Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Retro repost : cult siren Erika Eleniak

Today busty Baywatch beach body par excellence Erika Eleniak celebrates her 47th birthday so I thought it´s high time to re - post her. She has been in a lot of movies but she´s probably most famous for her sexy striptease in UNDER SIEGE which is what this post will be focusing on.

Which is also one of the reasons why I didn´t do a post about her sooner. Now longtime readers will already know that her striptease is on my Top Ten list of movie stripteases. I know, maybe it´s not on the official Top Ten or your personal Top Ten but it sure as hell is on mine. And one of my goals has been to do at least one post about all the entries on my list.

I also already had written a post about this on my old boob blog that´s probably still out there. Now you might ask yourself where the problem lies. Well, the thing is that I try to keep the post safe for work and most the pictures I had of Erika Eleniak were full frontal nudity or at least with a lot of exposed breast. Not that I have a problem with that. But like I said, I tried to keep the post safe for work and how should I do a post about a particular scene when I can´t post any pictures ? I know that it is totally doable since there are also other pictures from the movie but for me this would feel too much of a tease. I always hated it when writers put scenes in comics that involved nudity well knowing that the artist were never allowed to draw them and had to come up with a way to make it work. Which always never works. Because comics are a visual medium and if you fail to bring a visual gag over in a visual medium you have definitely failed. Whenever I read such a scene I was seriously ticked off.

So you might ask why I´m doing this post. Well, to tell the truth I have blogger and myself to thank for this. Since I figured out how to make screenshots I´m not depending on other people´s screenshots and I can do my own which are not that risky. Okay, some of them may be and I´ll probably include one shot of Erika Eleniak in all her stripper glory but only for scientific reasons, I promise. I also have already posted some pictures without having any reader complaints so I´m keeping my fingers crossed.

The other reason for doing such a post and hoping to keep it safe for work is that blogger now allows to post animated GIFs. So far the posting of GIFs was possible but you ran into trouble because blogger didn´t show it right. But now that´s possible so instead of filling this post with dozens of risky screenshots I can just post one GIF of her striptease and if readers have a problem with that they can just quickly scroll over it.

With all this in mind you might ask why I still feel the need to do this post. Well, this blog is also about giving tribute to all the neglected or forgotten cult sirens out there who bare it all ( so to speak ) to turn unbearable dreck into fun trash and who never get top billing or awards.

They never get credit or the big bucks but nevertheless they work hard and are prepared to show it all - unlike some actresses who are extremely hot but who will never get naked on screen - just so we can get a little something from awful movies that otherwise would be a waste of time.

And it´s not like I haven´t posted about hot sexbombs before. I did two entire posts about Baywatch colleague Traci Bingham ( a.k.a. Traci Banghim ) one of which included a lot of animated GIFs from Janet Jackson´s hottest wardrobe malfunction on Jay Leno´s Tonight Show ,

more than one post about cult sirens Markie Post and Heather Thomas , at least two about Jamie Lee Curtis sexy striptease on TRUE LIES ( one just for all the screenshots, this was before I could post animated GIFs ), also two on Salma Hayek with one mentioning her striptease on FROM DUSK TILL DAWN, one on Janet Jones and Leslie Easterbrook´s wet t - shirt on POLICE ACADEMY , one on fitness sexbomb Kiana Tom´s exposed bra on UNIVERSAL SOLDIER - THE RETURN, more than three about Wonder Woman Lynda Carter as well as italian soccer MILF extraordinaire Simona Ventura, Mistress of the Dark Elvira, Russ Meyer cult actress Tura Satana and I wrote about dozens of others including Joyce Hyser from the almost forgotten screwball comedy JUST ONE OF THE GUYS where I just had to include some full frontal. Anyway, the list is far too long to post here but you get an idea this kind of post is not unprecedented on this blog.

I just hope I don´t loose too many readers because of this. Although with the numbers of daily hits I have been getting lately I´m not sure if it could really do any harm. Things sure have gotten strange on this blog. I don´t know if it´s a matter of the topics I write about but lately things have gone from around 100 to 150 comments a day to five a week. Okay, most of them were just spam anyway and it´s kind of nice not having to spend hours every day deleting them but now I have almost no feedback. And the daily hits have dropped from almost 3.000 a day - sometimes even going over that - to barely above 750. I don´t know why that is but in the meantime I will soldier on. I promise. And if you have some time drop me a comment even if it´s only to show me that it still works.

Today´s only comic book related thing is that I cast Erika Eleniak for the role Hawkgirl in my Justice League movie, a topic that I hope to further elaborate on one of these days. If readers want to see that happening.

Anyway, that enough public announcement stuff so after a rather long winded intro let´s hear it for celebrity birthday babe Erika Eleniak :

Originally posted on Wednesday, March 25th, 2009

Retro babe of the week : Erika Eleniak strips on Under Siege

Time for a dive into the vault for some awsome striptease goodness courtesy of the ever so popular RETRO BABE OF THE WEEK series. Today´s contestant is playmate and Baywatch babe Erika Eleniak whose claim to blow up sex doll fame is her incredibly hot striptease on UNDER SIEGE .

Erika started on Baywatch where in one of the first episodes she got into trouble because of some raunchy pictures of her that were published.

Which at that time didn´t make much sense because her breasts were rather average and only grew to the enormous size she has been known for ever since in later episodes of one of the most successful series on the planet. I bet David Hasselhoff wished he had known this before.

So Erika Eleniak became the " queen of the mountain " on Baywatch with the biggest boobs around ...... until Pamela Anderson came around.

Like Pamela Anderson she also appeared in Playboy and was the playmate of July 1989 although I´m not sure if the pictures where she wore part of a uniform much like the one she wears in her famous striptease got her the role on Under Siege. Anyway, Erika was only the first of a decades spanning tradition of Baywatch babes who got photographed by Playboy like Vanessa Angel, Krista Allen, playmate / Penthouse pet / pornstar Teri Weigel, Jenny Mc Carthy, Jasmine Bleeth, Donna D´Erico, Kelly Monaco, Brande Roderick, Nicole Eggert , Mitzi Capture and Gina Lee Nolin among others. Most of them have been in Playboy and other men´s magazines.

Back to Erika Eleniak, she appeared in a few movies like BEVERLY HILL BILLIES, CHASERS and BORDELLO OF BLOOD ( which got censored beyond recognition in Germany ) but she never achieved the level of success Pamela Anderson did. Not even Traci Bingham achieved it and she´s build like a porn star - in fact none of the other cast members of Baywatch did.

Carmen Electra is the only one who was anywhere near the success level of Pam and she also was in Playboy numerous times. A coincidence ? 

Erika Eleniak had some pretty hot scenes in CHASERS but my favorite movie with her is UNDER SIEGE. Which by the way is called ALARMSTUFE ROT ( Condition Red ) in Germany. That´s what you get when you use german words that make no sense in german - they have to come up with a different name. And that was one of the reasons why it was so difficult for me to find stuff about her until I figured out the original title.

Under Siege is one of the better Steven Seagal movies which means that his acting is not as bad as in other movies and it also has big stars like Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Busey and Nick Mancuso. The plot is simple but even though he only beats up smaller guys ( Did you notice that in most movies Steven Seagal only fights people who are smaller than him ? It makes it hard to take him serious. ) it´s a pretty decent action movie.

But the reason why I really like the film is of course Erika Eleniak and her sexy striptease after she comes out of a cake. She really shows some talent there which makes the fact that she never continued in that direction just more tragic. Ahh, the career she could have had stripping.

You can say what you want about Steven Seagal but he sure does have an eye for talent because it has been said that he included Erika Eleniak.

And if that rumor is true he has earned my eternal gratitude for giving the entire world one of the best striptease ever. And her manager who persuaded to take this part and use her stripper skills to the benefit of mankind. I bet he got something out of the deal as well. I know that if it had been me there would have been a few private sessions of rehearsing.

Of course the fabulous strptease is not the only scene where Erika struts her stuff because not only does she have wonderful breasts - she also has a tight derriere. There is also the scene in which she arrives on the ship where she steps out of the helicopter and has something on her shoe.

Erika leans forward to get it off,showing some good cleavage while all the horny sailors stand around drooling, hoping to get an eyeful. I guess they didn´t have to give the male actors much directions on this one.

She than walks past the viewer and the camera zooms in on her incredibly sculpted round and firm butt checks moving and shaking. Holy makarel !!!

Wow ! That has got to be one of the best butts in movies of all times together with sexbomb Kelly Overton working her butt crack in TEKKEN

and - of course - the spectacular Halle Berry in THE LAST BOY SCOUT .

And here´s Erika with her sexy striptease thanks to Steven Seagal who had the balls to include her in the script. I hope he at least got some.

Even if not I bet the strip was one of the scenes they had to do the most takes of. Steven probably had to relieve himself afterwards - if he didn´t get honey Erika to join him. In any case, it is Steven Seagal´s best movie and the one most liked by movie goers so in the end it was for the best.

So many happy returns Erika and thanks for the mammaries !

Today´s post has been all about a tv cult siren and playmate that I wanted to do a post about for a very long time so I thought it´s only fair that the first video is also about a telenovela icon and playmate : Aylin Mujica.

I don´t have time to go into all the details here but the 40 year old starred in MARINA ( a telenovela that helped me a great deal ) and another with possibly the best title ever SIN TETAS NO HAY PARADISO ( without tits there is no paradise ). Now you may think that I´m crazy writing about 40 year old tv stars but 40 is the new 24 and Aylin just did a photoshoot for the mexican Playboy where she showed : she still got it.

But since I know there are a lot of non believers out there here is a video.

Since this post was about stripteases our second clip is from BAILANDO PARA UN SUENO ( Dancing for a Dream ) which is the version of Dancing with the Stars from Argentina. Only the female contestants have bigger breasts, wear less clothing and instead of dancing they are stripping.

Last year I posted a striptease by übersexbomb Virginia Gallardo so this year it´s Belen Francese´s turn. The quality of the video is not as good but once again it goes to the limit of what you can show on television. 

A totally different show is TU CARA ME SUENA from spanish television which could be roughly translated as YOUR FACE LOOKS FAMILIAR although the spanish term " me suena " means something like making sounds or music if you take it literally. So it has kind of a double meaning since people - mostly celebrities - dress up and perform as famous singers.

Because it´s a spanish tv program and not a german one it´s an original idea and most of the performances are quite good. There is one who does an Adele performance almost better than the real thing but Today´s clip is Anna Simon with Kylie Minogue´s I CAN`T GET YOU OUT OF MY HEAD.

Anna Simon is another tv cult icon I wanted to do a post about for a long time but as always I haven´t gotten around to - not yet. As with Aylin Mujica I can´t explain everything about her but she´s a tv institution in Spain. I tried to find a particular clip on YouTube but since I could not find it here´s an animated GIF from one of her best shows. Ay oma, que rico !

But don´t fear here is a clip from the cult show TONTERIAS LAS JUSTAS where Anna appeared in a tight pink top to celebrate the 100th episode.

A stereotype many latin women have to deal with is that most foreigners think all latinas have black hair. Just ask Sofia Vergara. Anna is a natural blonde but in one episode of OTRA MOVIDA - another comedy / news / gossip show - she wore a black wig and she looked so stunning that her male co hosts kept hitting on her for the length of the entire episode.

At the moment Anna is one of the hosts of ZAPEANDO together with Cristina Pedroche and Ana Morgade which is the trifecta of hot tv babes.

Or at least one of the trifectas since there are so many hot sexbombs on spanish tv. I really have to do a post about this one day. Anyway, I only find short clips on the internet but this one is almost 15 minutes long.

If you ask me how best to describe Ana Morgade then I would say she´s like the spanish version of Tina Fey only with a DD breast size - at least.

She has a rapier wit, a great sense of humor and a body like a centerfold which is the reason why I included this last video. The cleavage on the shirt is not very deep but hold out till the end of the video where she moves a lot and you can see that there´s a lot jumping under her shirt .

Last year I put a whole bunch of Ana Morgade videos here so there´s no need for me to add more. Instead I´m posting three videos with massita Ximena Cordoba who´s possibly the hottest weather girl on the planet. In the first video Ana Morgade does the flamenco version of the weather forecast and in the final one she plays water war with Frank Blanco.

New to the blog ? Everything you need to know about TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN : top ten posts / more posts of interest / best of the best

Como a cualquier mujer latina, por alguna razon, a algun lugar se nos tiene que ir la grasa que comemos, Yo soy una mujer muy comelona, a mi me encantan los tacos, y mi cuerpo naturalmente, accumula toda la grasita que me como en mi trasero, asi que es normal que tengo un culo espectacular.

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