Reposted birthday cult siren Jolene Blalock

Today one of tv´s hottest sci fi babes, Jolene Blalock celebrates her 42nd birthday. She is of course best known for playing T´Pol on ENTERPRISE.

From all the alien sexbombs on all the different Star Trek tv series T´Pol is on the top of my list. STAR TREK VOYAGER stuck Jeri Ryan and her big tits in a skin - tight suit in the show after Season 3 as 36DD drone of Borg Seven of Nine but ENTERPRISE just went and put the alien blow up sexdoll in the main cast of the show right from the pilot episode. Thanks, guys.

Sub - Commander / Commander T'Pol was the hottest vulcan sexbomb in the history of the universe and Enterprise's version of said Barbie of Borg ( read more about Jeri Ryan and the hot Star Trek women in her post ).

Under an agreement with the Vulcan High Command and Earths Starfleet T´Pol was placed aboard the NX - 01 Enterprise as Science and Executive Officer, serving under Captain Jonathan Archer. However she would eventually be brainwashed into " serving under " Commander Charles ' Dubya ' Tucker the Third, while under the effects of Trellium D.

I mean a Trellium - drugged out, semi emotional vulcan love slave with great curves and a killer rack - what's not to like about that ? Commander Fucker.....I mean Tucker had mul - t´pol orgasms thanks to the forbidden vulcan sexmassage....I mean T´Pol´s vulcan " body relaxation massage ".

Although I have to say T´Pol was also needy for Tucker´s earth meatpole because while Phlox gave her the idea to practice the vulcan massage it was T´Pol who went all " Kama Sutra on acid laced steroids " on Tucker.

She was so turned on by their midnight olympics that she had to use the old " it´s just for scientific reasons " schtick to bang him into submission.

Not that he put up much resistance to her since he´s been whacking off to her body since their first sessions in the decontamination chamber.

He even slipped Doctor Phlox a few bucks to get some quality time alone with T´Pol in decontamination like most of the horny males on board.

But he only managed to get her to strip and put the detox lotion all over his body with her boobs the first halfdozen times. It was totally worth it.

Okay, she didn´t repeat the sex experiment after finally banging Tucker silly ( which is the first rule of every scientific research - not having wild sex......but to repeat the experiment ) but it is not know if it was because of disappointment or because she was afraid she would like it too much. And in the mirror universe he even helped her out during Pon Farr.

There is this rumor that Pon Farr,the thing that turns all female vulcans into absolute nymphos worse than a cat in heat, was just a cheap attempt by the writers to get a bigger male audience. Well, I`m up for anything that lets T´Pol show her naked body. I bet the line to her bedroom goes through the whole ship during that period of the year and all the male " members " of the crew are taking turns at her as long as it lasts. Too bad the " Captain´s privilege " means he can cut line whenever he wants.

Now Pon Farr sounds hot and all, but I´m not sure I could wait another seven years before a lass like T'Pol wanted to explore her biological urges.

Although you would probably need seven years just to recover from getting your brains banged out by T´Pol every day during Pon Farr.

 
Jolene Blalock's Vulcan portrayal helped keep Star Trek : Enterprise in the limelight, but it was her time spent in decontamination and applying " neuropressure " to colleagues that re - ignited my warp engines.

Reading some online threats you could think Jolene Blalock was the first actress on Star Trek who was brought in to sex the show up. But as a matter of fact Marina Sirtis was on tv long before rocking the cleavage and the best parts of some episodes were Marina breathing heavily.

There are even some online rumors - but there´s probably no truth to it - that her role was supposed to be the ship´s telepathic sexdoll. In the first draft Deanna Troy wasn´t the ship´s counselor but rather the " ship´s consolation officer " a orgasmic priestess from the planet Betasex skilled in all known sex techniques to be used by the male crew for stress relief.

Because of their telepathic abilities the women from Betasex were ideal prostitutes and they also had a very high pain threshold and were very resilient so their clients could go for it. Which happened very often when they were working at some mining outpost frequented by sexstarved aliens with dozens of huge reproductive organs or big slimy tentacles.

Anyway, that´s just a silly rumor and there´s probably nothing to it. I mean the whole concept would never have passed american tv censors.

What is strange is the fact that for someone who is just supposed to give people advice she wore a pretty sexed up outfit that would totally defeat the purpose of counseling. All her male customers would be thinking about ripping her uniform off and banging her brains out and knowing it would be really uncomfortable. I guess the reason why they only made her kind of telephatic was that if she knew what the male crew members were thinking she couldn´t walk ten feet in the Enterprise and would never visit the bar. Speaking about the bar, if her role was to give people sage advice why did Guinan do basically the same ? So while still unverified the idea of Deanna Troi not only as the ship´s cleavage but also the ship´s adult entertainment system does have its merit. On the other side we know that the holo deck was used for the same thing. It´s so confusing.

What I could verify is that in the original draft Deanna Troy was supposed to have three breast, Tasha Yar had an unhealthy sexual crush on Wesley Crusher and Captain Picard couldn´t help but noticing  the ship´s Doctor Beverly Crusher´s natural walk resembles that of a striptease queen. Oy. Anyway, click here for more GIFs of Doctor Crusher´s and Deanna Troi´s space yoga and The 21 Times Dr. Beverly Crusher Was Your Fashion Idol .

That´s all for Today´s post, happy 42nd Jolene and many happy returns !

We continue with the celebrity birthdays in the video section and first up is german MILF Barbara Schöneberger a.k.a. Boobara Schöneberger or Barbara Schöne Berge depending on which Freudian Slip you tend to.

The talk show host / tv presenter who likes to see herself as a comedian and entertainer turns 43 but I think she could have made quite a career if she would have used her obvious talents more ( 40DDs at her best time ).

I´m not saying she should have done adult movies but her agent did her a disservice when he let her go in the singing / comedy direction when her body was clearly made for nude sex scenes in rated eighteen movies.



Two other hot cinema sexbombs celebrate their anniversaries on this very day. Eva Mendes ( 43 ), who was in two comic adaptions, none of them very good : GHOST RIDER, which is considered to be the " good " Ghost Rider movie after SPIRIT OF VENGEANCE and Frank Miller´s THE SPIRIT movie. At least you can see Miss Mendes´ naked buttocks in the last one.

You also get a quick glance at her fantastic backside briefly in Training Day.

Daimn, Eva has the prototype of a perfect heart shaped ass. I bet Denzel was really happy that she reconsidered quitting her acting career to star in that movie because you know he tapped those luscious latin nalgas  !



Speaking of naked buttocks and things that suck hard, if there ever was a movie actress whose full bodied, luscious lips were just made for giving men oral pleasure without end it´s skin flick veteran Rena Riffel who turns 48. The bendable blonde wiggled her whats - it in such cult movies like Undercover Heat, Showgirls and Striptease but also appeared in the god awful Mulholland Drive. Well, everybody can slip up. Anyway, she has upgraded a lot of bad movies with her appearances so thanks for that.

   
Since I covered most of Today´s birthdays last year - and I could not find a music video by MC Solar I had heard before - I want to include a few from the pile I usually skip. But since I am already hard one the razor´s edge about what is still safe for work I am wiling to include a few riskier ones.

Now Showgirls has gone from being the allegedly worst movie of all time to one of the most common guilty pleasures with a cult following and Rena Riffel who starred in it has even managed to finance a sequel Showgirls 2 - Penny´s From Heaven ( no, this is not an error since Penny is the name of Rena´s character in the first movie ). You can find the trailer and some clips at YouTube but there is no doubt that the production standards are not as high as in the original movie. Rena also starred in Striptease and I finally found the making off but I think I am saving that one until my next Demi Moore post and instead I am including the much post poned video with fitness guru Zuska Light ( I have no idea if that is her real name or what ) who could easily take it up with Jolene Blalock or Elizabeth Berkley.

I picked this one because of her outfit which really emphasizes her big bust and slender midsection ( just look at those ill abs ) and it being one of the few available in a high resolution and normally she explains every workout in a extra video step by step - how to do the exercises, possible alternatives if you can´t do strenuous exercises and how to breathe - but the embedding on that one has been disabled so you have to look for it yourself. And no matter if you actually do the exercise or just watch her doing it I am guaranteeing that at the end you will be covered in sweat.



The next video is not risky in a sexual explicit way but there is a warning before the actual trailer so I think it´s safer to put it here than in a regular post. This is for Stan Lee´s Lucky Man, a show I was not aware of which apparently is already in its second season. As far as I can make out the main protagonist comes into possession of a charm bracelet that grants its wearer constant luck. Which sounds like a dream come true but apparently this luck comes at the expense of others. I don´t know if this show is well known in America but here we didn´t hear anything about it. With all the constant buzz about upcoming shows like Iron Fist or Legion you might think they would make a bit of promotion for this but I guess the fact that they didn´t is because Stan Lee did not make this show together with the Disney guys. Does anybody out there have more information on this ?



I want to dial things down and close the post with a final birthday shoutout to the late great Jean Tabary who created one of the best comics in the whole world Iznogoud ( or Isnogud if you live in Germany ) about which I already wrote a lengthy post after his passing in 2009 .

Usually I don´t have that many comic related videos for my german readers but I found this clip - from arte naturellemente - about Jean Tabary´s son who seems to have inherited his drawing talent and continues the series.



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I want to be the caliph instead of the caliph !

World's Greatest Comics : Iznogoud

This post has a sad genesis because Jean Tabary, the mastermind behind IZNOGOUD died last month. My story with the series begins long before it got it's own album series, back around 1974, when it was one of the many comics to grace the pages of MV COMIX, which started as a Disney only comic ( MickyVision ) but which later included all kind of other comics.


It's where I read my first ARCHIE comics


and my first SUPERMAN stories, back then of course drawn by the uncomparable Curt Swan back in the days when we hadn't to rack our brains with all this pre - crisis, post - crisis, pre - reboot, post - reboot nonsense and Jimmy Olsen had the necessary scientific know - how to build his own Man of Steel house robot.


I guess back when Jimmy Olsen traveled through time by sitting on a time bomb and desecrated Viking remains for fun this wasn't too much of a stretch. There were also other comics from DC that appeared in MV COMIX like BATMAN, LEGION OF SUPER - HEROES or this strange one with that Christopher Chance fella.


Hmm, I wonder where I have heard that name before.....Christopher Chance.....hmm, I don't know.


Back to Iznogoud, I already wrote a bit about the comic series in this post but for all new readers who have no idea who he is, IZNOGOUD ( wikipedia entry ) was written by Rene Goscinny and drawn by Jean Tabary who carried on alone after the death of Goscinny. While the Goscinny period was characterized by "albums" comprising several short-length tales each, Tabary turned the series in a new direction, by dedicating every new album entirely to a single story, larger and much more detailed, usually revolving around a new unique concept.

The stories revolve around Iznogoud ( pronounced "is no good" with a French accent ) who is the Grand Vizier to the Caliph Haroun El Poussah. But that´s not enough for Iznogoud who always tries to become " Caliph instead of the Caliph ".


To achieve this goal he uses every possibility which in the comic are always entertaining things like a calendar that allows it´s bearer to travel through time by ripping off the sheets or putting them back with glue, a puzzle that turns the person you think of when completing it into this puzzle, or other magics that allow him to switch bodies with the Caliph.

Of course the Caliph is totally unaware of this and believes Iznogoud to be his best friend who in turn never succeeds.

In fact in most of the cases he has to suffer the fate he intended for the Caliph and even if he manages to become Caliph instead of the Caliph it ends in total disaster for him.


A typical example is when the Grand Vizier discovers the " Road to Nowhere ", a road that only leads back to itself, and devises a plot to lure the Caliph there so he will become eternally trapped. In his excitement over the prospect to accomplish his life's mission, Iznogoud forgets that he needs an exit for himself. Another plan involves freezing the Caliph, which has to be shelved because there always seems to be some source of heat nearby. Iznogoud also attempts to enlist the services of a primitive computer (described as a very clever djinni) in order to find out the answer to his perennial ambition. The temperamental computer ends up sulking when Wa'at Alahf answers a complex mathematical equation before it can. In the end, the only answer Iznogoud gets is the solution to the equation. As in every Iznogoud story, Iznogoud is ultimately unsuccessful, and the Caliph continues his reign.

The stories have been translated into several languages, including English, and the title has been adapted to animated and one live - action film that is not spectacular but quite entertaining and the resemblance between the main actor and the cartoon character is really uncanny.


The publisher Cinebook Ltd is currently publishing English language translations of the books in the Iznogoud series.


After MV COMIX Iznogoud was published by Ehapa and later by Delta in the french album format which I couldn't afford with my small comic budget. And most of that was spent on superhero comics anyway. But thanks to a library ( and later on the library bus ) in my region that was well stocked with french BDs I could read most of them.

Thankfully french comics like ASTERIX, LUCKY LUKE, YOKO TSUNO and other are still considered to part of culture in Germany, at least the part you can find in libraries.

Doing the research for this post I found out that there are different covers for the various translated editions. In some cases it's just a redrawing of the original cover.



On this cover a running Iznogoud is replaced by a pretty exhausted one who apparently has been running for some time.



Here the changes in the redrawn cover are more elaborate. While in the first version Iznogoud is jumping on his faithful servant, in the new version he's just throwing a tantrum jumping in the air in a hissy fit. Maybe it's not as acceptable now to use his slaves to vent frustrations.



In the next case political correctness also may be a factor in the changes. Not only was the cover redrawn but the title of the album was also changed. In La tête de Turc d'Iznogoud Iznogoud aquires a magic puzzle that shows the head of a turk and when you finish it the person you think of is transformed into this puzzle and his face appears as the new picture.

In the first german version the title was translated quite literally as Isnogod und der Türkenkopf because not only did it show the head of a turk but because a puzzle is a brain exercise and Türkenkopf is the german word for the earliest chess automats and later on chess computers.


In 1769 austrian inventor Wolfgang von Kempelen constructed a chess automat, a box with a magnificently garbed ottoman puppet, therefore called " der Türke ". To prove that the inside only had mechanics, Baron von Kempelen willingly opened the three doors of his automat.

Friedrich the Great lost against this turk and even Napoleon had to admit defeat to the chess turk in 1804. The secret of the machine was lifted 80 years later : a midget was concealed in the automat. He knew which moves his opponent made from hidden magnets in the pawns and could move his pawns by a sophisticated lever mechanism. In case the doors were opened he just slided away from priying eyes on a comfortable stool.

Sadly this automat, that was exhibited around the world, was destroyed by fire in the museum of Philadelphia.

At the time of the second edition the word Türkenkopf was not political correct anymore so instead the title was translated correspondingly. In french the term tête de turc stands for a scapegoat, a double meaning that is lost in the german version so they chose the more literal Sündenbock.


So I hope I could get you interested in this really brilliant book and if you want to read more about the english version just head over to ComicBits Online ( which you can find on the blogroll ) by fellow blogger Terry Hooper.


Before we come to the end of the post about one of the best comics ever made, Today we also have three celebrity birthdays I want to mention : hot singer and actress Christina Milian who turns 30


german sexbomb Coleen Fernandes who also turns 30 ( coincidence ? )


and Lysette Anthony ( 48 ) who is the only reason Mel Brook's DRACULA - DEAD AND LOVING IT will be remembered in the next few decades !

A spoof of Coppola´s DRACULA movie it didn´t do much finacially and the only reason why it´s still on tv in reruns are the hot vampire babes in the movie. I mean female vampires have always been sexy but Lysette really takes it to a new level the way she squeezes her big talents together.


Holy motorboat, Batman ! I´d let her suck me any time she wants - as long as she doesn´t drink my blood, if you know what I mean. Although, for a chance to do her I would even give a pint of blood. Damned, indeed.

I bet Steven Weber had to relieve himself between takes and you know he deliberately botched his text so they had to do a lot of takes of the scene.

I know, some readers don't approve when I'm amping the babe factor on the blog too much but I want to remind people that there are still happy reasons to celebrate. Happy birthday, ladies and many happy returns !

Today's clip is from the english version of the IZNOGOUD cartoon show.



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