Saturday, February 11, 2023

It's a Texeira Spirit of Vengeance Saturday

Yes, once again the time has come to rev up your engines, burn the midnight oil and patrol the cemeteries to see if there is some evil doing afoot that cries out for some leather clad, metal spiked, skull burning, bone shattering vengeance with Ghost Rider courtesy of Mark Texeira.

Now with eight still unfinished posts in the works at the moment I should not start another but if life has taught me something in the time I have spent back in Spain it is that it is much easier to start a lot of posts now and worry about finishing them later than to finish your posts and plan to write other posts later only to learn that all the material you have prepared for these posts was deleted or is otherwise unavailable to you.

More than that while I would be just too happy to turn the rest of this month into an ASIAN SENSATION SEXBOMB month I don't think most of my readers would appreciate to find a post about stunning Miss Bikini Korea 2019 Lim So Young right on the heels of another post about 44D - 25 - 35 cosplay blow up sex doll Yaya Han even if it is not like most of her posts since it is mainly about casting her as the big breasted evil Lizard Lady from THE TROUBLE WITH GIRLS and so it has more comicbook content.

Anyway, with doing this impromptu Ghost Rider post I can tame two asian sexgoddesses with one schlong as I get to put something comicbook related between those two ... posts, I mean posts - there is something else entirely different I would put between Yaya Han and Lim So Young.

The second bonus is that I finally can give my readers the Mark Texeira post I couldn't write on his birthday. Plus since I already put all the links to my previous Mark Texeira spotlights in the Bart Sears birthday post I wrote on that day - because they both share a birthday and Bart Sears created the best version of Power Girl and big breasts win over flaming skulls every time of the year - we can get right on to the good stuff.

THE GHOST OF THINGS PAST : SLEEPING WALKERS, TROUBLED GIRLS

Funnily enough this entire trifecta of posts started with the Ghost Rider because I was looking for more material for a post and one of the artists who took over after the departure of Mark Texeira is Bret Blevins - who we all know from his work on books like SLEEPWALKER, NEW MUTANTS, the INHUMANS graphic novel or STELLAR - and while looking for some GHOST RIDER art by him I found the pages from his THE TROUBLE WITH GIRLS mini series that was published under Marvel Comics Heavy Hitters label ( because as much as that was a watered down censored version of the original series it was still too outrageous for main Marvel Comics to put out ). Which then led to me finding all the pages from the Comico series which then led to me writing the new Yaya Han Lizard Lady post where I tried to include Lim So Young but because there were too many incredible pictures with her I had to give her her own cult siren entry.

Which then led to me writing this post to act as a buffer between those two posts to prevent my readers from busting from all that released sexual hasian energy. Now that is what I call posts lead to other posts.

Now before we get into it there are two things I must mention, namely that all of the stories in this part were written by Howard Mackie and the original pencil artist was Javier Saltares while Mark Texeira joined after issue 4. This infernal trio was a force to be reckoned with and I remember that when the first issue of the series hit it " slapped so hard " as the kids say nowadays that Ghost Rider became so hugely popular it created its own cottage industry in the 90s with more or less successful spin - off comicbooks like SPIRITS OF VENGEANCE and MIDNIGHT SONS.

The second thing is that as my longtime followers know I like to have a topic or overarching theme to a post even if it is just an art showcase for Mark Texeira and in this case I thought about how I could make this post special. Well, one of my personal highlights of the early issues and a real WTF moment where not only me but the collected comicbook fandom s - worded in their metaphorical pants was the return of the original Ghost Rider as an obviously grizzled and disillusioned Johnny Blaze appeared to kill this new incarnation of the spirit of vengeance - even if the cost was to spill the innocent blood of one Danny Ketch. So most of the pages in this post will be from that storyline. And for good measure I also threw in some pages with Spider - Man who did not approve of this new Ghost Rider's handling of the Hobgoblin who had just been turned into a real hobgoblin and acquired demonic powers in the bargain. Oh, I have also planned another Ghost Rider post - and when I said another I naturally mean two or three posts - where Johnny Blaze has a kind of team up with a certain Doctor and let me just say : it is not whatever you think.

Man, going through the material for this post I have to say this is the gold standard for me. And I don't want to sound like a broken record so instead of getting hung up about the fact that I used to own all of these issues I only want to mention that no comicbook fan worth his salt can understand why these issues have not been released as an omnibus while far inferior stuff - like Jason Aaron's run or the ridiculous COSMIC GHOST RIDER crap - gets the royal treatment. The only reason I come up with is that IF they reprinted this run they could not sell any of their current GHOST RIDER books because everybody would become aware what a huge pile of horse manure they are selling their customers right now.

Anyway, there is no sense in getting all worked up over stuff like this so let's start the bonus section with one of these ever so popular top tens.

GHOSTS OF HOLLYWOOD WITH LUKE CAGE'S ( SPIRITUAL ) BROTHER

This one is all about the spookiest super heroes and it probably won't be a big surprise to anyone that Ghost Rider is at the very top of their list.

The video is from Watchmojo Deutschland - which I did not even know existed - so expect to see more of these videos in my following posts.

Next up we have a video with the man himself and while it is already one year old I count myself lucky to have found one at all. Mark Texeira's work is not celebrated much right now - again probably because it makes most of the current comics by Disney look like fanfic ( especially since all these so - called writers can do are stories of self insert characters that only resolve around who is outed as trans next ) - so it is great to see his artwork even if the projects he mentions are old at this point.

Since I have already written ad nauseum about Ghost Rider's adaption to the big screen and the small screen I will let the video speak for itself.

The only thing I want to add is that compared to the new movies that come out from the current MCU like Thor : Love And Thunder or the She - Hulk tv show ( which I thankfully managed to avoid ) the 2007 Ghost Rider with Nicholas Cage looks like a damn Oscar winner even if Today's millenials make fun of it. Much like Roland Emmerich's Fantastic Four movies I have liked this movie since it came out and thanks to most people classifying it as cringeworthy camp ( at best ) it has become a guilty pleasure. There are just a lot of great moments in this and most of them have to do with the inclusion of Sam Elliot as the OG Ghost Rider.

ALL I WANNA DO IS ZOOMA ZOOM ZOOM ON EVA'S LATIN BOOM BOOM !

One of the most disappointing things about the first movie is that it completely underutilized latin 40C - 25 - 36 love machine Eva Mendes.

Who has not had much success with comicbook movies but in Frank Miller's awful adaption of comic book legend Will Eisner's The Spirit at least we got a quick glance at her bubbly buttocks. And she also showed her completely naked backside in Training Day with Denzel Washington.

Eva Mendes really has the prototype of a perfectly heart shaped ass.

Which is the best shape for doing it doggystyle - and we all owe Denzel Washington a debt of gratitude for convincing Eva Mendes for not giving up on her career, making this film but most of all doing this nude scene.

Which according to insiders Denzel not only rehearsed extensively with Eva in his trailer but on the days they shot the actual scene he made Eva come earlier than the rest of the crew so when they arrived on the set Denzel had already been method acting Eva's brains out for a few hours.

Now I don't know if there were any wild and uninhibited sex marathons going on between Eva Mendes and Nicholas Cage at the set of Ghost Rider after the rest of the crew had left for the day and they also could have continued their out of control fuck orgies when they reunited while filming The Bad Lieutenant : Port Of Call - New Orleans but I doubt it.

Not because Eva Mendes is not an ultimate men milking machine that has a lot more to offer than just one of the best latin butts in movie history.

But because both were in a relationship at that time. Eva Mendes was dating George Augusto and Nicholas Cage was married to korean 36D - 25 - 36 knockout Alice Kim so I guess he had no sexual complaints at that time because we all know that life sucks but dem asian girls deepthroat !

LIFE LESSONS WITH NICOLAS CAGE : COMICBOOKS BEFORE BITCHES

You know, Nicholas Cage sure seems to suffer from the same obsessions as I do because besides being a huge comicbook fanatic ( he changed his name from Nicolas Coppola to Nicolas Cage because one of his favorite heroes was Luke Cage a.k.a. Power Man ) and he also likes asian women because after Alice Kim he married japanese lotus flower Riko Shibata.

Before that he was married to real life 42D - 27 - 36 Power Girl Patricia Arquette ( who was one of the first candidates I chose for my SEARCH FOR POWER GIRL series over at my old boob blog although I never wrote her entry ) - from 1995 to 2001 so he also likes blondes with big breasts.

And like me he lost his entire comicbook collection. Unlike me he didn't do it to go to another country but rather to appease his then wife Lisa Marie Presley and it didn't surprise me when they got divorced because when you sell your comics to keep your woman you end up with neither.

And I'm certainly no expert on women - as anybody who is reading this blog over a prolonged period of time can surely attest to - and I am not saying that you should place comicbooks above everything else in your life. But the fact alone that your partner is making you choose between them and what is your passion is a clear sign that they cannot accept you as you are. And this should be the first alarm bell going off to warn you that something in this relationship is clearly not working and it's not you.

Since I don't want my spanish readers to feel left out ( if I still have any at this point ) we are taking a look at another Nicholas Cage movie that never got high praise from the critics but was a success at the box office and garnered a loyal cult following over the years : Con Air co - starring such great actors like Colm Meany, John Cusack, Ving Rames, Danny Trejo, Steve Buscemi or John Malkovich. Man, Nicholas Cage has one of the most interesting imdb movie lists because one half are these artistic and critically acclaimed films while the other half are big blockbuster action movies that us normal folks just love to watch ( and re - watch ).

FAST BIKES AND FAST WOMEN : SMOKERS, RENEGADES AND STRIPPERS

Now talking about movies with motorcycles and bikers the first thing that comes to mind is of course the very underrated Harley Davidson And The Marlboro Man starring Mickey Rourke and Don Johnson ( and we will come back to the latter later on in this post ) and I wanted to include the breast scene from that movie. But as it could not be any other way the best part of the scene was cut and originally the video I had included here had no age restriction - since it is the italian version which sadly has a lower quality - but since then YouTube has put out its feelers so now it has an age restriction and you can only watch it on YouTube . You know sometimes I feel like these guys do this only to sabotage my blog.

And yes, the guy who hassles Nash Bridges Don Johnson in that scene is played by Branscombe Richmond who is probably most famous as Bobby Sixkiller on Renegade and I was really tempted to include an episode of that show but as longtime followers of the blog know I am not such a big fan of the series and I have already posted a few of them - including the episode that guest stars PLAYBOY's Playmate Of The Month for May 1994 and frequent Andy Sidaris actress , brunette 44E - 23 - 34 bra - busting XXL blow up sex doll Shae Marks as a mega busty lingerie model ( Duh ! What else ? ) - in my latest EC Comics spotlight post about Al Feldstein .

For me the only reasons to watch Renegade are the many hot sexbombs who frequently guest star on the show but most of all Lorenzo Lama's ex wife natural born 38C - 24 - 36 stripper super star Kathleen Kinmont .

She is hampered by the restrictions of tv censorship but if you want to see her turn into a total nympho slut without any sexual inhibitions check out The Corporate Ladder which also sports skin flick veteran Meilani Paul, all natural 34C - 23 - 33 Playmate Of The Month February in 1995 Lisa Marie Scott and 40B - 25 - 36 Bond girl Talisa Soto . Man, talk about a quartet of ultimate sex goddesses who can pump any cock dry.

GHOSTS ( AND GHOULS ) OF THINGS PAST : EC COMICS HORROR !

Since I mentioned EC Comics my spanish readers might be interested in two posts from MAN OF BRONZE about the spanish reprints by Diablo Comics of Tales From The Crypt Volume 4 and Weird Science Volume 4 .

At the moment my EC Comics library is extremely limited : besides the spanish edition of the first volume of Weird Science I only have the EC Covers Artist Edition, the EC Comics sampler Choke Gasp ! The Best Of 75 Years Of EC Comics and the reprints of Tales From The Crypt, The Vault Of Horror and The Haunt Of Fear that I used to pad out the boxes when I shipped some comics I could not sell to Spain which I can't bring myself to throw away no matter how beat up and battered they may be.

As a big fan of EC Comics I´ve done a number of posts on the subject : I did a special black and white tribute post to William Gaines in 2017 with two full stories, one by Johnny Craig and one by George Evans, in 2018 I did two posts, one for the horror books and one for the other titles EC published and I also did special spotlight posts for Jack Davis and a black and white post with the complete original artwork of the story And All Throughout The House by Johnny Craig from THE VAULT OF HORROR 35.

I didn´t write any EC Comics posts in 2019 but in 2020 I wrote a post in honor of the late William Gaines with stories by Johnny Craig, Graham " Ghastly " Ingels and Joe Orlando - who got a spotlight post - as well as one in tribute to the late Bernie Krigstein and two about Johnny Craig .

And back in March 2021 we had the obligatory William Gaines tribute .

Besides publishing the best comic in the genre of horror, science fiction, war, crime fiction and many others ( which every comic fan or comic book creator worth his salt needs to read to understand what you can do within the medium ) he also created a whole new genre with the creation of Mad magazine when his competitors, censorship and the Comics Code Authority forced him to cancel his most successful titles.

One of the artists who got the famous MAD Magazine off the ground and running with Harvey Kurtzman was Will Elder and if you are interested in comic history, good satire comic magazines or just good art you should check out those early issues - you can read my spotlight post on him .

Now besides being a master at cartooning and bringing slapstick humor to the printed page Will Elder was very adept at depicting the female form which probably was a very big factor in MAD´s rise in popularity.

Will Elder´s faible for drawing sexy women was also the reason why Harvey Kutzman chose him to bring one of his most famous creations to life : PLAYBOY´s LITTLE ANNIE FANNYa spoof on LITTLE ORPHAN ANNIE.

As my faithful followers know I jump at the chance to include any type of EC Comics content so we return to my spanish audience with Buck Fernandez' review of the very underrated Tales From The Crypt : Demon Knight. Because it is so underappreciated a lot of people forget that Billy Zane was in two comic adaptions. If you don't count the demon Etrigan .

Our next video is kind of a re - post and also it isn't because while I have already posted the Vault Of Horror movie it is the latin dubbed version.

FAST BIKES, FAST WOMEN PART 2 AND GOING TO THE MATTRESSES

Since I also mentioned it earlier, somebody who would be perfect for starring in an xxx - rated Little Annie Fanny movie is czech real life Power Girl and all natural Busenwunder Sonia Edde ( I would even volunteer to conduct her casting couch auditions ) and I still couldn't find any info on her bonerinducing measurements so if anybody out there can help me out with that please let me know in the comments below.

Coming back to movies with manly men, busty babes, motorcycles and bikes you cant get more 80s than with the sci fi action classic Megaforce.

While I couldn't find Megaforce on YouTube I did find something as cool ( or at least interesting ) : a movie about Evel Knievel, the guy Johnny Blaze's character in the comicbooks was based on, with George Hamilton ( best known as the gay Zorro and the only Dracula with a tan ) as Evel.

Of course I can't mention Evel Knievel and comics without mentioning The Human Fly which was a blend of made up super hero and real life stunt performer. The legend goes that when stunt man Rick Rojatt went to the Marvel Comics office to pitch the Human Fly he first came dressed up as his own chauffeur and then pretended to fetch his boss but he just put on the Human Fly costume and went in a second time. I don't know if that was just a publicity stunt or he really was a split personality but at some level you just have to admire that dedication to portraying a role.

Whom without a doubt every red blooded biker in the 90s would have loved to take for a ride - or a spin on his motorcycle - is blonde 39E - 24 - 36 bra buster Becky Mullen whose biggest claim to fame besides taking her clothes off on the german strip show TUTTI FRUTTI and starring in the Andy Sidaris movie Hard Hunted as the bikini clad or topless assistant of radio DJ and sex therapist ( in the Andy Sidaris movies as well as in real life ) Ava Cadell was her guest appearance on sitcom MARRIED WITH CHILDREN where she not only plays one of Al Bundy's perfect wifes in a dream sequence and even gets to wrestle with bonerinducing 44E - 22 - 34 Baywatch babe Pamela Anderson at the beginning of her big career .

SINFUL INTRIGUE or HOW ( NOT ) TO TRAIN YOUR BECKY MULLEN !

For skin flick enthusiasts there are plenty of midnight classics where Becky Mullen can really strut her stuff most notably Sinful Intrigue , where she plays an ultrahot babe ( Duh ! ) whose a - hole of a husband takes advantage of the hapless sexbomb by constantly putting her porn star body to the sex test and trying to get her to do some extremely pornographic and slutty hardcore stuff that she is not comfortable with.

Now mind you, her husband is not an a - hole because her always wants to have sex with her. If I had been married to a busty blonde men milking machine with a body like Becky Mullen during my sexual prime I would have banged her brains out six ways to Sunday 24 / 7 ( at my current medical condition any attempt at sex with such a wet dream would probably kill me but what a way to go ). It's also not the fact that he tries to get her to do more hardcore stuff because that is also relatable.

No, the main reason why he is such an s - word - y husband is the way he goes about the entire thing. I mean, I'm no expert on women ( and really everybody who knows me will confirm that ) but I have heard that things like bringing your hot wifey some flowers or pralines, take her to watch a movie or surprise her with a romantic candlelight dinner go a long way at making girls feel more comfortable and open to sexual intercourse.

You might even try something like foreplay once in a while. But no he goes straight to the " Wham, bang your back out, not even Thank you, Ma´am ! " fuck marathon where she has to spread her legs like an asian hooker while he pounds at her most sensible body parts like an out of control jackhammer until he shoots his load. And the worst part is that when his wife manages to get really into it despite her husband handling her like a chinese bull handles porcelain he never lets her finish so she is always unsatisfied. What a dork. Apropos asian hookers, I almost wrote that he treats his wife like a prostitute but besides abusing her he also cheats on her every chance he gets like with his nymphomanic hasian porn masseuse Mai - Ling ( really, like there are no other names for asian women, but that´s Hollywood for you ) played by ultrahot Chona Jason, whom he definitely treats much better. This asian nuru specialist gives him a Happy Ending massage - one of the best scenes of the movie.

I wrote more about this - as well as Becky Mullen's tenure as Sally, the farmer's daughter on G.L.O.W. Gorgeous Ladies Of Wrestling in my recent RETURN OF FLASH FRIDAY : DER ROTE BLITZ post but the reason why I'm bringing it up again is that I didn't get to include the 1991 Hard 'N Heavy Babes video calendar which is all about babes and bikes. Becky Mullen is only one of the hot women featured as she was well know for her participation in music videos like David Lee Roth's Sensible Shoes .

Another video I didn't get to include is about the new G.L.O.W. tv show and I can't even tell you what it is about since I haven't watched it yet - neither the tv show nor the video - because I want to avoid spoilers.

LIVING IN THE DIANE LANE - FROM STREETS ON FIRE TO HIGH LANDS

Keeping with the theme of Today's bonus section our music video is from one of the most underrated cult movies in which Michael Pare ( who is one of my favourite underrated actors although he does not always choose the best projects ) fights the leader of a biker gang - played by the OG Green Goblin Mister Daniel Dafoe himself - to free Diane Lane.

Which doesn't sound that far fetched once you have seen Diane Lane in real life because she has to be protected at all costs. How lucky were Christopher Lambert to be married to such an angel for six years and Josh Brolin who even was living his best life as her husband for nine ?

As for Christopher Lambert, his quintessential movies are of course Highlander ( we'll ignore the sequels as I am sticking to the motto There Can Only Be One ), The Hunted ( one of my favorite white guy caught in ninjas vs samurai BS movies of all times ), Fortress, Mortal Kombat ( he is still the best Lord Raiden ) and Subway by Luc Besson from 1985.

In fact Highlander was so successful it got its own tv show that followed a descendant of Christopher Lambert's character and the highlights of the show were clearly the episodes where Christopher guest - starred.

Since I don´t like to repeat myself too much go over to this post to read more about Christopher Lambert's and Luc Besson´s films like Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. And you can find an overview of the cartoon show in my Christmas post from 2021 which also includes the first episode of the Highlander tv show - but in a much lower quality.

SOPHIE MARCEAU'S SEXY CHOICE : IF YOU GOT TITS FLAUNT TITS !

You also can´t fault Christopher´s taste in women because after being married to Diane Lane - who showed her stripper skills in The Big Town - for six years he gave it to the wardrobe malfunction prone queen of explicit nude scenes, french ( in every sense of the word ) blow up sex doll Sophie " Tits Out " Marceau at every chance he got 7 years long.


Not to mention that he dicktamed italian 34C - 25 - 35 Busenwunder Francesca Dellera which lay the groundwork for Alain Delon who took advantage of the fact that her defenses were down and merciless used and abused the helpless born for porn model like a cheap fillipino hooker until she became his obedient sex slave making all his dreams cum true.


Man, Christopher Lambert banged some of the hottest nympho sluts in showbiz and I easily have to put Sophie Marceau on the top of that list.


Longtime readers recognize her from my very first post of CASTING THE JUSTICE LEAGUE MOVIE where I cast sexy Sophie as Catherine Cobert.

The french sexbomb is best known in the US for appearing in the Bond flick THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH, and outside for taking her clothes of in such classics like MES NUITS SONT PLUS BELLES QUE VOS JOURS ( my nights are more beautiful than your days ) or DESCENT AUX ENFERS ( Descent into hell ) . Where she appeared in nude scenes with Claude Brasseur who played her father in the romantic hit comedies LA BOUM and LA BOUM 2 which caused all kind of outrage at this perceived incest.


Her first nude scene was in HAPPY EASTER with Jean Paul Belmondo which I had but I never got round to watch it and now it´s too late.


She was 18 at the time she made the movie and payed the movie studio Gaumont money to get out of her contract to be able to do nude scenes.


What a trooper. In the movie she´s Jean Paul´s lover but when his wife returns a bit early from her vacation she says she´s his daughter from his ex. Sophie also starred in the horror movie NE TE RETOURNE PAS ( don´t turn around ) opposite Monica Bellucci which is like a dream sandwich.


I always do the super hero casting bit and with her giant - sized melons the mega stacked italian sex goddess would be a natural choice for the amazonian puppy princess of Themyscaria. She definitely would have no problem filling out the Wonder corsage with her 42C " Wonder Twins ".

I put her in the finale of the Hollywood Edition of Casting The JLA Movie series as Wonder Woman but now I´m tending more towards Big Barda.

BORN FOR PORN : BIG BARDA AND BIG BREEDA ( NOMEN EST OMEN )

In the original FOURTH WORLD comics by Jack Kirby - and this definitely changed in the NEW 52 - Big Barda was built like a brick shithouse with the personality of a lady trucker, the muscles of a bodybuilder, the hot measurements of a playmate of the year and the cupsize of a porn star.

She got that from her even bigger breasted mother Big Breeda, the fiercest female on Apokolips who - nomen est omen - was therefore selected by Darkseid himself for breeding the next race of warriors.


I don´t know if it was because she spurned his advances or if he just thought she would produce the best offspring but it is implied that all the serial rapists she defeated used her like a cheap blow up sex doll !


All for the next generation of Akopolips´ finest of course. Now with Big Barda the melons didn´t fall far from the tree and when she began to develop, especially in certain parts of her anatomy that had to do with procreation Darkseid decided to let her follow in her mother´s footsteps and - like mother like daughter - personally introduce Big Barda to the breeding pens to continue the family tradition. So as soon as she got wind of his perverted plans for her Big Barda decided to ditch Apokolips and hitched the next ride to Earth. According to Big Barda she managed to do that before Darkseid had a chance to break her in but maybe she was so eager to join Mister Miracle because she had tasted the Darkseed.

For more on DC´s creepy sex stories with Big Barda - like when Barda starred in a porn movie with Superman who later claimed he could not remember a thing - check out BIG BARDA : DEATH, LIES AND VIDEOTAPES.

GHOSTS OF SPACE : FROM OUT OF THE THIRD WORLD TO THE FOURTH

And if you want to read up on more FOURTH WORLD old school comics - that are not done by Jack Kirby - old link partner COLLECTED EDITIONS has reviews of Mister Miracle by Steve Englehart and Steve Gerber, New Gods by Gerry Conway , Fourth World by John Byrne omnibus ( which is one of the few omnibus books in my new comic pile since I never read the series when it came out and was always curious about it plus you can never have too much John Byrne comicbooks in your life, right ? ) and the Orion omnibus by Walter Simonson ( best known for his iconic THOR revitalization ) and I can't recommend the last one highly enough.

After Jack Kirby nobody does cosmic space opera like Walter Simonson and it's worth getting this based on the strength of his artwork alone.

The only problem with the book is that is collects all of the bonus short stories in the back of the book which angered uncle Walter to no end.

Because when the issues came out originally each had a backup story which in most cases tied directly into what happened in the main story giving the readers more background information on the history of New Genesis, Apokolyps or the characters in the story. This way you got to see more sides to the characters and they gained more depth because that were things you could not address in the main story because of space.

Putting the main story in the front and then putting all of the bonus stories in the back you have a grandiose story first and then a massive chunk of info dump where you often go : " Okay, that's good to know but I wish I knew that going into that issue. " But what's done is done and it does not look like they will do a new edition anytime soon ( they did reprint the stories in the correct order in the new trades so you might want to go that route ) and even so it's worth getting the omnibus book.

Right now it seems to be out of print and I don't know how the prices are actually for omnibus in general - like most things the prices have risen considerably thanks to COVID and the war in the Ukraine - but you may find a copy in good stocked comicbook shops. If they still exist out there.

BORN FOR PORN FILMS : CASTING THE ( SARAH LOUISE ) YOUNG ONE

Originally I cast Maria Grazia Cucinotta, the italian mega MILF with the giant 39D ( !!! ) melons as Big Barda but keeping in mind her history I may cast her as Big Breeda. Not only to get Maria to do nude scenes that way but also because I could cast Monica Bellucci as Big Barda and give the Wonder Woman role to british 90s porn superstar Sarah Louise Young.


We could even have Sarah Louise Young wearing the mega slutty 1990s Mike Deodato sado maso leather outfit . Plus this way we would get to cast an additional sexbomb as anal fixated amazon Artemis and the two had to compete for the right to the title of Wonder Woman in a Last Amazon Standing Double Dildo Penetration Party Weekend. That would be right up Sarah´s alley who has a huge fanbase in my home country.

Yep, she was a big star over there in Germany when I was old enough to rent porn videos. That shows you what an old geezer ( and old pervert ) I am. Also, she was the first one who made porn videos for a price that horny teenagers like me could afford. I mean, new tapes. Because back in those days you could buy used videos at the store but those were watched hundreds of times and only seconds away from combustion.

Not only was Sarah Louise Young the first porn actress to agree a fee of $1,000,000 for a single film, in 1992 she also opened her first sex shop in Hannover, named Sarah Young Erotic Markt, and there would eventually be eleven such shops located in german cities. I think there might have been one in Stuttgart but with all the movies she starred in and the ones she produced Sarah Young was very present in german video stores and sex shops around the time I was old enough to watch her movies. By the time she lived in Spain she also had one of the first adult magazines that were sold together with a videotape. Which here in Spain were sold at newsstands next to comics or newspapers. Yes, some countries do not hide their porn under the table like it´s something to be ashamed of.

Coming back to Sophie Marceau, not only does she drop her clothes very often she also shows great cleavage like in THE MUSKETEERS REVENGE ( or The daughter of D´Artagnan like it´s called in Germany ) that has one of my favorite scenes with her. D´Artagnan´s daughter ( Sophie Marceau ) is captured by the villain of the movie to be sold off to a brothel, but only " to the sleaziest one where they waste the whores very quick " as she says. The guy who has to sell the bitches starts complaining that at the price he has to get for her he´ll never get rid of her. At which point the woman tells him that in this case he should be glad, ripping open Sophie´s shirt and revealing her gorgeous breasts which shuts him up.

GEISTER DER VERGANGENHEIT : LEBT WOHL DEUTSCHE ORIGINALE

One might think finding a segueway from french sex goddess Sophie Marceau to german cult comic Didi & Stulle might be difficult because the relationship betweens germans and the french might not be always the best but I did find the story La Boum. Nope, it's not what you think.

Reading my blog one can get the impression I didn't like growing up in Germany ( especially in the past because I miss the old homestead more now that I am in Spain ) but there always were some things that made me appreciate my german upbringing. A lot of it has to do with those small german underground comics that are tied to specific regions and are almost impossible to explain to outsiders. Didi & Stulle is one of those, a creation as much of its time as its place - in this case Berlin - and the strip by Fil was first published in a local city magazine how so many independent german comic strips do before they become famous.

Speaking of german cult series, I just came across this the other day and since it is a rare treat to find full episodes of german tv shows in good quality I wanted to include the first episode of Ein Fall fuer Zwei ( A Case For Two ) with Guenther Strack and Claus Theo Gaertner for all my german readers who may have wondered how Matula made the transition from a respected police officer to the cynical disillusioned private eye.

This show is really well known in Germany and ran from 1981 to 2013.

Rather obscure is Dead And Buried from 1981 especially in Germany and even I never heard of the movie before this video. One of the reasons why it never got much exposure in Germany is of course the FSK - the german censorship organisation ( they claim to be a youth protection agency but that is just an excuse to control people ) - which happened to a lot of horror flicks. Well, there you have it from praising german culture right to exposing its corrupt system in the span of two videos.

Anyway, I am sure that my german readers are already waiting for each new installment from this channel because you always get a lot of new information even if the subject are well known cult classics. Since I have not seen Dead And Buried - and I did not watch the video because of the spoilers - I can' tell you too much about it. I will nevertheless mention that besides Freddy Krueger himself Robert Englund the actress Melody Anderson might look familiar to some of my visitors since she was the female lead in Chuck Norris Firewalker although her most famous role is Dale Arden in Dino De Laurentis 1980 comicbook adaption Flash Gordon.

While the dancers in the leather boots in this video do a fantastic opening the focus sadly shifts from them to the dancers with more clothing for no apparent reason. Anyway, the songs are indeed the title song for the tv series 77 Sunset Strip but also the Peter Gunn theme.

THOMAS GOTTSCHALK DROOLING OVER MUTTER TERESA ( ORLOWSKI )

It is next to impossible to find videos that are safe to post with 36E ( !!! ) - 24 - 36 porn superstar Sarah Louise Young but just the other day I came across an episode of the Gottschalk late night talk show with Sarah's biggest rival in the industry which was none other than Hans Moser's previous wife Teresa Orlowski who also spawned an entire porn empire.

She was one of the first entrepreneurs who started a satellite tv station just for adult movies and I remember the headlines of the german yellow press like BILD Zeitung that warned the unsuspecting populace about " Teresa Orlowski's porn rays from Outer Space ". The quality of the video is really bad at the beginning but gets better after a few minutes.

It really shows Thomas Gottschalk's character that not only is literature critic Marcel Reich Ranizki more open and laid back then him but Thomas is such a horny old hound dog that he is trying to find an excuse to make a porn movie with Teresa Orlowski while at the same time trying to get approval or at least a pass from the german public. He is pussy whipped.

MARS NEEDS WOMEN - BECAUSE WE ALREADY HAVE MOTORCYCLES !

The best known motorcycle gang in cartoons is probably Biker Mice From Mars which has become a Disney property since it was made by Marvel Productions. Yep, Stan Lee was one of the executive producers on this but I am not sure if he had input on the character designs or the stories.

Since I could not find an episode of 77 Sunset Strip in spanish we have another Twilight Zone episode. This one is called Opening Day and features Martin Kove who is known for Rambo : First Blood II and for playing John Kreese in the Karate Kid movies and Cobra Kai. Funnily enough he also guest starred on the aforementioned Renegade tv show in episodes 21 and 22 of the first season called Fighting Cage : Part One and part two alongside 34E ( !!! ) - 22 - 35 PLAYBOY Playmate Of The Month For October in 1991 Cheryl Bachman from Jacksonville, Florida.

DON JOHNSON IN THE CITY : PSYCHO KILLER, QU'EST - CE QUE C'EST ?

Next up Ayer Nomas presents The City a failed tv pilot starring a very young Don Johnson as a cop and Star Wars Mark Hamill as a psycho killer.

Since I couldn't find the spanish version I am including the german dubbed one - called City Of Violence - but interested parties can find the original version on YouTube or watch it in the original frame format .

Keeping with Today's bonus section theme our episode of Journey To The Centre Of Television is all about rock and maybe it's just my antipathy against canadian Avril Lavigne ( Ever since she arrived on the music scene proclaiming herself as the anti Britney Spears I knew she was fake which she later proved by turning into a new version of Britney Spears for drooling grunge skateboard fanboys also if you really listen to the lyrics of Sk8er Boi it's not very romantic since the song is about a gold digger who is only interested in a skateboarder - or is it sk8 boarder ? - AFTER he achieves fortune and fame ) but do we have to include her ?

SOME PEOPLE CALL ME CAPTAIN HARLOCK SOME CALL ME RAIMAR

The populace of planet earth has become a mass of mindless, lethargic consumers glued to their tv screens watching reality tv shows while their political leaders and corporate overlords are slowly turning earth into a desolate wasteland that squanders its natural resources and has to look for their resources outside. At the same time an evil secret society of toxic feminists are slowly infiltrating every aspect of human existence and brainwashing the people with their hidden agenda. Sounds what is going on right now in the world ? Well, it is but in this case I am talking about 70s anime Space Pirate Captain Harlock ( Uchu Kaizoku Kyaputen Haarokku in the japanese original and Capitan Raimar in Peru ) by Leiji Matsumoto which turned out more prophetic than it seemed in the 70s.

I have included episode one but you can also find the rest of the first twelve episodes on this channel. Even if they are listed out of order.

ALL I WANNA DO IS ZOOMA ZOOM ZOOM ON SHIN MI'S BOOM BOOM !

Staying with asian exports that benefit all mankind we come to Muscle Mania's 2019 Miss Bikini Korea contender Shin Mi Hyun who has one of - if not THE best - butts in the competition. And keeping in mind that we are talking about a beauty / sports competition with korean women who are not only all naturally born perfect blow up sex dolls but are practically genetically engineered to have the best bubblebutts on the planet that's saying quite a lot. Man, if I was still a working stiff ( and getting stiffer by the second thanks to Shin Mi Hyun's bonerinducing butt cheeks ) I would love to spend my summer vacation - or at least four weeks - pounding the living daylights out of her dicktaming derriere. You can really wear your dick out with an ultimate men milking machine like her.

I thought I had no longer clip with her but then I remembered the second spotlight video with the golf outfit. She comes in at 2:10, 2:12 min - ish.

GHOSTS OF THINGS TO COME : MUTANTS, MUTANTS EVERYWHERE !

As I mentioned I like to have a theme to this section so we visit another dystopian future from the 70s as our pal Brandon Tenold takes his usual particular look at 1971s The Omega Man starring Charlton Heston ( best known for The Ten Commandments, Ben Hur and the original Planet Of The Apes although Today's audience might recognize him more from the very underrated Sam Neill horror flick In The Mouth Of Madness or Arnold Schwarzenegger's Nick Fury - esque boss in True Lies with 34C - 22 - 34 cult siren JaMILF Lee Curtis who delivers the best striptease in movie history in the action classic ) in a world overrun by mutants. And not the sexy and fun mutants like in Marvel Comics UNCANNY X - MEN .

The movie is based on the 1954 novel I Am Legend by Richard Matheson and there have been two other adaptions of the book : The Last Man On Earth in 1965 with Vincent Price and 2007s I Am Legend with Will Smith.

We have even more mutants with 90s cartoon Mutant League based on the video games Mutant League Football and Mutant League Hockey.

To tell you the truth I hadn't even heard of this show which is one of the reasons why I am still writing this blog. Yes, it can be a real pain finding material to include in the posts and they take forever to finish but I can't list all of the wonderful things I've discovered through making this blog.

Now originally I ended this post with the video above but since it has been eight months since I started this post I wanted to include an episode of Saturday Morning Serials for those faithful followers who hung in till the end. Besides Mutant League the almost four hours long video also features such classic series like Robocop, Dino Riders, Galaxy Rangers, Skeleton Warriors, Alvin And The Chipmunks, Camp Candy, James Bond Jr. - most of which I already featured on the blog - and a few more. And you can also find more episodes of Mutant League here.

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