Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Post number 100

While going through the stuff for my next post I realized that this is my one hundredth post. Wow. The big double o. That´s really something.


To tell the truth I wasn´t sure if I would last so long when I started out. It seemed that the more I tried to post the less time on the computer I had and the less opportunities to post. I thought the big 100th post would fall somewhere to the end of my second year since my average in the last year was about one post a week.

I guess I must have improved my quota.


Since this is the big 100th post I thought about what I could write about to make it a little special. I know the next thing I wanted to post was the next round of comicbaba battle but I think that just a run down of all the hot spiderbabes will not do today.

So since the name of the blog is TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN I want to do a more horror oriented post. I´m a big fan of horror - as in horror movies, horror literature, horror comics ( of course ) and last but not least hot horror hotties. So what better than a little introduction to what I like to call :

Comicbabe Battle Bonus Round : Horny Horror Hotties


Since the beginnings of comics there have always been different categories of comic girls : the good girls from next door, the hot wifes and of course the bad girls from the wrong side of the tracks. Since in the beginnings sex was seen as a negative thing in society ( at least from a moral standpoint ) in comics the bad girls were always drawn more erotic than their good counterparts. Now I have to question if that really led to the desired effects or if generations of comic readers were trained from earliest youth that the bad girls are hotter.

Nevertheless even without that angle there was always a connection between horror and sex.


Even in the horror movies there was also a moral underlying theme. Don´t believe me ? You can check out every horror movie from the 80s and it´s always the good looking, sexual active girls who die first. The girl who survives in the end is always the nice girl who doesn´t wear make up or sexy outfits and is still a virgin.

And of course there is also another thing that horror and sex have in common : both get your heart racing. And in a lot of horror movies sex is used to lure the unsuspecting victims to their untimely demise. No matter if it´s Dracula putting a spell on some virgin or a vemale demon using her bodily virtues to wrap some poor sap around her finger - in horror it´s always about high pulse rates and bodily fluids.

Which kind of suck as a segueway to the horny horror hottie to which this post is dedicated and who originally was intended as a finalist in the top five. The Mistress of the Dark herself : ELVIRA.


There is no one who´s more deserving of the title horror hottie of the century than Elvire a.k.a. Cassandra Peterson. The buxom playmate from hell with the complexion proves that even the lord of the underworld prefers his chicks without a tan. And while I usually like girls with more skin pigmentation this centerfold with a complexion is the exception to the rule. Elvira - the other white meat.


What more than everything else makes her the first lady of horror is that she has gone from horror movie hostess to pop culture icon. Often imitated but never duplicated there has been no other who is really in her league. Or anywhere her cup size.



As a horror fan I became aware of Elvira pretty early but besides a few photos in scattered magazines and a guest appearance on FALL GUY that was all. As a matter of fact I totally forgot about the episode till it later aired as a rerun on german tv. That´s also when I noticed that Heather Thomas ( who played the role of Jodie in the show ) filled out the costume a little better than Miss Peterson. Which means that either she was trully blessed by nature or she put a lot of Kleenex in her top to get that much cleavage.


So here in Germany Elvira did not get that much screen time but that all changed with her first feature film. Of course I had to go and see it in the theatre in Ludwigsburg. At that time there was this movie theatre called " Bali " directly at the bus station that had three screens. And in one they were always showing porn movies - I guess that was how they really made money. You have to know that at time the videocassette market was just starting out so if you wanted to see something you had to go to the movie theatre. You never knew when a movie would be put out on video.


So in one cinema they showed porn movies and in the other two movies they showed the movies the big cinema didn´t show which meant purely entertainment stuff like John Badham´s Number 5 or THE HARD WAY or movies like RAMBO, ROCKY or ROADHOUSE. And of course all the horror movies. I think I saw all the NIGHTMARE movies at that cinema. And the Elvira movie.

And I became a big fan. So you may ask why I did not include Elvira in the normal countdown ? Because not only is she the perfect combination of horror and sex but the first female of fright. And she does have a comicbook. But in my opinion it doesn´t live up to her standard.


I´ve bought a few issues and it´s more like a mixture of MAD magazine and COUNT DUCKULA than a comic book deserving to bear the name of the Mistress of the Dark. It should be more like a mix of PLAYBOY, TALES FROM THE CRYPT and MIGHTY AVENGERS. Something that has hard hitting horrorstories with a macabre twist, a lot of black humor and that can also depict the sexiness of the host with the most. Now that would be really something.


So I did not include Elvira in the horny horror hotties ranking but she nevertheless deserves a spotlight. So I added a few clips - more for my german readers - of Elvira hosting a tv show or on the tonight show with Jay Leno that was not shown on german tv.

A clip of Elvira hosting Elvira´s Midnight Madness showing the film She Demons.





Elvira hosts Midnight Madness - The Night Of The Ghouls :





A clip from the movie. Elvira dances the monster mash.





The best scene from the movie : Elvira busting a chain with her incredible bust.





Edit : here's a link I added to download " Search for the next Elvira " hosted by the first lady of horror hostesses herself and featuring Shelley Martinez who is currently busy as SALINA the girl on TNA wrestling's LAX team and former WWE goth diva Ariel

  • search for the next Elvira


  • And that´s the end of the Elvira spotlight. I don´t know what will be next - the " Spider babes " section or the rest of the horror hotties. But I don´t think that I´ll be posting anymore about Elvira.

    At least not before Halloween - if I manage to make a Halloween post. Last year I didn´t.


    Before I come to the end I want to say that over the course of the next months you are going to see some CIVIL WAR banners handmade by yours truly. I like to put one of them at the end of each post as a kind of signatuer and to show that the post is finally finished. Which in my case is especially important since I´m normally writing two or three days on one post. So the best way to know that a post is really " done " is to look for that banner or wait till I begin the next post.

    Now normally I try to find a banner that has something to do with the post and that´s pretty easy if superheroes or popular tv series are concerned. But I couldn´t find one of Elvira. So I spent almost the entire day ( I didn´even watch SPORTQUIZ or CHARMED today ) making my own banners with Elvira. And since it was so much work I will post a few of them.




    They´re a little crude and really big and I mostly used the same two templates but over time they will get better. I hope.

    New to the blog ? Everything you need to know about TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN :

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  • Be like the water my friend. Be like the water.

    3 comments:

    Anonymous said...

    Congrats on your 100th post! May you keep rocking the awesome for at least another 100, sir.

    SUBZERO said...

    Let´s hope so. Sometimes it just seems that even the gods are against me. But then I remember why I started this blog in the first place and it´s all worth it.

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