Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Happy re - posted birthday to Janet Jones !

Today swimsuit siren Janet Jones Gretzky celebrates her 56th birthday so it´s time to re - post her entry like I did last year. The initial plan was to re - post the entire post and pimp it to the nines with some animated GIFs.

But I guess that it´s true what they say about the best laid plans of men and mice because after adding all the GIFs the strain was too big and the page did not load completely anymore. So I had to cut a lot of stuff and pictures. Thankfully I had saved the original post which I restored and as there was too much I had to cut for this version this has turned into the re - posted version which is mainly about Janet Jones. In the end I had to make three new posts : one for Janet Jones, one for Leslie Easterbrook and one for Becky Mullen which concentrates on the part about them although it incorporates stuff about the others. I´m not sure to which extent until I have finished them but you can find the original post here .

The post about Janet Jones started as a way to give props to one of the unsung heroines that transform otherwise unwatchable b - movies into bearable entertainment. It was also a possibility for me to talk about the POLICE ACADEMY movie franchise and a whole lot of other stuff. Janet is of course best known for appearing in POLICE ACADEMY 5 - ASSIGNMENT MIAMI BEACH in a stunning white swimsuit presenting her best assets and she´s one of the reasons people still watch the movie. Or at least wait for the parts with her in them to be over before zapping to something else.

Nowadays nobody really watches the complete movies anymore because thanks to a seemingly neverending number of sequels Hollywood has managed to completely ruin the franchise. I remember seeing the first one in the theater and coming out pretty overwhelmed because at that time it was really a novel concept. And I still think the first part holds up pretty well. Not that it is the big cinematographic gem but it is funny and entertaining if you haven´t seen the gags repeated in the other sequels. It sure launched a few careers since it brought Steve Guttenberg a big career boost and gave Bubba Smith and Michael Winslow their big break.

Although I have to confess I´m not sure what Michael Winslow is doing right now. I know he did some really bad german movies starring Thomas Gottschalk and written by Thomas Gottschalk ( who else would cast Thomas Gottschalk in a movie who didn´t owe him a favor ? ) but also better stuff like SPACEBALLS and ROBOT CHICKEN. Steve Guttenberg was pretty big in the 80s and 90s but to the current generation he´s probably best known for playing corrupt town mayor Woody Goodman on VERONICA MARS with the lovely Kristen Bell in the lead role of plucky successor to Nancy Drew, Veronica Mars. I guess I just appeared on all search engines because I mentioned Kristen Bell. Speaking about VERONICA MARS, Charisma Carpenter also has a part on the show who is of course best known for playing Cordelia on BUFFY and later on the spin off ANGEL.

Besides VERONICA MARS Charisma Carpenter was also in episode 11 of season 5 of BURN NOTICE where she showed that she still has it.

Which brings us to Enrico Colantoni, who plays ex - sheriff / ex - private eye / new sheriff Keith Mars and he also was on an episode of BONES which is the new series of David Boreananz who plays FBI agent Seely Booth and who also played Angel first on BUFFY and then on ANGEL. And Kim Catrall - who later on had more SEX AND THE CITY - also appeared in the first POLICE ACADEMY movie. Like I said, it was pretty good but with each sequel the quality has gotten worse and worse and the only good parts were the ones with hot babes like Janet Jones who is the only reason anybody can suffer through these pieces.

The other reason is Sexbombe Leslie Easterbrook who plays megabusty police officer Debbi Callahan and had her best scene in POLICE ACADEMY 4 - CITIZENS ON PATROL where she was in a pool with a wet t - shirt .

There have been some requests for HQ GIFs of the scene but these are the best I could find. If you find any in better quality please let me know.

Leslie Easterbrook´s secondbest clip is in POLICE ACADEMY 5 when she´s on the plane and two boys stare at her cleavage thinking her fast asleep. If you pay attention you see how she first yells at them. But then when they try to check her out again you can see her flashing a proud grin and pushing her boobs up a bit so they can get a good eyeful of her melons.

Which shows what a sense of humor Callahan has and that despite everything she´s still proud of her quite distracting breasts .

She probably got that from Leslie Easterbrook, the voluptuous actress who portrays Callahan and appears in most of the POLICE ACADEMY movies, who seems like the kind of actress I’d love to have lunch with. She knows exactly what kind of movies she’s in, and plays the part with a vicious commitment unseen in most comedies of this ilk. She’s perfectly O.K. with being objectified and in interviews seems amused and tickled at some of the things she’s had to do. Pragmatic, flirty, professional and practical, Easterbrook is one of the stars of the POLICE ACADEMY series and may well be one of the women who influenced my fixation on confident blondes with big breasts that kick ass like Power Girl.

Leslie´s Callahan was kind of empowering for women, she was strong, intelligent, kick - ass tough as nails, independent and secure in her sexuality. Physically she was superior to most men who came across as rather stupid and one - minded most often suffering - or inflicting upon others - heavy injury while being distracted by her centerfold curves.

Now back to Janet Jones Gretzky who was a few times on the cover

and inside of PLAYBOY magazine and yes, she is that famous ice hockey player´s wife. Man, that guy had really excellent taste in women.

As her appearances in the pages of PLAYBOY have proven she´s one hot masssita and since she looks absolutely boobielicious in a swimsuit she takes over Leslie Easterbrook´s part as eye candy - at least partially. In an X - Men movie I would cast Janet as Dazzler.

Or she could play my favorite X - Girl Tabitha Smith a.k.a. Boom Boom ( because of her big boom booms ) since they could be twin sisters.

And so you can get idea what that would look like here are some scenes from POLICE ACADEMY 5 - ASSIGNMENT MIAMI BEACH with Janet Jones in a white swimsuit or just watch the movie. If you do don´t be surprised to see Rene Auberjonois who played Odo on STAR TREK - DEEP SPACE 9.

Janet Jones, whose film credits include BEASTMASTER, STAYING ALIVE, THE FLAMINGO KID, A CHORUS LINE, AMERICAN ANTHEM and A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN also did a workout video where she wears a white suit. 

White really is her colour. I guess I would have bought her workout tape and I wouldn´t have regretted it from the short clips I was able to watch.

Janet really shows her best parts ( like her perfectly sculpted ass !!! ) and in some instances there is some nipplage visible through the thin fabric.

The tape is available through amazon so there still must be some demand for it. I´m not sure who can play it since the only way to get something equipped with a VCR is one of these combo machines that have a DVD player and those are going out of style as everything is Blue Ray now.

Speaking about hot PLAYBOY covergirls / centerfolds : Pamela Anderson hasn´t made a workout tape ( her most famous tape is more kind of a home video ) but she was on an episode of MARRIED WITH CHILDREN with Becky Mullen of which I found some GIFs while doing the research.

It´s the episode where Al is having these dream sequences with first Becky, then with Pamela and then with both fighting over him but each time it´s about to get interesting Kelly - of course - wakes him up.

I really can´t decide who´s hotter in the episode, Pamela or Becky. I mean Pamela is Pamela, my very first candidate for the SEARCH FOR POWER GIRL series but Becky is nobody you would throw out of bed either. The scene when she takes off the business suit is just extremely sexy. WOW !

Becky appeared in a few erotic movies like SINFUL INTRIGUE, which is extremely difficult to find because there seem to be at least ten movies with this name and you want to get the right one. In the movie she´s a hot babe who gets taken advantage of by her pervy husband who makes her do some slutty hardcore stuff with which she is not comfortable.

Basically he treats her like a prostitute which is not okay. Even if she has the measurements to be the centerfold of a certain publication for men I already mentioned twice in this post you should treat her with respect. But her husband is not even trying, I mean no flowers, no presents, no nice dinner, just " Slut up, wife ! " and then it´s " Wham, bang, not even Thank you, Ma´am ! " What a dork. On top of that he cheats on her with every other woman he comes across like his nymphomanic hasian porn masseuse Mai - Ling ( really, like there are no other names for asian women, but that´s Hollywood for you ) played by ultrahot Chona Jason, who gives his schlong a massage - one of the best scenes of the movie.

Oh, there is one decent guy in the movie who has the hots for Becky Mullen - her neighbour - but of course she keeps him at a distance and only does it with him out of pity when he´s ill. Just like in real life.

The guy who treats her like a prostitute gets to do her every which way day in and day out the whole year while the nice guy finishes last.

There´s some kind of murder story involved but the important thing is that Becky Mullen gets to strut her stuff and wears some kinky outfits. If you have a chance you should watch the movie, it´s quite entertaining and the story doesn´t distract too much from the erotic parts of it. The movie also has an all star cast with a lot of hot babes like erotic movie veterans Lorissa McComas in a lesbian scene and Griffin Drew ( who joins Chona Jason turning her sex massage into a threeway endurance test ! )

Now, all of this might not be interesting but the reason why I´m even mentioning it at all is that besides having parts on almost every tv show from RENEGADE to CYBIL to MADtv to PACIFIC BLUE to HUDSON STREET to HIGH TIDE to BLACK SCORPION and appearing in Andy Sidaris´ HARD HUNTED movie she also played the part of Sally, the Farmer´s Daughter.

Not on Playboy Late Night or in an erotic movie but on the first season of GLOW, Gorgeous Ladies Of Wrestling one of the few shows with female wrestlers shown on german tv. At that time as a wrestling fan you took what you could get and I´m not sure if the show was really that serious.

 Although there was this one episode where one of the female wrestlers had an accident and sprained or dislocated her elbow and they kept repeating that footage over and over during the show. Which was really freaking me out. There were some weird characters on the show and I remember having a thing for Palestina who had quite a big rack.

This is the clip with the best quality I could find on YouTube where she goes up against Olympia. Man, I totally forgot that she never wore a bra.

I think GLOW aired around the time when the legendary CATCH UP show was on RTL presented by Joe Williams and Horst Brack der Bestrafer ( Horst Brack the Punisher, obviously named after the MARVEL character ).

While the wrestling matches ( NWA, CWA and WCW ) were interesting the best parts were the banter between straight man Joe Williams and heel Horst Brack. And of course the highlights of the shows was the interview section BRACK´s PRANGER ( Brack´s pillory ) where Horst Brack either buttered up his guests or trashed them depending on whether he liked them or not. But Horst Brack wasn´t just like most people all talk and even participated in a few wrestling matches. I tried to find the legendary fight against Rene Lassartesse but the only video I could find was this one : Horst Brack & Rolo Brazil versus Rene Lasartesse & Indio Guajaro.

Horst Brack a.k.a. Rochus Hahn a.k.a. Robi is also a prolific comic writer who wrote such german cult comics like MENSCHENBLUT, DR. DIPPERZ ( the german version of Dr. House only this one really IS insane ), HORST, LUNA, ARSINOE or ALRAUNE. One of THE coolest guys in german comics.

I remember that every time at the INTERNATIONALER COMIC SALON ERLANGEN he was nominated for best writer or best comic with his newest publication from SCHWARZER TURM and most of the times won.

Since I never got to do them in previous re - posts I want to include a few other celebrity birthdays and maybe I can cover a few more next year. In 2016 the whole celebrity birthday thing has gotten a bit out of hand and so this year I´m trying to include only those where I have bookmarked a video as with the stunning Sarah Shahi who turns 37 and whom you might know from Life or Person of Interest which I think is currently on hiatus.

Next we have singing siren Sabrina Setlur who celebrates her 43rd birthday which takes me back to the days when there were 2 music video channels I watched and german rap bands. To american readers this is maybe news but there are also rappers here in Germany and Sabrina Setlur started as Schwester S with the Rödelheim Hartreim Projekt and I remember staying up late at night so I could tape the remix of Folge Dem Stern - because there was more Sabrina Setlur in that one. One scene in particular ended up as a loop on many of my music video / erotic movie clips mix tapes.

Ah, the mammaries .... I mean memories this brings back. Just the other day I was looking for some episodes of Samurai Jack because a reviewer on YouTube was talking about it without end like it was the be - all and end - all of animation when I came across Samurai Champloo. I had totally forgotten about it. Anyway, here is the full video of Folge dem Stern - the remix - and you can decide if you would have stayed up late for this one.

George Foreman turns 68 Today and oddly enough I DO have a video for the occasion although initially I was looking for videos with Muhammad Ali.

The next birthday takes me - once again - back to my younger days as Walter Hill celebrates his 75th anniversary. He is responsible for a lot of stuff I watched be it as the director of  movies like The Warriors, 48 Hours, Streets Of Fire, Red Heat or Tresspass or as a producer like with Aliens. I think he also had a soft spot for the classic EC horror comics since he produced not only the Tales From The Crypt tv series but various EC Comics adaptions : Two - Fisted Tales, Demon Knight and Ritual starring Jennifer Grey best known for her role in the cult movie Dirty Dancing.

From cult movies to cult tv shows, we close Today´s post with another episode of Catch Up featuring Joe Williams and Horst Brack, Der Bestrafer.

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