As I have announced a lot of birthday posts will be done after the actual birthday this year since there is no way that I can catch up. So here´s me hollering at one of the biggest massitas on the planet, the devine Thalia.
I am doing this post because right now I am in - between posts and after all the things I had to do this and last week and the consecutive sleep deprivation I´m not in the mood for a FLASH FRIDAY WITH PAUL RYAN post.
The good thing is that I already know what my next posts are going to be but I still have to prepare some stuff before I can get to it. I wanted to write a bit more about that but as always it got a bit too long and if you are interested you can read all about it in this post . So back to Thalia.
Thalia is the total package because she is one of the nicest people on the planet, she has the soul of a saint, the voice of an angel and a relentless body made for sin. Her moves on stage drive men crazy and although she does not fall into the usual blonde archetype with big breasts she could easily multiply the circulation of any gentlemen magazine with her curves. She oozes sex appeal from every pore without coming off cheap or dirty.
If scientists one day start cloning the perfect woman they need look no further for a living genetic blueprint that Thalia who has the best stage outfits in the universe which would make other singers like Beyonce or Rihanna blush and her sultry fertility dance makes sex icon Janet Jackson´s patented erection inducing striptease moves look tame.
On top of that Thalia is also one of the biggest recording artist in spanish speaking countries ( to list all her accolades would bust the length of this post but if you have some extra time you can read her wikipedia entry ).
Ariadna Thalia Sodi Miranda ( born August 26, 1971 ), known simply as Thalia, is a mexican - american singer and actress. Her name is linked to soap operas which made her famous worldwide. Thalia began her music career at the age of 9. Her soap operas have been watched by over 2 billion people in 180 countries. She is known globally as " the queen of soap operas " for being the biggest tv phenomenon in the decade of the 90s. Thalia has the keys of more than 50 cities in the world, and has toured in five continents, making her one of the most internationally famous Latin singers ever. Thalia has received more than 2,000 awards throughout her career for both singing and acting and has sold over 25 million albums worldwide. Her best selling album is Amor A La Mexicana, while her first to be released globally is En Extasis. She is also known among english speakers in the United States for her song I Want You from her english album in 2003 which went to #22 on the Billboard Hot 100.
But let´s start at the beginning of my love for Thalia. Which takes me back to my teen years - not exactly my earliest childhood but when I was a much younger lad - when I would spend all my summer holidays in Spain.
Readers abroad might not know it but here in Germany one reason why people still work as teachers despite the lack of respect and anything even vaguely resembling an adequate monetary compensation for all their grief are the long vacations which were around six week in the summer when I was young. I don´t know how long they are now but back then they seemed endless and every year we came home where everything just seemed better. The food, the people, the beach, the girls, movies, the tv but especially the comics. There was what seemed like an abundance of cool comic books. Of course some of the series were available in Germany but the german issues were waaay behind - sometimes even years - of what came out in Spain at the time and most of the cool series weren´t even published. So every year I couldn´t wait to get to Spain for a few weeks of good food, uncut movies, good tv shows and the best of comics.
Now longtime readers may remember that I mentioned that when I was in Spain the last times I was not exactly in a very highly populated area. So let me illustrate that further : maybe you know or you have heard about the city called Barcelona. It is one of the big Metropolises of the world.
Looks nice, doesn't it ? But that´s not where I was. Well, a little more to the Costa Dorada lies Torredembarra, a town that's your basic tourist trap but that still has a lot of places to go and shops and all kind of stuff. We used to have a small apartment there but that's another story.
Not as good as being in Barcelona but not bad either. But that's also not where I was. That was a totally remote area called La Pobla de Montornes which is an even smaller ..... just think Smallville but not as technological advanced. The streets of La Pobla look something like this .....
Now you might say : okay, that's not so bad. I haven't finished. This is La Pobla but ..... I was not actually IN La Pobla I was in an even more remote area that's outside the town. In fact you have to take the car and drive ten minutes to get to the town ( and I´m using that term very loosely here ) or walk for half an hour. And the streets look something like this :
So when I went home it became a habit to stock up on comic books, books, music and movies along the way as long as I had access to modern civilization because once I was there buying anything became a Herculean effort. I also had video mix cassettes for relaxation purposes only of the best scenes with hot sexbombs from movies or tv shows at my crib and I took a lot of them to Germany which had to last for the rest of the year.
I also made lots of tapes from spanish tv shows that had hot singers like Sabrina Salerno, Monica Naranjo, Marlene Mourreau, Carmen Russo or Mar Saura´s unforgettably sexy live wardrobe malfunction on VERANO NOCHE.
In fact there were a few of those on spanish tv like the one that shot Sabrina Salerno into superstardom all over Europe except Germany. It was on New Year´s of 1988 where she performed " Hot Girl " and couldn´t control her boobs - they popped out of her top showing a lot of nipplage.
Speaking about megahot live performances, while french blow up sex doll Marlene Mourreau never had any wardrobe malfunctions ( mainly because she either didn´t wear much clothes to begin with and got rid of the little she did wear very quickly ) her pornographic appearances were always so sexually charged and her stage outfits so skimpy that she almost got banned from spanish tv. And everyone who has seen the heavily sexual content they show on spanish tv knows that it takes a lot to get banned.
So one year I was very tired when I finally arrived home and decided to leave setting up the vcr for the next day and the first thing I saw on spanish tv was Sonia Monroy´s most oversexed tv porn appearance.
She became famous as a member of the aptly named all busty pop group Las Sex Bombs whose debut album sold 50,000 copies in Spain and went gold. She also was on Supervivientes which is the spanish version of Survivor and in the tv appearance that I managed to see but could not tape with the vcr she wore a dress with the mother of all cleavages even rivaling Kylie Minogue´s plunging mega cleavage in I Just Can´t Get You Out Of My Head. It´s a miracle she didn´t have a wardrobe malfunction on the set ( she had to straighten out her cleavage constantly during her appearance ) although the dress didn´t leave anything to the imagination where her gigantic 38D deluxe XXL double airbags are concerned either.
I set up the vcr the next day but of course the show was not repeated and it took me a few years to find even some small clip on the internet. From then on setting up the vcr was always one of the first things I did.
In any case, I always tried to get as much loot as I could - so to speak - and the rest of the year I lived of everything I brought over from Spain. Which really hasn´t changed that much in the years that have passed since.
I mean the number of good comics that are published in Germany have increased drastically and thanks to comic conventions and the availability of reasonably priced hardcovers via amazon or other internet outlets my comic library of non - spanish comics has grown quite a bit over the years.
But comparing the range of different genres, the variety of titles, the quality of national comics and the value for money ratio Spain clearly wins. In Germany comic prices are just way too high and also the market caters almost exclusively to collectors with an absolute lack of cheap, affordable good comics for the average reader like the DC SHOWCASE, MARVEL ESSENTIALS, BIBLIOTECA MARVEL or CLASSICOS DC lines. I mean, every time I´m on vacation you can read all about the superior spanish editions on this very blog and apart from that Spain is also at least 10 years ahead.
We had DRAGON BALL 20 years before the first comic or tv episode even made it´s way to Germany. And even then they had to censor certain scenes from the tv series to make it adequate for german tv audiences.
One of the censored scenes of the german version, which plays a big part in the following relationship between Yamcha and Bulma. As it could not be any other way the whole episode doesn´t make any sense without it.
And here we finally get back to Thalia. The bulk of the animated GIFs in this post are from Thalia´s performance of her hit MUJER LATINA at a gala at the end of the year 1998. Normally I was only in Spain during summer, but for some strange reason that year I had the luck to be there for Christmas and the end of the year so I could see all the big gala shows like this one where Thalia shows some awesome moves. Maybe it was fate.
I first saw Thalia on the show SORPRESA SORPRESA - where celebrities surprise their fans - and I really had no idea who she was or that she´s bigger than Madonna in the latin world. But I was immediately impressed by her dance moves, her looks, her erotic singing voice ( I dare any man to not get a boner when she screams out Ay ay ay during her performances as she sounds like she was just impaled ) and her overwhelming stage presence. I am usually a boobs man so I generally go with big breasted women - especially big breasted asian women. Especially big breasted asian cosplayers. And in particular asian cosplayers with huge 40D oppai !
Anyway, Thalia convinced me that you don´t always need big breast to be sexy. Thalia does not have huge breasts yet she just oozes sex appeal !
Like I said in the beginning of the post I had to cut part of this post because it was getting too long so I used the opportunity to split the birthday between this post and the next one. There are no links for this post so let´s get right to the birthdays which start with two celebrity birthdays that I missed this year but already covered in earlier years.
Our first one is Richard Corben who celebrates his 77th birthday and about whom I have written in various posts over the years, starting in March of 2009 when I pimped the Haunt of Horror hardcover that was at a bargain price at amazon. I also did a special post about Hellboy in Mexico with a lot of stuff about lucha libre - the mexican version of wrestling - and another Hellboy comic by Richard Corben, The Crooked Man was part of a post with some reading tips for Halloween . His version of The Raven was part of a double feature on Edgar Allen Poe´s anniversary together with The Black Cat by the great late Bernie Wrightson and last year I did one of my usual posts with lots of original art from series like Cage to Hellblazer.
Busty Baywatch beach body par excellence Erika Eleniak turned 48 who appeared in the pages of PLAYBOY and was the Playmate of the Month in July 1989. Despite being a total knockout she she never achieved the level of success Pamela Anderson did. Not even Traci Bingham achieved it and she´s build like a porn star - in fact none of the other cast members of Baywatch did. Erika appeared in a few movies like Beverly Hillbillies, Bordello of Blood ( which got censored beyond recognition in Germany ) and she had some very hot scenes in Chasers but it was her striptease from Under Siege that earned her an entry in the top part of my Top Ten Movie Striptease List and since there is nothing I could add at this point just check out the re - post I did last year with more and better GIFs.
In the post I had to cut from this one we have literal cult siren Christina Milian who makes other celebrities look bad whenever the paparazzi take pictures of her bikini hardbody. She celebrated her 36th birthday on the 26th of September and she played Kali in Ghosts Of Girlfriends Past although it was uncredited which is a shame because she´s phenomenal.
The reason why I´m bringing this up is that in this post we have Lacey Chabert who turned 35 on the 30th of September who played Sandra in that movie. Damn, I know it´s a chick flick but with so many hot sexbombs in the cast I should still get it if only for Christina. Lacey Chabert is best known for Party Of Five where her chest already started to develop and since I never watched the show I missed out on all that teen boobage.
Another big hit Lacey Chabert is associated with is Mean Girls with then teenage Busenwunder Lindsay Lohan ( who got her own entry as Supergirl in my Hollywood Edition of Casting The Justice League Of America Movie ) which I still haven´t seen. Probably because I am not sure if I already bought the movie on DVD or not. Man, I´ll have to go through my files. It is weird that I haven´t seen that movie because a. ) from what I hear it´s pretty funny, b.) there are some important messages in that movie which is one of the reasons why it has become a cult movie, another being that c.) Lindsay still had her real breasts back then. I mean, her big breasts.
She still has breasts and they are still real but it´s never going to be like in those early days when every horny shutin wanted to put her body to the test and there was even a countdown on the internet for when it was legal to have sex with Lindsay Lohan. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Speaking on mighty things and big racks, Lacey Chabert also played Penny Robinson in the otherwise forgettable Lost In Space movie from 1998.
In the movie her character has a huge crush on the ship´s pilot played by Matt LeBlanc who´s only interested in her bigger sister played by Heather Graham - who naturally doesn´t give him the time of day and is very abusive towards him without any reason. I recently re - watched that movie and when I saw the poor guy being put down by Heather Graham I wanted to scream : " Forget that snobby woman. Stick to her little sister. She´s utterly fallen heads over heels for your so just stay on her good side and wait a few years. You´re stuck here for a long time anyway and believe me SHE will turn out so much hotter than her uptight sister. "
I can´t say that I´ve seen a lot of Chasey´s movies, I only know that she is in a lot of Hallmark Christmas movies, like A Royal Christmas where she co stars with Dr. Quinn, Jane Seymour or A Christmas Melody which was even directed by Mariah Carey, her co star in that movie who naturally also sings. Talk about your hot sexbomb / mega MILF sandwich. Oh, Mama !
Mariah Carey also is in my JLA movie casting although in the alternates since I would basically give her any role just to have her take her clothes off in the movie. On the other hand I definitely would put her in the cast of a movie adaption of Kevin J. Taylor´s adult comic series The Girl since she has such superior stripper skills and she would naturally play orally fixated deepthroat specialist Jill since Kevin Taylor himself has cast her in that role and who am I to argue with such a master of erotic comic books ?
Besides movies Lacey does a lot of voice acting and she´s probably best known as the voice of Meg Griffin on the first season of Family Guy ( due to her workload at school and on Party Of Five she left to be replaced by Mila Kunis ), a show my brother doesn´t tire to tell me how funny it is. I always wondered who comes up with the kind of sick stuff that happens on the show but recently I saw an episode of The Graham Norton Show with Seth MacFarlane as a guest where he said that he never runs out of story ideas because he went to high school with many Peter Griffins.
Lacey Chabert also was the singing voice of the young Anastacia in my favorite Don Bluth movie ( Thalia did the part for the spanish speaking audience ), Tanya Mousekewitz in the An American Tail movies, Calista in Disney´s Hercules cartoon, two different characters on Gargoyles : The Goliath Chronicles, Gwen Stacy on The Spectacular Spider - Man, Daisy Johnson a.k.a. Quake on Avengers : Earth´s Mightiest Avengers - I am not sure if that is the same character that Chloe Bennet plays on Marvel´s Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. - and Zatanna Zatarra and Isis on Young Justice.
We have another celebrity birthday from September the 30th with french Power Girl Monica Bellucci who turned 53. She is also in my JLA casting.
I put her in the finale of the Hollywood Edition of Casting The JLA Movie series as Wonder Woman but now I´m tending more towards Big Barda.
In the original FOURTH WORLD comics by Jack Kirby - and this definitely changed in the NEW 52 - Big Barda was built like a brick shithouse with the personality of a lady trucker, the muscles of a female bodybuilder, the hot measurements of a playmate of the year and the cupsize of a porn star.
She got that from her mother Big Breeda, the fiercest female warrior on Apokolips who - nomen est omen - was therefore selected by Darkseid himself to breed the next race of warriors. I don´t know if it was because she spurned his advances or if he just thought she would produce the best offspring but it is implied that they used her like a blow up sex doll !
All for the next generation of Akopolips´ finest of course. Now with Big Barda the melons didn´t fall far from the tree and when she began to develop, especially in certain parts of her anatomy that had to do with procreation Darkseid decided to let her follow in her mother´s footsteps and - like mother like daughter - personally introduce Big Barda to the breeding pens to continue the family tradition. So as soon as she got wind of Darkseid´s perverted plans for her Big Barda decided to ditch Apokolips and hitched the next ride to Earth. According to Big Barda she managed to do that before Darkseid had a chance to break her in but maybe she was so eager to join Mister Miracle because she had tasted the Darkseed.
For more on DC´s creepy sex stories with Big Barda - like the time when Superman starred in a porn mocvie with her and then claimed he could not remember a thing - check out BIG BARDA : DEATH, LIES AND VIDEOTAPES .
( and click here for more great art by Steve Rude " The Dude " )
Like I said, originally I casted Maria Grazia Cucinotta as Big Barda but keeping in mind her history I may cast her as Big Breeda. Not only to get Maria to do nude scenes that way but also because then I could cast italian 37C sexbomb Monica Bellucci as Big Barda and give the role of Wonder Woman to european 90s porn superstar Sarah Loiuse Young .
Speaking about Jack Kirby´s Fourth World I might have posted some of these links before but for some old school Jack Kirby art from the original Mister Miracle series the PENCIL INK blog has the cover and one page each for issues 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 7 , 10 , 11 , 12 , 13 , 15 and 17 . There might be posts on other issues but these are the ones I found while looking for a good picture of Big Barda by Jack Kirby and I don´t have the time to go through the entire blog. Right now there are a lot of specials and new series released by DC in lieu of the 100th anniversary of Jack Kirby´s birth but while some things like The Kamandi Challenge or the Bug series look interesting I haven´t yet had the time - or money - to check them out.
Also I will probably wait until I can buy them in collected from. Which is something you should not do with the new Mister Miracle series according to the guy who made the video below because it´s an instant classic. My brother pointed me towards his channel - as unbelievable as it may sound - because he always roasts bad SJW Disney comics and then rips them in half but in most of the videos I have seen so far he gives good reviews.
And we are staying with cult comics as with our last celebrity birthday as Olivia Thirlby turns 31 Today. I have only seen her in Dredd where she did a terrific job portraying everybody´s favorite leather clad judge, the blonde bombshell with legs up to her chin, the seductive Psi Judge Anderson.
The only negative thing I can say about the movie is that Olivia´s nude sex scene was way too short and filmed too much out of focus. What good are all the high definition cameras, blue rays and giant plasma screens with perfect picture resolution if the picture is all blurry ? This is the worst misuse of digital technology since Disney shrank Lindsay Lohan´s booming teenage boobs in Herbie Fully Loaded. What a waste of time, money and resources not to mention an incredibly horny sexbomb like Olivia Thirlby.
I don´t understand why they didn´t show the scene right and why it was not longer because in my opinion the movie could have only benefit from it. I mean we already got the adult rating and it´s not like we would have done anything different with blow up sex doll Judge Anderson in that situation than what the perverted perp really wanted to do
Of course Psi Judge Anderson and Judge Dredd first appeared in the legendary british comic series 2000 AD and that´s a gap in my comic collection I still have to close. So far I have only read the Judge Dredd comic that DC put out and what was in the Free Comic Book Day issues.
Since I have written a lot about how I spent my teenage years I think it´s only appropriate to include a cartoon I would also watch around that time.
Like japanese anime shows the hentai movies also were heavily censored in Germany which was one of the reasons why I got all the good stuff like Cool Devices, Rei Rei, Urotsukidoji or La Blue Girl in the spanish version.
Of course not only the sexual content was a problem with german censors and so you could not watch the animes that were very violent like Fist of the Northstar where heads explode every 5 minutes or anything with ninjas or samurais. Which is only about 50 percent of all anime produced.
My next clip has nothing to do with the topic of this post but since I have been looking for clips of this woman for years I wanted to pu it on the blog as soon as possible. Since you are probably exhausted by this point I will only add that this woman with the Power Girl cup size is newscaster Oana Andoni from the romanian tv station Pro Tv. Everything else, like an explanation of how I came across her as well as her best clips from YouTube is in my next post. Expect to see more of this bra - buster in the future.
Since most of the post was a nostalgic look back at Thalia´s career you could expect that I would end the post with a classic Thalia video which would be no problem since I have probably bookmarked a dozen. But I´m selfish and instead of an old favorite with bad resolution I´m posting two relatively new live performances by Thalia which I haven´t seen myself.
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Sometimes there´s only one way to escape the pain in your brain - pass it on to some other creep !