Thursday, January 28, 2021

Staton the obvious : he´s not just a Guy !

Welcome back to the third and final installment about Joe Staton´s run on Green Lantern and as promised in my previous Joe Staton GREEN LANTERN post we are saving the best for last which means that this post is about somebody who is not just a guy. Or one of the guys. No, he is THE Guy !

That´s right boys and girls. Today it´s all about the double punching Duke of Density, the obnoxious Overlord of Optimism, the Figaro of forgotten Finesse, the two - fisted Titan of Testosterone, the Master of Machismo, the one and only Guy Gardner and his exploits - first in the three part mini series GUY GARDNER : REBORN and then in his own ongoing series - that brought the myth, the man, the legend of the one and only - often imitated never duplicated - Guy Gardner to new heights undreamed of.


And if that sounds like a bit of hyperbole and that I am excited to write about THE best Green Lantern of all times you bet I am because so far I have had what I have now officially christened " Hell Week ". I should have started sorting through my late brothers comics and books but because I didn´t have any cartons to box them I had to wait until Monday. And on Monday I had to go shopping because we had run out of everything.

Besides doing the shopping I managed to find four big cartons but I could only carry two because the trolley was at full capacity and because it was so heavy and the way home from the supermarket was so long that I was out cold for the rest of the day. On Tuesday the people who were going to empty my brothers room came and were a bit disappointed that I hadn´t already taken out all the stuff that was supposed to stay here. Which I should have done on Monday but couldn´t. Because of shopping. So I spent the whole day schlepping comicbooks around, going through boxes, throwing away books and comics that were too dirty to resell. Basically making sure that anything we could sell on eBay like computer programs, valuable comicbooks or original art didn´t end up in the trash bin and at the end I was once again completely wiped out. Wednesday was Odinday.


I know, you probably think that I meant Thorsday - which is the old name for Thursday - but it was my Odinday going back to the old name Wodan for Odin because if you have read the old Jack Kirby issues of THOR you might remember that every other issue Odin couldn´t be bothered or was not available because he was sleeping the Odinsleep. Because only the Odinsleep can replenish his energies which was the only thing that kept the land of Asgard strong and vital. Well, back then it never made much sense to him but now I know how he must have felt. With all the antics Thor, Loki, the Warriors Three, Sif, Balder and the other asgardians had it´s no wonder Odin had to take drastic measures to catch some shuteye.


Anyway, Yesterday I was one of the living dead and Today I had to make an emergency dash to the bank to make a last minute money transfer and I think the guy from the lottery license shop shortchanged me again. The reason why it was a last minute affair was that somebody was coming over for some FREE COMIC BOOK DAY / GRATIS COMIC TAG issues and also to see if there were any other comicbooks he was interested in. Which was actually the best part of the day. Spending time going through my comic collection and reminiscing about old comic series with a like minded spirit.


In the end he parted with some of my most prized possessions like the GREEN LANTERN - FINAL NIGHT Collector´s Edition, the WEDNESDAY COMICS hardcover or my LEGION OF SUPER - HEROES collections THE GREAT DARKNESS SAGA, THE CURSE and the first two volumes of SUPERBOY AND THE LEGION OF SUPER - HEROES. And even though I only got a fraction of what they are really worth I will sleep better knowing they have found a good home. So yes, that was nice but apart from this small speck of bliss this week has been just a constant uphill battle and since I already have something else to do Tomorrow I am glad for this opportunity to return to the days of easier, more chilled out four colored entertainment. Man, I hope I can still continue my FLASH FRIDAY Tomorrow. Oh, that´s right.


I haven´t told you about the new FLASH FRIDAY project yet. Don´t worry, you haven´t missed a new feature on the blog. Longtime followers may remember that there used to be a quasi - regular, almost weekly FLASH FRIDAY feature where I went over selected issues of the second volume - especially the issues done by the late Paul Ryan - and you can find the links to all the posts in this post. Anyway, now that I have to get rid of all my comicbooks time has run out so I have started to re - read the FLASH run ( no pun intended ) because there are still at least two dozen issues I have not read yet including crossovers with other books like MANHUNTER.


I had planned to read the whole day but either my mental faculties are not what they used to be or I have forgotten how hard it is to read a lot so after the first two year´s worth of issues I had to call it quits. So last week I only came as far as issue 24 and I hope I can get a few more issues in Tomorrow. Initially I wanted to re - read all the 200 FLASH issues but if I can make it to issue 75 before I have to sell them I am content. Because I think the last issue I haven´t read yet is issue 70 and there is a crossover with GREEN LANTERN. Which brings us back again to the topic of Today.


As longtime readers know I don´t like to repeat myself and since I have already written about why I never liked Kyle Rayner as a Green Lantern and why Guy Gardner is the best Green Lantern ever - at least in my opinion - we can forego any long explanations and get to the good stuff.

We stay in the universe of the Green Lantern Corps with Geoff Johns who celebrated his 48th birthday on January the 25th and I wasn´t sure if I should include him because I used to have a love / hate relationship with his work which has now turned into this love / hate / love relationship.

Because on one side he has written some of my favorite comics like Stars and S.T.R.I.P.E. and the Justice Society of America books that followed.


As longtime readers know anything which gives us more Power Girl is okay in my book and Thy Kingdom Come is one of my all - time Justice Society of America stories . He also had a great run on Flash - which had most of its momentum stolen when Scott Kolins took over the art - his Teen Titans restart not only brought a lagging comic series back from limbo but also cemented Mike McKone´s cult status and for the longest time he steadily churned out instant Green Lantern classics like the Siniestro Corps War.


Not to mention his tour de force Final Crisis : Legion of Three Worlds where George Perez went totally nuts and drew every frigging person who was ever a member which is so awesome that I had to post all five issues ?

On the other side his Green Lantern stories got more convoluted and dark and negative until I left the title and apart from such short glimpses of his former glory as on the Aquaman restart I´m not a big fan of what he has written for the New 52 or the general direction in which he has lead the DC universe since becoming the new President and Chief Creative Officer.


And then there are shows like Smallville, Arrow and The Flash on which he has worked and which I absolutely love. I don´t know, I watch these shows and I ask myself if I am seeing the genuine love he has for these characters or if it´s only because there are also other writers involved who balance him out. Because every time I look at his recent comic book I see none of that love. It´s just full of disdain and negativity. Like being a hero is a bad thing and he´s trying to persuade us to not think positive, not to care about things and not to get involved or try to help others.


In any case, he has written some of my favorite stuff and everything else is not that important. Like somebody said : in comics you get to decide what is part of the continuity and what not and in a few years we won´t even have to pretend that the New 52 never happened because DC will find a way to explain that it was some parallel world or just a bad dream.

Speaking about dreams, french actress Florence Geanty turned 55 and she is best known for her role on the tv soap called Sous Le Soleil ( Under the Sun ) or simply St. Tropez in german and one of the few episodes in which she appeared was La Fin D´Un RĂ©ve which means The End Of A Dream.

Florence Geanty was perfectly cast as she plays the ex - stripper Marie ( Marion in german which made it a bit difficult to find infos on her ) whom the ex - cop of the series tries to reform. It´s not hard to see why and he even ends up marrying her but like in all soaps it has to end in tragedy.


Now very often women in soaps don´t look like they could really do the job they have on these shows - like Kyra Sedwick who in real life couldn´t scare a mouse - but Florence Geanty really has a porn star body that could have launched her into a very successful career as a striptease super star.


There also was another mega sexbomb on Sous Le Soleil, Lucie, played by none other than french boobsqueeze Julie DuPage who may not be known to american audiences but I first saw her on the french tv show Extreme Limite . The show was called Die Draufgänger in Germany which means The Daredevils so you might say that in some way it is connected to comicbooks even if in title only. I tried to find it on Blue Ray or DVD but there was another show of the same name later on and it´s the only one that you can find. In any case, nymphomanic Julie DuPage doesn´t have super big breasts but boy, did she know how to squeeze her funbags right.


Ah, that´s what I call poetry in motion, guys. Merci beaucoup, Julie !


You can find a much more extensive list of birthdays from January the 19th up until the 25th in this tribute to Gene Colan´s dynamic DAREDEVIL run from 2019 and just from January the 25th in this spotlight post on the spanish comics I read in my youth or my post on the first issue of Geoff Johns and George Perez FINAL CRISIS : LEGION OF THREE WORLDS series.


We continue in the realm of comicbooks on January the 26th with Sal Buscema who celebrated his 85th birthday. He was one of my favorite artists growing up and even though I was not as excited to see his art as I was whenever his big brother did an issue he brightened many issues of Die Ruhmreichen Rächer - how the Avengers were called by the publisher Williams Verlag. It is something nobody in Germany seems to remember.


Coming back to Sal Buscema he did most of the issues of Marvel - Team Up when I started reading comics so in most cases he did the first version of a lot of super heroes I saw. Throughout the years there have been many books he illustrated that I came to love like his fabulous Rom, Spaceknight series where I have a lot of the issues ( not all of them ) and still hope Marvel finds a way to reprint them so I can buy - and read - them all over again. I mean they managed to put Shang Chi, Master of Kung Fu into four nice omnibus hardcovers so the least they could do would be a few Epic Collections. Speaking of Rom, Spaceknight that is one of the two issues missing in the Secret Wars II omnibus together with Micronauts because both of them are licensed properties where the print rights had expired.


Since I mentioned Marvel Team Up, Sal Buscema also did his share of world building in the webbed corner of the Marvel universe and in 2018 I did a post on his amazing 100 issue run on Spectacular Spider - Man .  Which I also would like to see in trade. I got the Spider - Man : Tombstone trade but that came out four years ago and I would like to continue reading.


The post also includes links to earlier Sal Buscema posts for new readers.



There is a tribute post about all the different books he worked on that I wrote in 2015, another post I did in 2014 where I talked about his run on The Incredible Hulk - ( which lasted 10 years ! ) where I also mentioned other favorite periods in the Hulkster´s history, a second Hulk post where I listed which pages were missing in my french issues of Gamma and a Hulk post to pimp volume 7 of the Essentials which was offered for just 8 bucks at amazon. Last but not least I posted issue 1 and issue 2 of Amazing Spider - Girl where he inked over Ron Frenz and in 2017 I did a special Thorsday post about one of my favorite Mutant Massacre crossovers .


In 2020 I managed to write two posts, a spotlight on Rom, Spaceknight and one with the complete original art for issue 273 of The Incredible Hulk.


No longer with us to celebrate his anniversary is Paul Newman whom I always got mixed up with Steve McQueen. Probably because when I was growing up you got either one or the other in all the good movies. Of course now I don´t confuse Paul Newman with other actors because he´s the one in the movie Cool Hand Luke ( known as Der Unbeugsame - The Unbending in Germany which is the same title The Natural with Robert Redford got here ) with real life Power Girl Joy Harmon´s famous car wash scene. Never underestimate the effect giant, wet boobs that are pressed tightly against glass can have on the memory. Just ask Simona Ventura .


And you can find an extended spotlight with the best GIFs of Joy Harmon in my spin - off post about Phil Foglio´s adult comic series XXENOPHILE.


STOP WORRYING AND ENJOY LEIFHEIT or GOING THE EXTRA ( RED ) MILE

Our next candidate is for my german readers since Fabian Harloff who celebrated his 51st birthday on January the 27th has appeared on shows like Notruf Hafenkante, GroĂŸstadtrevier or SK Babies. Generally all shows where saving civilians is involved which includes all the SOKO tie in shows which are a dozen. He also was the storyteller on Teletubbies which was very odd because I first saw him as one of the villains on Die Rote Meile.


The series was named after the red light district of St. Pauli in Hamburg and was a sequel to The King of St. Pauli. It followed the lives of pimps, prostitutes and strippers but they were all portrayed like regular people not like in american tv where people from this walk of life are always horrible people. Anyway, I watched every episode because they had a very easy concept : one strip in every episode not interrupted by commercials.


Daimn, that girl really has the prototype of the heart shaped ass. Longtime readers know that one of my pet pevees on this blog is celebrating all the brave actresses who turn insufferable dreck into bearable entertainment by taking their clothes off or at least show what their Mama gave them and who don´t get enough recognition for that . And there were some on Die Rote Meile as I found out when I tried to find the names of the best strippers. Yes, only the " real " actors are mentioned in the cast meaning those with a speaking part which tells you which place some women still occupy in Today´s society. So if anybody out there knows the name of the living blow up sex doll with the big melons below put it in the comments.

Anyway, one of the best strippers of the regular cast is Sylvia Leifheit who has a secret identity in the series as she plays the typical devoted wife by day, secret stripper by night. Sylvia made me realize two things : firstly, while I usually don´t go for skinny chicks she is just oozing so much sex appeal that I would do her in a minute. And second, hair color can really make a difference because her character in the series is actually a blonde and despite having the same stunning figure as a blonde she´s kind of - meh - looking while as Luna with the black wig she´s a real firecracker !


A few years back I got the complete first season of Die Rote Meile on DVD at amazon at a pretty decent price and I´m glad I seized the opportunity because it really goes for ridiculous prices now. I can really recommend this show and Sylvia Leifheit alone is worth the price of admission.


Now I couldn´t find out much about real life Power Girl Eva Chaloupkova who turned 55 since you can´t find a biography, her measurements or any piece of personal information. What I do know is that with her giant - sized melons she would have had no problem playing one of the strippers on Die Rote Meile and it´s one of the big mysteries of the universe how she ended up as a newscaster instead of making a fortune as a porn star.


Although she is not the only newscaster whom I mentioned on the blog who was born for porn and one of these days we should have a global wet t - shirt competiton with busty Eva Chaloupkova representing the Czech Republic, Oana Andoni from Poland, Lianna Grethel from Colombia, Carolina Alcazar the stallion from Spain, Busenwunder Tatjana Ohm from Germany and all natural 34DD boobcaster Enki Bracaj from Albania to determine which is the breast in the world. But that will most likely be a dream.


Coming back to erection guarantee Eva Chaloupkova, with my sexual predilections towards newscasters with giant breasts it´s unbelievable that this is her first time in my celebrity birthday countdown and the only explanation for this oversight may be the lack of information about her. So if you have any intel on Eve please let me know in the comments below.


Comic legend Frank Miller celebrated his 63rd birthday on January the 27th and there are two things you automatically think about when you hear the name Frank Miller. Now I haven´t done a post about BATMAN - THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS but I already mentioned Frank Miller in this post in 2015 that was an overview of the DAREDEVIL series and my post from 2017 was all about DAREDEVIL issue 181. Since I don´t like to repeat myself and I tend to throw my readers a curve ball from time to time my Frank Miller post from 2018 was all about his work on the Spider - Man related books and we returned to DAREDEVIL in 2019 with a BLACK AND WHITE post.


Like I have often said I only include playmates I am familiar with and as I was just graduating from school in 1984 a lot of them fall into that period.


1984 in particular was an exceptionally good year for playmates as not only Andy Sidaris stars Dona Speir ( March ) and Roberta Vasquez ( November ) appeared inside the famous men´s magazine but also Karen Velez who turned 55. With her 37E - 23 - 35 measurements it´s no wonder that she not only became Playmate Of The Month in December 1984 but also the first puerto rican Playmate Of The Year in 1985. As a geek trivia she was married to Six Million Dollar Man / Fall Guy Lee Majors from 1988 to 1994.

Andy Sidaris was probably THE BEST director of action movies for adults and his cast is a WHOS´S WHO of playmates : 40DD Playmate Of The Month November 1984 Roberta Vasquez , hot 34D Page 3 girl turned sex therapist Ava Cadell , 41D Penthouse Pet Of The Year 1993 Julie Strain , Samantha Phillips, 34D Playmate Of The Month May 1994 Shae Marks , 36D Penthouse Pet Of The Month February 1993 Julie K. Smith , 34C Playmate Of The Month September 1993 Carrie Westcott or Dona Speir to name just a few.


And I just wrote a spin - off post with all the usual links to Janet Jones Gretzky and real live Power Girl Leslie Easterbrook who had the most famous scene in Police Academy 4 - Citizens on Patrol in which she emerges from a pool in a wet t - shirt . And while the obligatory Andy Sidaris actresses / playmates / sexbombs like Roberta Vasquez , Ava Cadell , brunette Cynthia Brimhall, Dona Speir , Julie Strain , Shae Marks , Julie K. Smith and Samantha Phillips are mentioned the main part is about blonde brabuster Monique Sluyter and the obligatory plethora of Tutti Frutti girls .


Now usually I just include a short part with them in the posts but this time I did a somewhat longer version so I could include all the new download links I found while writing this post. I just recently included a whole slew of new ones but those are just for compilation and mixes while these new ones are not only for entire episodes - which are always ultra rare - but for german episodes which are even rarer. Some of them even include my favorite Tutti Frutti girl ( whom you can see just below ).


You can find a few more celebrity birthdays from January the 26th and one from the 30th in the intro for my first post on Joe Staton´s Power Girl , just from the 26th in my THORSDAY WITH SAL BUSCEMA AND X - FACTOR post and just from the 27th in my Frank Miller DAREDEVIL post from 2017 .


And you can find all the other playmates I missed to mention in January in the first part of my seven part ( !!! ) Hugh Hefner tribute series from 2020.


Coming back to the subject of women with humongous breasts, I should mention torrid teaser Ariel Winter who celebrates her 23rd birthday Today.


I have to admit that I am not up to date on her status but since it has been a while since I featured her on the blog - and I still have a lot of videos with her bookmarked - it´s about time we paid her a return visit.

A TALE OF TWO TITTIES or THE ( ARIEL ) WINTER OF OUR DISCONTENT

As always I am late to the party as I missed the whole outrage about Ariel Winter getting a breast reduction because she already had a 37F breast at the tender age of 15. Which is a bit weird because whenever I write one of these cult siren entries where it states that the person in question got a really gigantic rack at a really young age there are always a few who do not believe it and say that it is an urban legend and that girls that are so young don´t get very big breasts. I mean, how big can boobs get ? Well, this time it happened in front of the whole world so nobody can deny it.


Everybody saw it - except for me. Because I could not get through the first season of Modern Family thanks to the non linear story telling. I really tried to get into it because I always saw those clips of Sofia Vergara on the internet with her overdeveloped double airbags bouncing around and spilling out of her generous cleavage that give you an instant erection.


And Ed O´Neil is in it who was just brilliant on Married With Children. So what could go wrong ? Well, here´s where the poop hit the ventilator : I can´t follow the episodes. First of all in the old comedy shows you had something like a clear linear story. Something happens that sets the story off, the people try to deal with it and in the end there is the resolution.


On Modern Family several things happen but they are not related and just random stuff and in the end the episode is just over without any kind of resolution or having dealt with anything. You only know that the episode is over because the next show starts. And on DVD you just see it end.


Also they are constantly talking into a camera but it never is explained who they are talking to or what the tape is for so you have the creepy feeling you are a voyeur going through somebody else´s home videos.


So I could not continue watching Modern Family and wouldn´t you know it, right after this the show becomes a babe party with a revolving door of sexbombs. First you have latin mega MILF Sofia Vergara who not only has a tireless body that drives men crazy ( if you look in the dictionary under ultimate latin wet sex dream there is a nude picture of Sofia Vergara ) and an insatiable sex drive that can tame any rod, the bigger the better. No, she also turns any schlong party into an impromptu ejaculation sensation / squirt marathon with her massive mammaries which is the reason why I cast her as buxom brazilian boob queen Beatriz da Costa a. k. a. Fire in my first post about Casting the Justice League of America movie . Although her breasts seem to have shrunk from a 40DD ( !!! ) in 2015 to a mere 37F.


Then there is the sexy Sarah Hyland who had some hot bikini scenes in Modern Family and who could ever forget her Ă¼bererotic performance at Lip Sync Battle that put the Pussycat Dolls to shame ? With those natural born stripper moves she got the porn star genes for an adult movie career.


And then there was Ariel Winter who finally turned the show into a boner bonanza. With a name like that you either have to become a porn star, a wrestler or a character in the Frozen sequel. And while Ariel sadly didn´t do porn it seems that nobody told her boobs about her nixxed skin flick ambitions because they started growing at an exponential rate each year until she had the same huge breast size - 37F ( !!! ) - like Sofia Vergara.


God, her giant melons were pushed almost up to her chin by this dress !


Now I know that there are people out there who want me to condemn any woman who reduces her breast size. And as a confessing fan of big boobs there is a part of me that weeps for every woman that has her breasts made smaller not just because I will never get to britzki her ( which in most cases is not really a factor since I would have no chance to do that with most women anyway ) but also because there are so many women out there with small breasts who would give anything for big breasts. There are so many women who are not happy and must suffer.


But - but - I have always said that women should decide for themselves if they get breast surgery no matter if they want smaller boobs or bigger boobs. Because at the end of the day it is their body and they have to be happy with it. It should be the only criteria but I know that sometimes there are outside forces that influence such decisions. Also I have had surgery a few times in the last ten years and I can tell you no matter what kind of operation you have it´s no picnic. So if somebody like Ariel Winter does want to get her breasts reduced she must have a good reason for it.


Since there are not many videos about playmates on YouTube I´m going with Hard Ticket To Hawaii which seems to be the internet´s favorite Andy Sidaris movie to review. Now longtime readers might have expected the usual Markie Post / Heather Thomas bikini double whammy whenever I mention Lee Majors but we will have to safe it - as well as the obligatory episode of The Fall Guy - for a post with a less crowded bonus section.


Since I have already run out of Green Lantern cartoons I am going with another feisty redhead in honor of Guy Gardner : Anne With The Red Hair which I think was originally called Anne Of Green Gables. I know that I  am not the target audience for this but what the heck, one day I caught the first episode and was so intrigued that I kept watching and the fact that it annoyed the flark out of my younger brother was just and added bonus.

This is the only complete german episode I found on YouTube but you can continue with the english episodes. My favorite one is when Anne wants to bake a cake for her best bosom buddy ( which is a term Anne uses a lot ) and because Marilla put her licor in one of the bottles for the baking ingredients she gets her completely plastered. Chaos and drama ensues.


We continue with another video for my german readers especially those who are wrestling fans as we have Ben Brumfield a.k.a. Joe Williams and Rochus Hahn a.k.a. Horst Brack, der Bestrafer ( who took the name after Marvel Comics The Punisher ) reminiscing about cult tv show Catch Up !


I had to leave this video out the last time we talked about Daredevil because Kevin Smith was already in the Man Without Fear documentary about the creators behind the series and in the episode of Inside Of You of that particular bonus section and no offense but three videos about Kevin Smith in a post that is not about his birthday might be a bit much.

Most people have probably already seen it but for those few unfortunate ones who haven´t here is No More King´s brilliant video Sweep The Leg directed by none other than William Zabka that got Cobra Kai rolling.


We end Todays post with a rare internet find : 1954´s Ulysses starring Kirk Douglas. I posted this before but it was deleted and since I can´t fix old posts thanks to the new blogger interface I am re - posting it. I saw this for the first time with my late brother not in a movie theater nor on tv but at the local school which used to show classic movies for the general public from time to time. It´s still the best adaption I have seen although there are some parts of the story that were cut out. But there is a very good Ulysses tv production starring Armand Assante that shows those parts so both of them make a good double feature. This film was an italian production shot in the famous DeLaurentis studios and at its time it was the most expensive color movie with a production cost of 10 million $.


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