Regular readers of the blog may have noticed that this is a belated post since I am actually writing this after Gail Kim´s birthday. The reason for that is - as always - something I have been looking for for a very long time has suddenly popped up and it´s so important that I have decided to stop everything else and finish this first. I will explain what exactly was so important later but to give you an idea how bad the timing of it is I want to tell you that before this came up I had just finished my first Will Eisner tribute this year with 4 more still to wrap up plus 2 posts for wrestling sexbomb Tylene Buck. Anyway, I hope I can get this on the blog soon.
It won´t be all new stuff - I do not have time to pull off an entirely new post - so I will go with the old motto : something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. In any case I hope you enjoy this.
GEIL, GEILER, OBERAFFENGEIL, NOTGEIL, AM GEILSTEN, DIE GAILE KIM !
Gail Kim has been in a lot of different wrestling leagues and the first time I saw her was in the old ECW. She then went to the WWF before she arrived at iMPACT WRESTLING and for a while she did double duty at the WWE and IMPACT WRESTLING and I think at the moment she is officially retired from wrestling. At least I saw her give a farewell speech but in wrestling these career ends never last long. Except for those wrestlers you really want to come back. So maybe Gail Kim has really said goodbye to wrestling. In any case, I have always enjoyed her wrestling matches no matter if she played the good girl or the bad girl like when she returned to iMPACT WRESTLING.
As long as she gives her opponents a taste of " defeet " I didn´t care. I know I was not supposed to like her but her tight body just distracts me, like when she ambushed Velvet and her boobs almost fell out of her top.
Or when she uses her legs to choke her opponent while the ref counts.
And just check out Gail´s incredible glutes. Now if these cheeks don´t get your heart pumping faster you are either gay or dead so check your pulse.
I don´t know what it is about them but asian girls are my kryptonite !
And I don´t want to resort to racial stereotypes but they just have the extra oomph that works better than viagra and makes you hear " Me so horny me love you long time ! " in your head. Gail Kim is a very gifted athlete - and I mean that without any pun - but when I see how worked up she gets in the ring, the fire in her eyes when she plays the heel or the kind of punishment her body can take and especially how flexible she is.
I mean which red blooded potent male doesn´t want to see Gail Kim as a naughty school girl, in a wet t - shirt or wearing her ass in a tiny thong ?
Now the name " Gail " sounds like " geil " the german word for horny. So you can imagine that she´s only known in Germany as die geile Kim ( horny Kim ). Like Kylie Minogue who has been christened die Geile Minogue.
Back to Gail Kim, I remember a fight where she stopped her guy ( I think it was the guy from Beer Money ) from beating up his opponent with a beer bottle by knocking him out. While Gail Kim was distracted Miss Jaqueline ( who really should have shown her huge rack more often ) clobbered her from behind. And all the time Gail Kim was getting some hits from her all I could do was stare at Gail´s round bubblebutt while....well, you can guess what I did. Now I couldn´t find that particular match but here is a street fight with Jaqueline and Gail Kim where Gail wears some tight jeans.
By the way I have to give props to nubian sex goddess Jaqueline who seldom got as much play as she deserved for being an afro american wrestler with huge melons. She was one of the best contestants in the Miss Rumble Contest during the Royal Rumble in 2000 and her swimsuit barely covered anything and her giant 38E milkshakes were in full effect.
Also participating was Teri Runnels and not only did she wear a suit that left little to the imagination - her entire backside was practically naked - she also knew what the audience wanted and leaned wide over the top rope to the point where she almost fell off. Of course the WWE had to ruin the end - like they do in most bikini, swimsuit, wet t - shirt or other Diva contests that could arouse their audience - by bringing on some old wrestling fossils. I don´t know why they have to be such cockblockers.
Another great television moment in wrestling history had to do with the consequences of a fight in which Golddust lost Terri Runnels to Flying Brian Pillman and all the wrestling fans wishes came true when he made her wear a skimpy leather porn outfit. I don´t know if he really used Terri like a fillipino prostitute in his hotel room to vent his uncontrollable sexual stamina and nobody´s talking about it so we can get no real confirmation.
The line between manager, valet and sex slave has always been blurry in wrestling and it is a well known fact that Arne Anderson used Tylene Buck as his personal blow up sex doll because he claimed he could help her with her career and other members of the NWO - no pun intended - like Scott Hall frequently used all the valets for shall we say recreational purposes.
Later on the degenerates from Misfits In Action subjected Tylene to all night sex position warfare and she really served under canadian Lance Storm who together with the other members of Team Canada tag teamed relentlessly pumping the busty blonde until she became a willing member.
It is also common knowledge that Billy Kidman drilled Torrie whenever he could while the rest of the Filthy Animals really lived up to the name by taking turns banging Torrie Wilson´s pornstar body into submission when they were on tour. Which was on three hundred ( that´s right, 300 !!! ) days of the year. Rumor has it Konan was especially eager at taming Torrie.
I don´t have to tell you what a talented and record breaking athlete Gail Kim is : she was the first WWE diva to win a championship in her first match which was a seven - woman battle royal, she became the first TNA women´s champion in a ten - woman gauntlet match and has held that title five times and was TNA Knockout Tag Team Champion with Madyson Rayne. She won the TNA Knockout of The Year Award in 2007 and was voted Queen of TNA in 2013. She also has been Funkin´ Conversatoy Women´s Champion and the Diva of the Year in 2001 at the Apocalypse Wrestling Federation. She´s the number one female wrestler in the world according to Pro Wrestling Illustrated and thousands of fans worldwide.
But Gail Kim is not only good at dishing it out, like all asian women she can endure a lot of punishment which makes her matches so exciting for us.
Okay, time to spill the beans. The reason why I decided to do this post is that this is usually the part where I include the best animated GIFs of Gail Kim I have found on the internet so far but I had no idea from which photo shoot they were. And without the name finding out more about it was impossible. So for years I have been looking for anything I could find about this - I even made a special spin - off post where I put all of the animated GIFs of Gail Kim I found on the internet from that photo shoot so that I could find them later - but all I came up was zip. Zilch. Nada.
But life is funny that way and often you find stuff when you have already given up hope. In this case I was looking for wrestling videos to add to my Tylene Buck post when out of the blue YouTube suggested the Flashback : The Making Of The Knockout Valentine´s Day Special video and lo and behold this was the photo shooting I have been looking for all these years.
Now that I knew what the photo shoot was called finding out more was a piece of cake and I have also included the music video. Okay, so you might think that including two videos would not take that much time but as all the longtime listeners already know things are never that easy with me.
The thing was that all the GIFs I found on the internet were of rather low quality so as always I decided to make a few of my own which in this case took me almost a week. A few days ago I had done a whole plethora of Andy Sidaris GIFS because for some unknown reason I could suddenly make a GIF in a few minutes which would usually take me at least a day. Well, after doing all the screenshots and cutting them in two different sizes ( which alone took me three days ) things were suddenly back to normal.
I don´t know if this happens to anyone else but the free space on my laptop keeps disappearing. Before I started making these GIFs I had just made some free space on the laptop and I thought I had at least 8 GB to work with. Well, after I tried - in vain - to make the animated GIFs without reducing all of the screenshots in size ( because that takes a lot of time and I foolishly believed I could wrap up the Tylene Buck post that day ) I had only 2 GB left. Where the other 6 GB went ? I have no idea. The only thing left to do was delete stuff I hadn´t saved yet ( and which I hope I can find again ) and go for the long play or what I call the salami tactic.
Now you may have heard of the salami tactic but for those who haven´t it means that if you can´t achieve a goal in one big rush you have to take things slow and do one step after the other. Like with a salami where you don´t eat the whole thing at once but start off cutting down slices and continuously eat one slice after the other until the whole salami is gone.
In this case it meant that I had already done the first step. I already had all the screenshots I need although the fact that I had to use screenshots from two different videos ( because there are some shots of Gail Kim in the Making Of that are not in the music video and I always try to give my readers the best quality ) made things ten times more complicated. Also I could not use them in the way they appeared in the photo shoot and had to arrange them to make some kind of sense. Why should things be easy ?
So I already had all the screenshots but to use them I had to reduce them in size and to make halfway decent GIFs I went down to 50 percent. Which is not as bad as it sounds since in most cases the quality of the screenshots is not that good in it´s original size. This took some time because I had over 800 screenshots which meant that with the GIFs that are uncut I could not get them all in one GIF, but I´m already used to that.
What I did next was select the screenshots for the square GIFs. Since the size of the GIFs I can make is restricted by the longest side of the picture you always get the biggest one when the wide and the length of it are equal which means the size is a quadrat. This also means that you can´t use screenshots where what you want to show - in this case Gail Kim - is too long. Or you have to cut parts. Which you end up doing anyway when the camera or the person in the shot is moving. If you have to move the square it can be difficult and sometimes the end result is not that good.
With the first square GIF the camera in the first shot was moving from one side to the other and it was a pain in the backside to get it to the point where it looks seamless but I think I pulled it off. Oh, one small tip : never work with the actual screenshots. Always have a back up and always use a copy. In this case I had to do three copies : one for the regular sized GIFs, one for the square GIFs and one for the longer cropped GIFs in - between.
Speaking of cutting off parts of the screenshots, where it didn´t work out so well was with the longer cropped GIF. Which I normally don´t do. Usually I do the GIFs where you get the full picture and the square ones. But in this case there was a shot where the director of the video ( which might have been Christy Hemme ) used a mirror to get Geil Kim´s breast side AND her naturally perfect asian bubblebutt in the same shot. I have to remember this neat little trick if I ever continue with my new comic.
Anyway, to prevent my readers ruining their eyes I cut all the frames from the shot at the sides and because there were some parts I could not include in my usual square GIFs I cut them to the same size. In some instances it got a bit tricky but I hope the result is not too distracting.
So I am not sure how many days it took me exactly ( I didn´t get much sleep the last few days and the days kind of blurred together ) but after almost a week I have finally managed to make all the animated GIFs of Gail Kim from that shooting I am going to need for the forseeable future.
There may be some I have to do a few months down the line but since I now have all the necessary screenshots this should not be a problem. As it couldn´t be any other way now that I have finished making the GIFs I once again have more free space on the computer ( where did it come from ? where did it go to ? who knows ? ) but when I needed it it wasn´t there.
After I had finished making the GIFs I had to think about the next step and it was clear that my initial plan - including them in the Tylene Buck post that has the part about wrestling - was not an option. That post was already too long and had too many animated GIFs as it was that adding this would completely wreck the post. Also including them in the old posts was not better. After doing all the work just putting them there - and risking newer readers missing them - was not enough. Plus while I may put them in new posts it would be too much work to go through all of my old posts.
So I went through the post I had already done about Gail Kim - because I had the nagging suspicion that her birthday had not been that long ago ( which might have been just a crazy notion because making these posts can take longer than it appears and what feels like weeks to me may in fact be various months ) - and lo and behold : not only was Gail Kim´s birthday just one month ago, I also hadn´t made a proper birthday post.
Which brings us to the genesis of this post. Here are now most of the animated GIFs with Gail Kim from the Knockouts Valentine´s Day Special photo shoot ( with a few exceptions saved for future posts ) and while I am not going through all of my old posts to change out the old ones for the new ones I may do so on old posts where I have to replace a video.
In my past Gail Kim birthday posts I have always included a video about a manga series but since I am doing a quick post Today and I don´t have one about a manga I´m including another one - that still fits the topic of this post. It´s Solo by spanish creator Oscar Martin ( who previously worked for Disney which you can see in his style ) and it´s what I would call a brutal fight comic. It´s kind of Kamandi - The Last Boy On Earth meets Mad Max and sadly I didn´t have enough time during my last visit in Spain to look for it ( I am thankful I got out when I did because right now Spain is the third country most affected by the Corona Virus after China and Italy ) because while it has been published in Germany I don´t know if they did all his series. Anyway, if you like dystopian stories in a dog eat dog ( in this case it´s quite literal ) world then this is the book for you.
Music videos are always a problem with wrestling posts. Unless anybody out there knows any music videos with Gail Kim or Tylene Buck in it. And because I didn´t want to include a random Gail Kim music video I started to think about my favorite entrance musics. Which could take a few days especially when I include the classic one ( in fact a few days ago I tried finding one for the Tylene Buck post and came up with all kinds of ther music videos ) so I am going with the first that came to mind. This is one I always liked but I may be biased because of my heritage. Viva la raza !
Today I am really mixing it up with the videos and since some of my readers may have already grown impatient and seen all the episodes of Samurai Champloo Today´s cartoon video is a review from Brandon´s Cult Movie Reviews about an anime movie that is a korean rip - off of Tron.
Keeping with the fighting theme of the post we wrap things up with Private Wars from 1993 and if Holly Fiora who plays Ronnie Gilmore looks familiar you may have seen her as Krissie Valentine on the babes, bikinis and bullets series Acapulco H.E.A. T. ( the 90s were big on acronyms ).
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Hustle, Loyalty, Respect.
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