have the time - or the pictures - to do a post worthy of him. Maybe I can do one later.


Charisma Carpenter just keeps popping up in these posts. She was in the aforementioned John Romita Jr birthday post and I also mentioned her in my last post in regards to Steve Guttenberg´s birthday since they were both on Veronica Mars. I later decided to cut it - along with a lot of NSFW stuff about Yaya Han - because I didn´t want to put her in every post. I know that every post is potentially somebody´s first but I don´t want to bore those readers that read more than one post. But since it has been one post and eleven days since that I think it´s okay to bring her up again.


Yesterday Aaron Paul turned 38 best known as Heisenberg´s sidekick from Breaking Bad which is really as fantastic as everybody tells you. Now before his big break Aaron Paul starred in Veronica Mars alongside cult tv sexbomb Charisma Carpenter who is best known as Cordelia Chase on Buffy and the spin off Angel which Today´s kids may not know so they missed a lot of scorching bikini scenes with Charisma´s big 34D boobs.


One of these days I´ll have to get the first season of Veronica Mars to find out how it all started since I came in at the tailend of that season - as usual. Besides Veronica Mars Charisma Carpenter was also in episode 11 of season 5 of Burn Notice where she showed she still can deliver the goods.


In Germany only the first three seasons of Burn Notice have come out on DVD and right now I´m halfway through season 2. I´m not sure if I should wait any longer to see if they will do the rest someday or just get them through imports. Now that I´m invested I want to know how it plays out and there is even a spin off with Bruce Campbell´s character Sam. In any case Charisma´s funbags alone are worth the price of admission . Daimn!



We also had Barbara Bach ´s 70th birthday, who was a Bond girl in The Spy Who Loved Me. I made this GIF myself which took me at least an hour but I wanted to include one where you can see her face not just her boobs.


Which must be quite distracting because she constantly gets mixed up with Catherine Bach best known for playing Daisy Duke on The Dukes of Hazard ( and also for inventing the cut off jeans of the same name ).


Barbara´s most famous scene is from Up The Academy, in fact her part in it is probably the only reason the movie is still shown on tv. I didn´t say that she´s best known for it because it seems people were again not looking at Barbara´s face because it is often credited to Kelly McGillis.


Today´s birthdays start with Kelly Overton who turns 39 and is famous for showing off her butt cleavage in Tekken. I have also included two new GIFs so you can see her face and fully appreciate her dancing skills. If you take the correlation between the way a woman dances and how she is in the bedroom into consideration Kelly must be a real sex freak in the bed.


Another throwback - although only to the John Romita Jr post - is Jason Priestley who is turning 48 and who is off course best known for playing Brandon Walsh on cult tv show Beverly Hill 90210 and how troubling is it that I know that off the top of my hat ? We know he also banged co star Tori Spelling´s brains out but who can blame him if she showed off her stripper moves dancing in a hooker outfit which - as baffling as it may sound - I mentioned in a birthday post about Tiffani Amber Thiessen.


If you can call her wild fertility inducing movements dancing. She really was just shaking her big boobs in the general direction of the camera. But that she did very effectively. I never was a big Tori Spelling fan but in that scene she really squeezed her DD breast into a tight leather top and just pushed them straight in your face. Now that´s what I call entertainment.


I started watching Beverly Hills 90210 on the basis of Tori´s growing boobs which was a product of her Dad´s financed surgery and Tiffany Amber Thiessen ´s exploding chest which was a product of mother nature. It helped a lot that Tiffany was often in bikinis or leather hooker outfits.


Speaking about hookers, besides appearing on Beverly Hills 90210 Tiffani also was on Saved by the Bell with Elizabeth Berkley who revealed her real stripper nature in Showgirls. The movie was called a flop when it first come out but in the meantime it has become a cult classic mainly based on Elizabeth´s stripper moves which left me no other chance than cast her as one of my alternate choices for the Nympho Supergirl from Earth XXX in my second alternatives post for casting the Justice League movie .


But double jointed Elizabeth not only licks the chrome off your steelhard pole she has the all important " pumping pelvic thrust " move down to pat.


I bet that comes in handy with that portable casting couch she allegedly has and I would not mind being at the receiving end of that a few hours.


Okay, coming back to Jason Priestley after this ultimate sex goddess trifecta he also appeared in an episode of The Highwayman and did the voices of Jack McCyber in Biker Mice From Mars and Legion member Reed Daggle also known as Chameleon Boy in Superman The Animated Series.

Speaking of science fiction series, Amanda Tapping celebates her 52nd birthday and she´s best known as Samantha Carter on Stargate. I wonder if Roland Emmerich had any idea how successful this franchise would be when he made the first movie all these decades ago. During the course of the series Amanda did a pretty good job of hiding the centerfold body every sci fi fan would love to be tapping I would say. Hellooo, nurse !


Speaking of centerfold bodies, country megastar Shania Twain also turns 52 and her best video is without a doubt Man, I Feel Like A Woman because you know you got a hot video on your hands when Mtv feels the need to censor it. Originally I wanted to make my own GIF but thankfully I found the one below although I have no idea from which live performance it is. Maybe one of my readers can help me out in the comment section.


I always found her song That Don´t Impress Me Much very hypocritical because first she lists all these things that according to her are not the way to impress her like good looks, a fancy car, money or a job with a certain social status and then she went and married her producer who probably had all of the above. Plus he could help her in her musical career. Which teaches us that if women say that certain things don´t impress them they mean these things alone. BUT if you have these things coupled with something they can profit from it´s a whole new ball game amigo.



Daimn, when I see Brooklin in the preview picture I´m more convinced then ever that she needs to marry me. To quote my favorite Sledge Hammer episode : " She will be a wife AND a mistress. " I have made no GIFs for the video but you can look forward to others where Brooklin´s parts are not for the faint of heart and get a grip - she is already 19 !


You can always rely on NerdSync to make topnotch videos for the important comic anniversaries that distill such things like the hidden genius of Jack Kirby to school comic book newbies and afficionados alike.



This has nothing to do with Jack Kirby but it is the coolest thing I have seen recently so I wanted to post it as soon as possible. I have no idea if this was just produced for a promotion or if there is an actual upcoming movie but I love it. And for those who don´t know Ninjak or the Valiant universe google it. I have written about their books a few times ( and hope to do a few times more once I am caught up on Archer & Armstrong ) and they are currently publishing some of the best comics out there.



We are closing out the post with some old school cartoons of Captain America that adapts a few Avengers stories - because the Avengers didn´t have their own cartoon show. So they kept popping up in Hulk and other shows. I love that the Swordsman immediately decides that the Scarlett Witch is too hot to get killed. And yes, her name was Wand Maximoff back then before some guy at Disney decided in a harebrain attempt to sever her ties to mutants and that Magneto was not her real father. Don´t let them con you, Magneto is her Daddy ! Guess what, Swordsman. Captain America is too savy to fall for the old booby trap ( that one gets me every time - as you have no doubt guessed from the entertainment block ).



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Gone ! Gone ! - - the form of man - - Rise, the Demon Etrigan !

Thursday, August 24, 2017

It´s a Team - Up Thursday with Jim Aparo

Today would have been Jim Aparo´s 85th birthday so in honor of THE definitive Batman artist - at least as far as I am concerned I want to pay homage. And since our last post was a TEAM - UP THURSDAY I thought : Why not continue with it, maybe we can make it a thing like my FLASH FRIDAY posts ? Back when I had what resembled a normal posting schedule.


Originally I wanted to do another special OUTSIDERS post because I just read the latest issue of DOLMEN ( a great spanish comic fanzine I have mentioned once or twice ) and there was an article about how social and politic issues were handled by Marvel in the 1970s compared to now.

Well, the resume was that back then comics WERE better because even if those issues were sometimes handled in a hamfisted way ( everybody remembers the infamous issue 83 of the Avengers " The Revolution´s fine " ) at least they dared to talk about those topics. I mean, now we have a black Captain America but for what ? Back when Sam Wilson was the Falcon he did more to fight against racism, bigotry and poverty than now. How much has becoming a different hero helped him in making a difference in the neighbourhood where he grew up ? And what´s the use of black characters in comics when they don´t talk about the problems they still face in Today´s society ? Some readers take exception if a hero like Rage is introduced into the Avengers - or later on Triathlon - who seem one dimensional and only there to talk about those issues. And it can be boring if that´s what they are all about. But a good writer can do that AND give them a personality, not make them all about those issues.


Marvel was trying to sell us their brand of diversity for the longest time before sales crashed but what good is diversity in members of a super hero team if they still behave like a bunch of white, caucasian males ?

So I wanted to do a special OUTSIDERS post showcasing some of the issues they tackled which comic companies wouldn´t touch nowadays with a ten foot pole like racism, apartheid, slavery, drugs, religious cults, rebellious teenagers who run away from home, fertility problems and so on but then I would have used up most of my good OUTSIDERS stuff by Jim Aparo. So since we did a TEAM - UP THURSDAY post last week and Jim Aparo was one of the main artists on one of the best known team - up books in the history of comics ( of which the third hardcover collection finally comes out on September the 19th ) I decided to post some black and white art.  


Now I also didn´t want to use up all my good BRAVE AND THE BOLD black and white are so this post will not be just about the team - up books or team - up stories Jim Aparo drew. I have tried to represent the entire range of titles on which he worked on and as usual this selection is highly subjective including my favorite books. As it is your mileage may vary.


Now I still wanted to include the Outsiders and since this is a team - up post I am including some pages from one of my favorite team - up issues ever BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS 5 which was the continuation of a story that began in NEW TEEN TITANS 37. I have this issue in the german version as BATMAN SONDERHEFT 35, at least twice in the original version, as part of the first BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS hardcover collection ( I hope they reprint the whole series continuing with OUTSIDERS and the Alan Davis issues ) and I have to admit it´s my favorite issue included in the second TEEN TITANS by GEORGE PEREZ AND MARV WOLFMAN omnibus.


Here are the rest of the pages I have selected and Jim Aparo has really worked on a lot of iconic and historic series and stories. Which is not surprising since he worked on a lot of series. Including the LEGION OF SUPER - HEROES even if he only did a cover for them. Man, it would have ruled so much if he ever had done some interior work for the Legion.


Today we have only one link that fits the theme of the post from the PENCIL INK blog which has the cover of The Brave and the Bold 153 by Jim Aparo and an interior page by the great Don Newton. So without further ado we come to the birthdays I missed but covered in previous years - as regular readers of the post already know - and the first one is french cult siren ( quite literally since she has a captivating singing voice ) Alizée for whom I made a post with her best animated GIFs, videos and some info.


Continuing Terry Austin and Alfredo Alcala had to share a post and I didn´t really miss it but you still might want to check out last year´s Jim Aparo birthday post which is about the first issues of Batman and the Outsiders.

Since I actually started writing this post Yesterday I want to include a celebrity birthday from August the 23rd namely australian musician / actor Rick Springfield who turned 68. He was on the first Human Target tv series and on High Tide which I watched religiously because it was a full on babe parade as it had plenty sexbombs guest starring of the caliber of Deborah Shelton, Denise Richards, Lucy Lawless, Tanya Roberts, Tracy Scoggins, Krista Allen, Donna D´Errico, Paula Trickey, Julie Benz, Rochelle Swanson ( who upgrades every movie she stars in with her steamy performances like On The Border or Secret Games 3 and her erotic thriller Mutual Needs is a must see ! ), Shae Marks ( best known for her role in the Andy Sidaris movies Day Of The Warrior and Return To Savage Beach ) or Lisa Boyle .

 
Now the reason why I included him in this post is that on August 6th Lisa Boyle turned 53 and I had her in my last post but had to cut her because otherwise it would have been too long. So I´m including her Today and I have to call foul on her imdb entry that states she is best known for her roles in Bad Boys, Face / Off, Lost Highway or The Nutty Professor. I did not even know she was in those movies. No, if you know Lisa Boyle it´s either from her pictures in PLAYBOY and the over 25 Playboy magazine Special Editions where she was often paired with Patricia Ford, erotic classics like Midnight Tease, Dreammaster - The Erotic Invader and I Like To Play Games Too or from her recurring role on Married With Children.


She played Fawn, one of Kelly´s bosom buddies - with a huge emphasis on the bosom part - and constantly outshone Christina Applegate like in this scene from the episode Spring Break - Part 1 from season 10 where she really pushed her 35Cs so tightly together in her tiny red bikini top when she´s leaning forward that I totally forgot that Christina was in the shot. 


From all of Lisa Boyle´s famous midnight specials I selected Friend of the Family which is the erotic version of Down and Out in Beverly Hills where Shauna O´Brien plays the part of Nick Nolte. She´s the sister of an old friend of the family and during her visit she acts as a sexual catalyst to get the family out of their relationship problems. Lisa plays the rebellious, nymphomanic daughter who gets off on driving her mother crazy by having wild sex - preferably in her Mom´s car. Which is the perfect role for Lisa.



James Caan celebrated his 41st birthday Yesterday and Today it´s Hawaii Five - O co star Alex O´Loughlin´s turn to pass the big four so I want to post a video with both of them. Last year I posted this interview with ET Canada so those that missed it might want to go back to last year´s post.

There is also a longer video with the full version of the interview without the tv clips. The quality is not as good as with the first video but you get to see more of Erin. There´s also an interview transcript with lots of animated GIFs as it seems I´m not the only one smitten with Erin Cebula.


I am not up to date with the episodes on german tv because they were on at the same time as another show. I have completely lost track and will have to catch up on the DVDs. Since I have already missed two birthdays from Hawaii Five - O cast members here is a video with the main cast for those readers that have not seen an episode yet to wet their appetite.



We continue with celebrities I already mentioned in earlier posts or had to cut from my last post as Steve Guttenberg celebrates his 59th birthday. He is best known to Today´s audience for playing corrupt town mayor Woody Goodman on Veronica Mars. While Steve has starred in a plethora of comedies in the 80s and 90s for people from my generation he is Officer Mahoney in the Police Academy movies ( link for Joel Stice´s 10 things you might not know about Police Academy on it´s 30th anniversary ).


After the second part the films became worse with every sequel but were still worth watching for some hot sexbombs like real life Power Girl Leslie Easterbrook who had the most famous scene in Police Academy 4 - Citizens on Patrol in which she emerges from a pool in a wet t - shirt .


She also has a spin - off post that is re - posted most years that used to be in one post together with Janet Jones Gretzky who starred alongside her in Police Academy 5 and Becky Mullen but I had to put it in three separate post because I upgraded it with a lot of animated GIFs. I also wanted to do a new version of Leslie´s post as well as Becky Mullen´s post from last year because there is some new material I already prepared in advance to add.


The post also included 80s cult siren Monique Sluyter and the Tutti Frutti girls but that part got too long and I had to give it a post of its own which I re - posted last year in a new and better version . She was a candidate from my Justice League of America casting series - I cast her as Fire a.k.a. Beatriz da Costa in the Andy Sidaris Special - and before getting her solo post she was also regularly mentioned in the annual re - posts of italian mega soccer MILF Simona Ventura . I wanted to do a new version of her post since there was some new stuff that I wanted to add to it so I´ll have to see if I can get around to do it before her next birthday comes around.


Russ Meyer actress Raven De La Croix turns 70 so I´m adding the part with Uschi Digard I cut from an earlier post. On Halle Berry´s birthday, August 14th the illegitimate child of Russ Meyer and Andy Sidaris, Jim Wynorski celebrated his 67th birthday and among his cineastic oeuvre are such classics like Dinosaur Island, Not Of This Earth with Traci Lords and The Lost Empire with Raven De La Croix. I wrote a bit more about the last one ( and posted two videos ) in my first Justice League Casting Alternates .


On August the 15th world famous Uschi Digard turned 67 and the question is, how does one discuss Uschi ? The extremely busty, tan, always smiling, and endearing on - screen personality appeared in so many films of the 60s and 70s that the litany of her screen credits is only rivaled by the number of aliases she worked under like Ann Biggs, Ushie Plushie or Linda Lolli.

I don´t want to say that Busenwunder Uschi was predestined to work in skin flicks ( you can ask any german guy which word rhymes with Uschi ) but she began to develop extremely big breasts at a very young age. In an interview Uschi recalls : " When I started to develop at 11 I had to strap myself in, because it wasn't seemly to have breasts, and we all wore uniforms. By age 15 I was already a 40DD. " After such a beginning Uschi could only end up in movies but she began, oddly enough, in mainstream, with a cameo in I Love You Alice B. Toklas ! with Peter Sellers. She would do other bits in Hollywood flicks like The Killer Elite, Fuzz and Kentucky Fried Movie in the fake Catholic High School Girls in Trouble trailer. 
  
After supporting parts in Cresse's The Scavengers and a handful of other productions and taking the men’s magazine scene by storm, Uschi Digard made her Meyer debut as the best thing about Cherry, Harry & Raquel !


A silent role in footage added to pad out the picture, she is one of the more memorable aspect of that lesser Meyer movie together with the lascivious Linda Ashton who plays the main character, nurse Cherry.
 

 
I need sexual healing from a nurse like Stacy Valentine where no matter how much she knows about medicine you feel already better if you see her. If I won the lottery I would definitely hold auditions for my nurse and I would buy them uniforms that are at least two sizes too small so their tits are hanging out all the time. Of course my dream nurse would not only need the body of a Playmate of the Year and incredible stripper skills.


She also should be well versed in Kamasutra, tantra sex, nuru massages and all sex techniques. The best candidate would be a big breasted nymphomanic sexbomb with legs up to her chin who is addicted to oral sex. She was fired from her last job at a sperm bank because she massaged the clients with her giant boobs and deepthroated them so they squirted in her throat instead of the container. Maybe Yaya Han wants to apply.


I mean she already did a sexy doctor / nurse cosplay with her Super Sonico costume. Daim, that girl knows how to fill a uniform and I bet her fiancee was only too eager to play Doctor. Hashtag " luckiestguyontheplanet ".


Not only does Yaya Han look like she could star in a Russ Meyer movie Super Sonico sounds like a name from a Russ Meyer movie, especially Supervixens where every woman had the word super in her name. Although it would probably be something a bit more like Super Spermico.


Now while I intellectually know that Yaya Han will never be in a movie like the ones Russ Meyer produced things are not so bleak for a nude scene in an Andy Sidaris like movie. You say that´s crazy ? Maybe not so much.


First off, she already did an interview in PLAYBOY and now that they have come to their senses and include nude pictures again maybe Yaya wants to do a pictorial while her body is at its peak condition. Second, Yaya Han is definitely going in the direction of movies even if she might start out in smaller roles. She has done longer and more elaborated skits at cosplay events as well as guest starred on tv shows and was one of the main attractions of Heroes of Cosplay so maybe she is ready to take the next step. And third and most important, her spectacular body was literally made for it. Which is not a racial stereotype, just stating the fact that she had some extreme asian augmentation and got herself giant porn implants.


By the way, speaking of hasian sexbombs and plastic surgery, KPOPMAP has a list of the 7 Hottest Female Idols ( meaning k - pop singers ) Who Don´t Need A Boob Job with some nice animated GIFs of said k - pop singers.


People always say I exaggerate with Yaya Han´s breastsize but according to internet sources she´s a 40D - which to tell the truth does not tell me that much. So she is a 40D but then her cupsize is 36D ? How does this work ? I know that women wear shoes two sizes too small but I would think with breast you would pick a bra that fits, right ? That´s confusing.


Anyway, the consensus seems to be 40D with Yaya Han on most internet pages. Now in centimeters that is 102 which means that keeping in mind she´s only 5 foot 1 ( 155 centimeters, about my height ) most porn stars don´t measure up. I remember there was a girl in PLAYBOY when I was in middel school who was the same height as Yaya Han and she only had a 95 centimeter bust but because of her height she looked like she could easily star in a Russ Meyer movie. And Yaya got 7 centimeters more of boobs !

 
So far I have only made four solo posts on her although I keep mentioning her on various JLA casting posts and any other involving asian sexbombs like Ava Cadell, Kiana Tom, Akira Lane, Miko Lee, Gail Kim or Minka and I swear the completely SFW BIG YAYA HAN POST is still in the pipeline.


Coming back to Uschi, from 1969, she didn't stop working and encountered just about every major producer and director of the sexploitation scene.

She even worked in hardcore productions but she only appeared in soft scenes. Everyone who worked with Uschi loved her, a rarity in the sexploitation industry, and it's no surprise that she kept many of her co - workers as close friends for many years. Uschi worked with Russ behind - the - scenes more frequently than she did on - camera, acting as associate producer on Meyer's last two films, Up ! and Beneath The Valley of The Ultra - Vixens, before he worked her last nerve and she stormed out of his life for a spell( as he forced many of his friends to do around this time ).


Before that, she had maybe her all - time best role as SuperSoul, Stuart Lancaster's Austrian mail - order bride who bangs him all over Lancaster's farm ( with loud exaggerated panting and in ludicrous positions ! ), then sets her eyes on Charles Pitts. You get to hear Uschi speak in german here ( one of the multitude of languages she speaks fluently along with italian and spanish ) and her knack for comedy is undeniable; she also plays a nude telephone operator who speaks in Dutch ! Another no - show in Jimmy McDonough's Russ Meyer tome, Uschi has apparently disappeared.

Though Uschi was a public figure on the Internet back in the late 1990s, selling autographed photos from her own website, the page promptly disappeared a few years later and none of her co - stars, directors or close friends have been able to find her! Wherever Uschi is, I hope she is living well and is very happy and content, because she doubtlessly deserves it.



I´m a horrible person. The Stuttgart ComicCon 2017 was not even two months ago and already I´m breaking all my resolutions to write less offensive stuff about Yaya Han and dial down the asian oversexualisation.


I really tried but in my defense I have to say that since my Mom returned she is binge watching Game of Vikings and the constant assault of people getting maimed, killed, decapitated and raped might have lead to a slight overreaction. At this point all I can do is apologize to Yaya Han and say that it´s all asian admiration. Since I posted quite a number of pictures from her Super Sonico cosplay it´s only fitting to include a video of it.



Since I have the slight feeling I might have posted the Super Sonico video before I´m including a second one. And just so you can see that it´s no overexaggeration on my part it´s one where Yaya is wearing no cosplay corsages or push up bras and she still is stretching her shirt to the limit.



Usually I include a Hyuna video after a Yaya Han video but since I posted the animated GIF of Kyungri from Nine Muses as one of the hottest k - pop singers who don´t need a boob job it´s only fair to show her in action. I don´t know why it is called adult ceremony but there is probably a reason.



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By the beard of Poseidon !