TALES FROM THE KRYPTONIAN: April 2025

That's right, before finally closing the door on JUSTICE LEAGUE MONTH there is a special issue that I need to post. And it's not even an issue of any incarnation of THE JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA but rather an issue of the post INFINITE CRISIS series of JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA that crosses over with the Justice League and features everybody's favourite super - heroes from exactly 1,000 years in the future as special guests.

So yes, I am talking about part four of THE LIGHTNING SAGA called Three Worlds - at least I think it does because my interlac is a rusty - written by Geoff Johns ( back when he was a terrific writer no pun intended ), pencilled by Dale Eaglesham and inked by Ruy Jose. And yes, that is the infamous cover to JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA 10 where the late, great Michael Turner got a bit too enthusiastic let's say about Power Girl's big power girls and had to decrease them in size a few times before the guys at DC Comics gave the green light. I bet that's one problem Michael did not have on his own books where he could draw women's breasts as big as he wanted. Although I do not think there were any especially busty women in FATHOM or any of the other series Michael Turner published.

As for the picture above I know that it's not the first version because in the collection where I got it from there is the published cover with the logo and stuff and Power Girl's chest is considerably smaller there. I just don't know if this is the first version or if this was already toned down.

Speaking of Dale Eaglesham, he is an artist I thoroughly enjoy - even if it can be difficult to follow the series he is working on - so I want to do a little public service announcement just for my readers in Spain. At the moment the first volume of the FANTASTIC FOUR BY JONATHAN HICKMAN omnibus hardcover is offered at amazon Spain for 65 Euros - including package and shipping - which is a steal compared to the regular price of between 100 and 108 EUROS. This is the second time it is offered at this price since the last two weeks it had risen to 75 Euros. I thought about ordering it the first time when it hit the 65 Euros mark but I hesitated too long so this is my second chance to get it cheap. Now the reason why I hesitated was that not all the issues of FANTASTIC FOUR in this volume are drawn by Dale Eaglesham. Granted, some are drawn by the great Steve Epting ( about whom I have written quite a number of posts on this very blog ) who is just phenomenal but some are drawn by an artist who tries - and very unsuccessfully at that - to copy Brian Hitch's style.

Which I find a bit funny because as some of my visitors who have been here longer might remember when Brian Hitch did his run on FANTASTIC FOUR he had adapted a new art style that helped him draw quicker so he could keep the deadlines and this new art style did not go over too well with the readers. I wrote about this and if I can find this post I will put the link right here . As for the quality of the story by Jonathan Hickman I have to say that I am not always a fan of his big ideas like on AVENGERS where he clearly neither understood the assignment nor the team and what makes the Avengers tick but FANTASTIC FOUR is the book where everybody can agree on that he hit it out of the ball park with this one.

So if some of my spanish fans want to check out a good FANTASTIC FOUR run and are one of the few people left on the planet who have not read this yet now is your chance to get the book at an excellent price. Plus I gather that with the upcoming THE FANTASTIC FOUR movie ( for which I have not seen any trailers yet because I do not want to know anything before seeing it ) this sucker will only go up in price. Man, I just hope that with the movie FANTASTIC FOUR gets a bit of an attention boost with general audiences because it is a - pun intended - fantastic series.

Okay, now that we are done with our good deed for the day let's finally get to our issue of JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA that is part four of The Lightning Saga, the reintroduction of the Legion of Super - Heroes into the post Infinite Crisis DC universe. As the member of the Justice League of America and the Justice Society of America find out in this issue the visiting Legion of Super - Heroes members have not been one hundred percent truthful about their real reasons to travel exactly 1,000 years to the past as they plan to partake in a special ceremony with which Legion of Super - Hero afficionados and Superman are just too familiar with and it all has to do with the mysterious yellow rods they brought with them.

And that's all I am going to say about that issue so better get ready for the clash of not two but three super hero teams and more legionnaires that you can shake a life restoring lightning rod at. Long live the Legion !

like lightning

stuff

links

videos

weisinger

inspiration

finally back in print

history

power girls

brian hitch at his best

crow

Yes, this is the James Bond movie with not so desperate cult siren Teri Hatcher and martial arts legend Michelle Yeoh ( whose character really should have gotten her won spin - off movie ) and speaking about the breast live action Lois Lane it is only fitting to includer in this post since she got her own Legion of Super - Heroes themed spotlight post since she played Mon - El's Mom ( and naturally delivered another of the all time greatest MILFs in television history ) on the CW show about Supergirl.

SUPERMAN'S GIRLFRIEND TERI HATCHER : THE BEST THERE IS ...

of Lois & Clark, The New Adventures Of Superman with my favourite Lois Lane in live action, not so desperate 38C - 22 - 33 former cheerleader Teri " I'm not a stripper ! " Hatcher .

Teri is still the gold standard when it comes to portraying Lois Lane since she was the first actress who made it believable that Superman chose a mortal over such ultimate sexbombs like Wonder Woman or Big Barda .

During the Bronze Age the character of Lois Lane made the transition of a woman whose only goal was to trick Superman into marrying her - who just happens to be a reporter - to a bonafide reporter and she frequently went undercover to get the scoop. In the tv show they did a bit of that but with a wet sex dream like Teri Hatcher on the job they could have done much more if they didn't have to deal with tv censorship. There could have been a story where Lois and Clark pose as a criminal couple in the vein of Bonnie and Clyde and to make it more convincing they put on a sex show for the horny gangsters who are secretly observing them.

Of course they hit a snag when they find out that the boss of the outfit used to have a fling with the woman Lois Lane is substituting - and when I say fling I mean that he slam - fucked the slut's brains out six ways to Sunday with his giantsized horseschlong - so to keep her cover Lois has no other choice than to let him use her as his personal blow up sex doll.

Check out my last post on cult siren Teri Hatcher to read more about her comic book connections like her appearance in Tales From The Crypt or Tango & Cash where she showed her incredible body and dancing skills .

Speaking of Tango & Cash it is often cited as one of the most 80s movies of all times which should be no surprise since it came out in 1989 and so caught the 80s at their height but also gave you a taste of 90s excess. It goes without saying that the exotic dance by Teri Hatcher - who really knows how to do those high kicks - alone is worth the price of admission.

Daimn, with those legs for miles and her pornstar body Teri could really inflict some serious damage and I bet there were many special late night rehearsals where she pumped Dean Cain dry to the last drop making him squirt like a fire hose again and again and again until he could not get it up anymore. Teri drove him insane and completely wore his schlong out.

Now as hot as she was Teri Hatcher was not the only sexbomb on Lois & Clark and so it was only natural that 40C - 25 - 35 Ueber cougar Tracy Scoggins caught my attention especially since she was often wearing bikinis that were so skimpy that it's a wonder they passed the tv censors ( maybe it was because in the 90s bikinis were big on tv shows like The Bikini Open or maybe Tracy had a deepthroat session with the board of censorship behind closed doors ) as Daily Planet gossip columnist Cat Grant ( who was co - created by Marv Wolfman and Jerry Ordway ).

Men milking machine Tracy Scoggins was also part of franchise Babylon 5 by none other than J. Michael Straczynski, acclaimed writer of series like RISING STARS and MIDNIGHT NATION ( and you can find my list of Top 5 Comicbook Series By J. Michael Straczynski in this Gil Kane post from 2016 ) especially the tv movie River Of Souls where she wears lingerie.

Now in the erotic skin flick movie Alien Intruder from 1993 tittilating Tracy Scoggins gets completely naked playing a sadistic nymphomaniac big breasted computer virus who hijacks a virtual reality sex program to slamfuck some lucky guys to death. Tracy was perfectly cast for this as she could draw inspiration from her vast sexual experience in real life.

Another main attraction of Babylon 5 - at least for the male audience - is Commander Susan Ivanova played by brabusting brunette 36B - 25 - 38 science fuck - tion cult siren Claudia Christian although I heavily doubt she was allowed to wear an outfit as skimpy as this one on that show !

Claudia wore that little number on the undeservedly underrated film The Hidden delivering a surprisingly professional and raunchy striptease that not only helped the movie gain a loyal male following over the decades based on Claudia's participation ( some people even go as far as Claudia's bonerinducing striptease is the only reason the movie is still shown on tv ) but also earned her a top spot in my TOP 10 MOVIE STRIPTEASE list .

Coming back to The Hidden, in the movie bi - sexual Claudia Christian plays a stripper which is a role Claudia was clearly born to portray !

She is taken over by a sex addicted alien parasite and the first thing the alien does with the stripper´s porn body is literally fuck a guy to death.

Which apparently she tried to re - enact with Kyle MacLachlan for a few weeks in a nearby no - tell motel where she used her relentless body and her ability to spread her legs like a fillipino hooker to pump his dick dry.

Man, Kyle really got to bang some grade a born for porn sexbombs during his career since not only deepthroat nymphomaniac Claudia Christian milked his horsecock dry until the last drop in a hidden motel. Nobody can tell me that he didn't drill all natural 38C - 22 - 35 showgirl Elizabeth Berkley without mercy during their uninhibited sex scenes in the pool .

legion duneybele

pierce brosnan playing a russian super spy

from russia with love

houston knights

bonus wrestling with leia miau as cheerleader daimn

german power girl cindy

best ever

streetfighters

this is just a tribute

brothers

denise richards

denise richards on seinfeld

the full clip

which lead to this scene

cleavage

julia louise dreyfus was so hot

dat shirt

wild things

full frontal in her most famous scene from Wild Things - for which she could have used a body double but she declined.

In the threesome with Neve Campbell and Matt Dillon that secured her a place in the Nudity Hall Of Fame Denise's breasts became the focus of several storyboards that were sent back and forth between her lawyer, the producers and the director in order to determine how much of her spectacular bosom would be shown. At first they only wanted to film one breast but thankfully both ended up on the screen. And while Robert Downey Jr enjoys much fame for his role of Iron Man it has to sting that Matt Dillon got to motorboat Denise Richard´s champagne - covered wet perfectly shaped boobs instead of him. There have been sequels to the movie but none reached the level of the original for obvious reasons.

troopersbele

mike hammer

One I still vividly remember was episode six from season two of Mike Hammer called Bonecrush in which a 22 year old Janine Turner played a nymphomanic ( aren´t all women in this series nymphomanic, especially the buxom Hammerettes ? ) horny sexbomb which she had no problem pulling off thanks to Janine´s bonerinducing 40C - 22 - 37 measurements.

Every normal, red - blooded guy would have done her in a minute but as always in the show since Mike Hammer knew her for such a long time he saw her more like a little sister than a born for porn sexual partner. One of Janine Turner´s breast scenes is when she tries to get Mike aroused wearing a super ventilated red shirt. That shirt had so many cleavage windows that it was basically just a lot of thin stripes which only barely covered her spectacular breasts leaving not much to the imagination.

When Janine´s character didn´t manage to get Mike aroused she was - understandably - miffed so when Mike´s only remaining friend in the police department ... at least his only male friend. As he seems to have an unlimited supply of female acquaintances willing to do whatever Mike Hammer needs them to do in the hopes of getting a big taste of ye olde patented 150 percent satisfucktion guaranteed Mike Hammer meatpole.

Like the thirsty, big breasted real life Power Girl below played by none other than PLAYBOY´s Playmate Of The Month for March in 1982, blonde 34C - 23 - 33 blow up sex doll extreme Karen Lorre formerly Witter ( you can read more about the buxom beauty in the big finale to my Hugh Hefner tribute series from 2020 ) and whom regular blog readers might remember since she appeared in a few episodes of Mike Hammer, most notably in the episode Kill Devil with her famous picture album scene.

Sexy Karen also had bit parts on Trapper John M. D., Cheers, The Vineyard, The X - Files, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, NYPD Blue and Malcolm in the Middle. She also appeared in the movie Another Chance.

From 1990 to 1994 Karen had a contract role as the 4th Tina Lord on ABC´s soap opera One Life to Live, for which she was nominated for a 1991 Soap Opera Digest Award for Outstanding Female Newcomer in Daytime.

And to close the part about Busenwunder Karen Witter she later played Nemesis in Hercules : The Legendary Journeys, in the seventh episode.

Coming back to Janine Turner´s character, after Mike Hammer spurns her proposition to assume the position ( or more likely the positions since she intends to have sexual intercourse with Mike many positions in all night long ) Mike Hammer´s only remaining - male - friend in the police departement walks in and she blatantly asks him if his old friend Mike has some performance problems with his little Mike. Which is the only reasonable explanation for not slambanging Janine Turner´s brains out.

Another erotic highlight of her career is TAI PAN in which Janine Turner doesn´t wear only one, nor just two but at least three different dresses that show off her breast features. And when I say " show off her breast features " I mean expose her upper body completely while still managing to cover her nipples. It´s like she´s advertising motorboating and the only thing that is missing is a sign that reads " Best double breasted dick massages in town. Special offer : bring one friend and get a deepthroat blowjob for free. No age check. " I have no idea how the costume person got away with this or if it is even historically accurate and I don´t care.

Speaking of Janine Turner's mouthwatering mammaries, as far as casting her in a superhero movie - when she was in her prime of course - while it is not based on an existing comicbook she would have been perfect for the role of Majestic of the spoof series Society Of Virtue, especially if she would be wearing the original costume - which leaves nothing to the imagination so Janine could have displayed her flawless pornstar body here - instead of the prudish lame outfit Majestic gets in later episodes.

As for which episode I would adapt, it's either the one where Janine Turner gets plenty of screen time showcasing Majestic's breast costume - as well as her erection guaranteeing gazongas - from all angles or a new one. This would be a follow up to the episode called " XXX " in which the team surprises a group of actors shooting a porn movie parody of them and decide to take over to make the movie more realistic. As one might imagine this new episode would show the team actually shooting the porn movie and the main focus would - of course - be hot Janine Turner.

It goes without saying that as the director of this episode I would have insisted on rehearsing all the sex scenes before shooting and at Janine's request this would have taken place at a five star hotel at an undisclosed location as she knew that shooting a bonerinducing scene with too many people around always ended up with everybody taking turns at taming her. It's a dirty job but somebody has got to do it and I would not only have made the sacrifice to slam - bang Janine's brains out six ways - and six days - to Sunday during these gruelling sex scene rehearsal marathons I would also have taken the job of stunt cock to shield her from perverts.