Thursday, June 08, 2017

Yaya Han : asian persuasion spin - off post

I just can´t seem to finish with the spin - off posts from Janet Jackson´s completely unscheduled birthday post : first I decide to write no Janet Jackson birthday post, then I had to make one, then I decide to split it into two posts because it got way too long and then the second post also gets longer and longer because once again I get totally carried away - as always where ultimate hasian cosplay sexbomb Yaya Han is concerned.

Man, every time I think I am ready to treat the subject of cosplaying professionally and objective Yaya goes and wears something like these outfits and turns me back into a drooling, uncontrollably horny idiot.

So this is the part with Yaya Han that started when I was thinking about some casting choices for Kevin J. Taylor´s adult comic The Girl. I already cast Janet Jackson in the title role, Halle Berry as oral deepthroat addict Marty and Mariah Carey as hooker Jill ( whom Kevin Taylor himself draws to look like Mariah ) with Beyonce playing another stripper in Girl´s club.

Naturally every strip club needs an asian sexbomb and I would cast cosplay queen Yaya Han whose spectacular body was made for these kind of roles.

Which is not some kind of racial stereotype about asian women being genetically engineered to be perfect blow up sex dolls for men through centuries of prostitution, just stating that she gave herself porn implants.

I don´t know how good her abilities as a stripper are but we all know that she has the necessary bust to fill out the role with her giant 40D oppai.

Speaking about filling out roles, there have been a few people who were not happy about Yaya Han´s recent cosplay as the Scarlet Witch and took opposition to her outrageously oversized orbs being displayed so openly.

Now as a full on pervert who is obsessed with anything relating to cosplay and asian sexbombs to boot I am down with anything that gets Yaya into a costume with a huge cleavage. But putting all of that aside for a moment, first off you have to acknowledge that her costume is flawless - as all her cosplays are. Otherwise Disney would have never asked her to do this and put her on a variant cover. Which is beyond cool and I can only imagine what that means for the cosplay community and especially for Yaya Han.

That must be the non plus ultra of validations and she´s doing this for the second time. Secondly this is not the first time that Yaya has cosplayed the Scarlet Witch and the previous times she did the original costume which is - let´s be fair here - basically just a Playboy bunny suit in red.

Yep, not too modest and Yaya is not exactly hiding her headlights under any bushels. So I´m not sure what the problem with the new costume is.

From a design point of view it is geared towards normal street clothes and not so much a traditional super hero dress which is an unfortunate trend plaguing comics now that movies have more importance than the comic books which is the material they are based on. Not that there have not been versions of the Scarlet Witch´s costume which incorporated more of that like when George Perez redesigned it. Which has a bustier and an exposed midriff section. So the new costume covers in fact more of her. 

There are of course people who claim that Yaya is doing a completely oversexed version of the Scarlet Witch which is way out of character.

And that is proof that those people have never read an AVENGERS comic in their life. Boy, if there is one character on that team´s roster that just oozes sex appeal than it´s Wanda Maximof. Don´t believe me ? Then let´s go through her history and take a look at her track record. Not only was she the überbabe all members of Magneto´s Brotherhood of Evil Mutants lusted after, when she became an Avenger she gave Hawkeye a boner and her body made even an android horny. As well as everybody else in the Marvel universe when the only women were her, the Wasp and Susan Storm. Looking back all her male teammates had the hots for Wanda.

Even her own brother it seems which is something they picked up again in ULTIMATES. Which was so oversexed and badly written that this really didn´t matter. But back in the day Wanda was the go - to damsel in distress and the top item for a villain´s bachelor base was probably to have her chained to a bed naked. I mean I get that all the villains like Arkon wanted to mate with her. Okay, in the comics they only kidnapped her but guess what they intended to do with her. Which wasn´t in the least bit awkward when it was revealed that Magneto was her father. Yes, that´s one way how writing as you make things up can bite you in the ass.

Now all those times Magneto had Wanda under his spell and tried to turn her into his lust slave look really weird. Of course he played the old amnesia card but the truth is he probably knew all along that old dog.

There is also the fact that Pietro admits that he only married Crystal because she reminded her so much of his sister Wanda. This happened in FANTASTIC FOUR 305 , the same issue in which Susan Richards proclaims that during her marriage with Reed she has never been with another man. So I guess Namor doesn´t count because he´s not a man but a mutant ? Female logic at it´s finest. Back to Wanda, Pietro´s confession gives credit to the theory that they were much more than just brother and sister.

The Scarlet Witch was also the Avengers chairwoman during Triathlon´s brief stint on the team and I bet that when she heard that a certain part of his body is three times as big, three times as long and gets three times as hard as your average black guy she had some special training sessions to find out to which extend it goes. If he also had three times the stamina, could make her climax three times as often squirting thrice the load.

For more on the Scarlet Witch the website SCARLET WITCHING has a post about The entire histoy of Wanda and Magneto´s relationship and THE PEERLESS POWER OF COMICS has an entry on her hex powers and her first glimpses as a villainess under John Byrne. So you see ? Long before Bendis made Wanda a reality altering super mutant it was established in the comics that everything was possible for her ( she even had twins with an android ) and that she´s so hot she made her own father and a machine horny. Heck, Simon Williams came back from the dead for her booty call.

So in reality Yaya is more truthful to the original character than people give her credit for but I guess it´s easy to be distracted by her double d decolletage. She can´t help it if her booming bosom is trying to burst free.

So far I have only made three solo posts on her although I keep mentioning her on various JLA casting posts and any other involving asian sexbombs like Ava Cadell, Kiana Tom, Akira Lane, Miko Lee, Gail Kim or Minka and I swear the completely SFW BIG YAYA HAN POST is still in the pipeline.

There´s also the matter of the covers of certain comic books or magazines I would love to see Yaya Han re - enact or at least see her wear the skimpy costumes on them in her next hot cosplay. About which I´m of two minds.

On one side it´s another of these things that I keep thinking about in the back of my head and which is driving me crazy. On the other I know that IF I really start this there will be no way to contain it to just one post so it´s likely to spin even more out of control than my Casting the Justice League of America movie series did. And it goes without saying this series would probably be even more NSFW which would be another reason not to do it.

Of course I´ve already thought about how to best group the covers I´ve selected so far and there is one all about Yaya doing male characters. Now I know that Yaya has said in some interviews that she doesn´t dress up as female versions of male characters but that is not completely true since I know that she DID dress up as the tenth Doctor. Anyway, while I know that it is probably for the best if I don´t do the cover posts there are some outfits I totally think Yaya should do. Well, I can still dream, can´t I ?

Being realistic here I want to say that it´s about time Yaya did something a bit more risky. And I´m not talking about my sexual fantasies here either.

The last time I wrote about her I mentioned her 35th birthday but I forgot to add that Yaya might want to reconsider doing a nude photoshoot. Too many celebrities never grab the chance to do nude pictures when they are in good condition and their banging bodies are in their prime. Then, twenty ( or thirty ) years later their biological clock starts ticking, they want to prove that they still look good and do some pictures. Well, how are we supposed to come to a qualified decision ? We don´t know how she looked in the buff when she was young and sexy. So please Yaya, do some nude shots while you still look good. Otherwise there is no proof.

Yaya Han has slowly but steadily made her way to the number two position on my favorite sexbomb list ( there are a few other much more explicit positions I would love to see Yaya Han assume and now that she has done an interview with PLAYBOY I hope we get to see her spreading her sexy legs in a nude pictorial ) not only based on the fact that my chances of bumping into her at a comic convention in Germany are higher than of actually meeting any of the other sexbombs on my dream date list but also because she combines four of my favorite things in her. Asian sexbombs, women with big boobs, video games and comics. How many chicks do you know who bring their own Power Girl, Chun Li or Jessica Rabbit outfit ?

Now don´t get me wrong. I´m not saying that Yaya is slipping here and only her fiancee can make a qualified statement if her wonder twins are starting to be affected by gravity. What I´m saying is that we make a lot of fuss about the physical shells we inhabit but in the end those are only disposable containers for us, our being, our soul if you will, and as such they have an expiration date. And as somebody whose body is rapidly deteriorating I can tell you that it doesn´t take much to be reminded of your own mortality. You slip in the bathtub and rip your shoulder tendon which in turn makes your body so weak that your knees start giving out so you have to get surgery and one day your don´t see so good and you need new glasses. It´s no fun when your body fails you and it can happen quick.

Speaking about bathtubs, I´m aware Yaya appeared naked in a fanfilm.

Naah, not really since she was pretty much covered with foam and we didn´t get to see anything. If you do another shower scene where your overdeveloped oppai are all soaped up do it right and give us full frontal.

Maybe I can still get my wish fulfilled and she does the bonerinducing shower scene with Chun Li from the animated Street Fighter movie.

Although to tell the truth, I would not mind if Yaya did my favorite scene from Rinkan Club instead. I would even volunteer as her on screen partner.

And there just has to be a way how we can get Yaya Han to wear the same outfit as Akira Lane below. Can you imagine Yaya Han´s king sized XXL breasts with the areolas of the nipples being totally visible in that mesh shirt and her naked butt only covered by a tiny string of dental floss ?

I bet sexbomb Yaya Han really knows how to work it - or twerk it !

Holy twin torpedoes, Yaya Han is one of the celebrities where looking for fake nude pictures on the internet is just an enormous waste of time since whatever you may find can never be as good as the real thing.

People always say I exaggerate with Yaya Han´s breastsize but according to internet sources she´s a 40D - which to tell the truth does not tell me that much. So she is a 40D but then her cupsize is 36D ? How does this work ? I know that women wear shoes two sizes too small but I would think with breast you would pick a bra that fits, right ? That´s confusing.

Anyway, the consensus seems to be 40D with Yaya Han on most internet pages. Now in centimeters that is 102 which means that keeping in mind she´s only 5 foot 1 ( 155 centimeters, about my height ) most porn stars don´t measure up. I remember there was a girl in PLAYBOY when I was in school who was the same height as Yaya Han and she only had a 95 centimeter bust but because of her height she looked like she could easily star in a Russ Meyer movie. And Yaya got 7 centimeters more of boobs !

Speaking about nude pictures of Yaya Han there are some pictures of banker / model Li Ling Ling from Singapore a.k.a. Busty Singaporean ( 38DD - 25 - 34 ) on the internet which were supposedly " leaked " by an IT person who was repairing her laptop. For some reason these pictures are on various adult websites under the title of " nude pictures of Yaya Han ".

Now as you can see above this woman has an impressive chest but it´s only 38DD. Yaya is two sizes bigger ! Which is the reason I had to give up on Miko Lee as her body double for the explicit sex scenes. While Miko is more than qualified she just can´t compete in the chest department.

Because of her superior oral skills she was a trainer for fluffers - women whose job it is to get male porn actors ready to perform when they can´t get it up anymore - and even handled a few emergency cases. There is no male who can resist Miko´s asian charms which has led to a few problems because most of her on screen partners can´t stop performing. And there have been many times where the frustrated director and crew have gone for a three hour lunch break while leaving the camera rolling so they could get everything on tape while Miko was engaged by up to four porn actors.

And while she is often booked with gay actors - porn productions often use them in regular movies because they can last longer as they normally don´t get aroused by sexual intercourse with women - there are a few who refuse to work with her after she turned a few gay actors straight.

Then I thought about asian porn star Hitomi Tanaka as Yaya´s boob double but I guess that´s taking it too far ( her whopping chest size is 32N !!! ).

Still I´m not giving up hope as there has to be someone out there who is in Yaya Han´s league and can double for her. I would really like to meet someone like that for a special weekend session on the casting couch.

And since I know some of my readers will go likely mad trying to find it here is the Ada Rising fanfilm with Yaya´s only shower scene - so far.

Speaking about asian sexbombs with mindblowing bodies and the right moves, you know the Yaya Han videos are a double feature with Hyuna as I have too many videos of them and not enough posts to put them in.

On top of that I usually don´t have the time to stay up to date so I didn´t know Hyuna already had a new hit. I don´t want to add to my list of Hyuna bookmarks so you will see a few other live performances in the next posts.

As I have already mentioned in an earlier post - although I don´t think it made much sense at that time -  there is a very hot dancer in this live performance who usually doesn´t get much screen time because she´s always on the far right side of the stage. She is wearing a yellow top and as you can see below here she is right next to Hyuna in the last bit.

Now I didn´t become aware of - let´s call her " Dancer X " for the moment in tribute of one of my favorite cartoon shows as a kid - in this video but another one where she is wearing a blue top and really shows that she has some moves. Anyway, I actually found two versions of the video where Dancer X is wearing the blue top, one with english subtitles of the lyrics that I have already posted . I am going to post the other version in one of the following post because I am not 100 percent sure it is the same.

As for the reason why I´m sticking with Dancer X for the moment : I - naturally - tried to find out more about her using google but all I came up with is that one of Hyuna´s dancers ( not Dancer X ) is getting a lot of attention who is from Greece. And also a lot of GIFs of the megabusty sexbomb below who seems to be in a completely different girl band. Not really helpful although I have to admit I would do it to her in a minute.

No, really, a whole minute is probably exactly how long I would last before climaxing with such a fit hardbody. I just hope she´s already of legal age or otherwise I could be in trouble. Okay, that´s enough preamble, I have to finish this post someday so here is the live performance of Hyuna´s How´s this ? and like I said, look out for the very hot dancer in the yellow shirt.

We are still kicking it hard like Bruce Lee - which means asian style - with another hot performer of whom I do not get to post videos often enough.

Although technically speaking Gail Kim is from Canada. Here she goes up against my other favorite knockout Velvet Sky who sadly wears one of her less becoming outfits. She is accompanied by Angelina Love who I still like to see because while she is a despicable person she plays a great heel and you can´t knock her mindblowing boobs. I´m serious here, I can´t knock her boobs because she would probably knock me out in one minute tops.

And not in the way the megabusty hasian above would. There was an " I quit " match where she went up against Velvet Sky in handcuffs ( don´t you love it how fast partners become mortal enemies and vice versa ? ) and Velvet started to strip Angelina´s clothes off to get her to give up and she continued in her bra. I still haven´t found that match on YouTube.

What I did find is one of the Roger Rabbit shorts with Jessica Rabbit - which I think are on the DVD as extra content - and since I mentioned her in the post I´m going to skip the usual episode of Samurai Champloo that is obligatory for an asian themed post in favor of Tummy Trouble.

Speaking of Jessica Rabbit, who would have no trouble to fill out that role is Alison Tyler with her whopping 36Fs who according to her imdb file was a tomboy at school and played volleyball plus rowed on the crew team.

Luckily Alison filled out in all the right places, lost her virginity at sixteen and started making adult movies at the age of nineteen. She has worked for every major x - rated movie company so I´m not going to list them all.

Besides her stunning physique and her long hair another argument for casting Alison Tyler as Jessica Rabbit is that she´s really tall with 6´.

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Wonder Twin powers activate !

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